Far Gone
by Feral Phoenix
Summary: Fleeing the living nightmare of his existence, the abused and tormented Kumo is given refuge with his supposed 'enemies'. But when Kaze decides to get his long-awaited revenge, the two of them stumble into depths no one had foreseen... Complete!
1. Prelude: Hoshi no Suna

Far Gone

DISCLAIMER: In the words of someone quite wise... "Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't own, so you don't sue." There you have it.

A/N: _Certain bastages _have decreed that we may no longer use song lyrics in our fanfics, even if they are disclaimed, so all the lyric bits in the beginning of each chapter have been removed. If you want the TRUE version of each chapter, email me. Chapters correspond to (in this order) the songs Hoshi no Suna, Hikari, Boulevard of Broken Dreams, Crash and Burn, Bring me to Life, Must Be Dreaming, Breaking the Habit, I Surrender, On the Way Down, Haunted, Romancing Train, and Give a Reason... NONE OF WHICH ARE OWNED BY ME.

Subject Warning: This story is SERIOUSLY not recommended for anyone under the age of 13. It deals with the subjects of rape and homosexuality (among other things) with varying degrees of intensity and contains several "adult situations" as well as some severe language. If you can't tolerate, don't read... don't say I didn't warn you.

Pairing Warnings: Mostly Kaze/Kumo, with several other couples in the background, i.e. one-sided Kaze/Lisa, possibly Cid/Miles, one-sided Kumo/Crux etc. etc. Also, this story will play heavily on the past-tense incestual relationship between Kiri and Kumo... as a _positive _thing. Once again, if you don't like don't read.

One More Warning: If for some reason you tend to side with Chaos and the Deathlords, or if you like them, or try to defend them, or _whatever, _this fic is really not for you. As far as this story goes they are being evil bastards and you will completely hate them when I am done. If you don't like, go away. I mean it.

...This is the last one, I _swear: _If you flame me, I'll give you to Juggernaut as his new chew toy, and when he's done with you, you'll have to deal with my muses and my friends. If you don't like you don't have to read goldangit!

---

He'd come back from the battlefield not long ago. To a casual observer, he might have seemed to be perfectly fine, but she, who had spent so much time watching him, had seen how his hands were clenched so tightly that his knuckles seemed white, how his normally graceful fluid movements seemed stiff and wooden, how his warm beautiful eyes were cold as frost. Every little thing about him screamed _anger, _screamed _hatred, _screamed _pain. _Something had happened to him out there, after she was called back. She was worried for him...

He had gone wordlessly into a large empty chamber of the airborne castle about half an hour ago, and since then had not come out.

She was truly worried.

And so, she followed him, waiting to be sure no one was watching. He seemed to desire solitude, but she knew that while he was not by nature a social creature, it pained him to be alone while he was hurting. And he was hurting.

He sat alone in the corner of the room, his long slender form curled into a tight ball, clutching something darkly colored to his chest. His head was bowed, and his soft bangs spilled into his face, covering his eyes. Because of the distance she wasn't sure, but she thought his shoulders were trembling. Was he actually...?

Hesitantly, she came within a few feet of him, then paused, unsure of how to approach him. "Kuriyu...?"

At the sound of her voice, he slowly looked up, turning to face her. His large jadeine eyes were very dark, filled to the brim with heartache and tears threatening to spill over. Unguarded, he looked like a small child, hurt and alone and needing someone--anyone--to comfort him.

"Crux...?"

She realized that he was holding a folded square of cloth, deep crimson in color, slightly tattered and stained with blood, pressing it to his heart as though he'd never let go, just before he pulled her into his trembling embrace.

"I... I... I..." She stared up at him, confused and slightly alarmed by his unusual behavior. He had squeezed his eyes shut, disregarding the hot tears that were beginning to spill down his cheeks as he did. "Niisama... I... I...!"

And with absolutely no warning at all, he promptly broke down and began to sob, curled into a ball around her small form and the folded cloak, his frail frame heaving with the power of his raw grief.

"Kuiyu..." Awkwardly, she pressed against him, trying to let him know that she would do what she could to comfort him, to help him.

"He's dead and it's my fault," he said through tears, speaking into her hair. "It's all my fault..."

And after that she simply could get nothing out of him. He was lost to his own guilt, lost to the grief that was threatening to overwhelm him body and soul. All she could do was be there for him, and hope that somehow that alone would be able to make him feel just a little bit better.

They stayed that way for some unknown expanse of time--perhaps hours, perhaps days; she had no way of judging. All that she knew was that eventually his stark, painful sobbing began to cease.

"I apologize for my outburst," he said softly, releasing her. His manner was unusually stiff and formal; she guessed his natural reticence was trying to reassert itself. "I shouldn't have troubled you with my emotions. I was out of control. Please forgive me."

"Kukuriyu," she replied, trying to sound cross. He didn't need to ask for her forgiveness! He'd been in dire need of someone to be there with him, and if she had been that someone, so much the better. There was nothing to forgive.

He tried a smile; although it held, his deep liquid eyes told her he was about to start crying again. "I'm sorry."

"Kuu..." She flitted back to his arms, pressing her face against the soft side of his throat. The least he could do was stop apologizing.

He enfolded her in a gentle embrace, leaning back against the cold metallic wall. When he spoke, his voice had stopped shaking. "I know... I'm sorry."

She sighed. He was such a hopeless case.

For a brief moment, he hugged her tightly and fiercely, then let go. "At least I still have you, right?" She blinked at him, hoping he wouldn't notice how her face had flamed. "Now go on, get out of here. You'll get in trouble."

She nodded and flitted off, but perched in the high alcoves near the ceiling of the room. She wanted to make absolutely sure that he was alright, trouble or no. She was the only one here who actually cared about him, and he the only one who cared about her. They had to look out for each other.

He headed back against the wall and sat down again, fingering the folded red cloth at his chest. "Oh, Niisama..." he whispered. "Why...? Why did it have to come to that? Wasn't the pain of losing you once enough for them? What did they _do _to you to turn your mind like that?" He curled up, pressing his face to his knees. "Or did... you always hate me?"

She saw, and ached for him.

Without so much as a creak of warning, the door to the chamber opened noiselessly. She felt a prickle at her back as she realized who it was--her creator, the necromancer... Oscha.

"Oh, _no, _my dear Makenshi-dono." He shot up, jadeine eyes widening in shock, clutching the cloak to his chest. "It took rather a while to convince him, and our most _extreme _measures... you should have _heard_ the way he screamed for you."

At Oscha's words, his hands balled into fists again, the knuckles whitening just as before. The hatred, the explosion of anger, was building again, faster and more furiously than ever.

"You bastard," he growled in a voice quite unlike the one she usually heard. "What did you _do _to him! ANSWER ME!"

Oscha seemed to deign the order beneath his time and went on with business as usual. "His Excellency is calling for you..." he said in silky tones. "He seems to desire an outlet for his frustration at Pist-sama's failure to capture Clear. You had better report to him quickly, Makenshi-dono, one of the four Deathlords of Gaudium..."

"No!" The word burst from his throat with more force than any word she'd ever heard spoken. She stared--he was standing ramrod straight, dual-bladed pride and hatred in every inch of his body. "I won't be the plaything of Chaos any longer! Go back to him, servant, and give him my answer--I will NEVER go to him again! I have had enough of ALL of it!"

Disconcertingly, Oscha burst out laughing. _"No?" _His tone dripped in condescending scorn. "My dear Makenshi, one does not simply say _no _to His Excellency..." His shadow drew a little closer to the righteous figure in white who stood still beside the wall. "Do you not... _enjoy _His Excellency's attentions...? _I _would have thought that someone perverted enough to sleep with his own _brother _would have _loved _every _second _of it..."

"Shut up," he snapped, his voice little more than a snarl.

"Dear me, such manners!" Oscha mocked. "I believe it is time that you learned to _behave..."_

Moving more swiftly than she would have believed possible, the twisted necromancer's form slipped forward and grabbed him by the throat, pinning him against the coldness of the wall. Within instants, all the hate drained out of his eyes, to be replaced by sheer terror. Her heart began to jerk uncomfortably in her chest.

"No... please..." His voice a broken whisper, he tried to shy away from Oscha's touch. "Don't... I beg of you, please..."

"It's far too late for _that," _Oscha replied, his voice filled with cold amusement.

And she, unable to turn away, saw it all.

Crux, the marionnette with free will, saw the truth of it.

(TBC)


	2. Fading Light

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

The submarine of the Comodeen's Flying Water expedition, Jane, had just landed on a small island that marked roughly the three-quarter point of their journey.

Cid, the pilot, hopped out of the cockpit with a yawn and sigh. "We've been able to travel for quite some time now without the Ocean Puzzle shifting and forcing us to take another challenge," he said cheerily. "Back at Gaudium, they must still be trying to figure out what happened last time when that immense explosion blew up one of their cubes!"

Knave, the middle-aged leader of the organization, nodded gravely and toyed with his cigar. "We should be safe here for the time being," he told his crew. "Let's disembark; all hands will have two hours of free time. Use it to relax as you will."

Everyone took the news well, especially the small group of travelers among them who weren't of the Comodeen's ranks.

"Fresh air and open skies," Yu Hayakawa said to no one in particular, stepping off the ladder. "It's just what you've been asking for, Sis... for a really long time now."

His twin sister, Ai Hayakawa, was silent as she looked around. While several days ago she might have been commenting loudly about the state of the tiny island, which was slightly shabby, now she was content to scrutinize the surroundings with a faint look of ennui on her face.

Lisa Pacifist, who was looking after the two of them as they searched for their missing parents throughout Wonderland, smiled and shook her head. "It doesn't look like that guy is coming out here at all," she observed, trying to break Ai out of her silence.

Yu, just realizing that fact himself, started to look around. "You're right... I wonder where he is?"

Ai put her hands on her hips and made a face. "Mister's prob'ly just sitting around in the submarine! That's all he ever does, just sit there and ignore everybody!"

Lisa's smile grew--for once, one of her plans had worked. "I'll go see if I can't persuade him that the sun won't hurt him," she said softly, joking. "Why don't you two go on a walk with Chobi-chan? Just make sure you don't get too far away from the Comodeen; I'll catch up to you later."

"Okay." The twins headed off towards the forest that covered most of the island with their pet chocobo, Chobi, trailing behind them.

Lisa, still smiling, shook her head. She was glad to see them happy for once--Yu was starting to despair that he'd ever see his mother and father again, and the latest incident in Pist's Ocean Puzzle had left Ai unusually thoughtful and quiet. It wouldn't do for them to lose hope now that they actually had a chance to accomplish what they'd set out to do.

Reminded of her intention by that thought, Lisa hurried back up the ladder to the submarine's interior in order to find their taciturn ally Kaze and drag him outside. Fresh air would do him some good as well.

---

Just as Ai and Yu reached the edge of the forest, Chobi let out a loud squawk. About to find out what was the matter with him, they both caught sight of what he had.

A streak of white was falling from the sky at an alarming rate. While the twins tried to discern what in the world it was, it fell past the treeline and crashed with a thud and crack audible even as far away as they were.

"Let's go," Yu said after the shock had worn off.

_"Yu!" _his sister protested. "It could be dangerous! We shouldn't go unless somebody's with us!"

"There's a path," Yu argued, unwilling to give up. "And, Sis... I think that was a _person. _They could be really hurt after falling like that! We can't just stand by when somebody's in trouble!"

Ai pouted, but just as she opened her mouth to give another protest, Chobi took off into the trees, following the tiny path that led to whatever had crashed.

The twins exchanged helpless looks and ran after him. There was nothing they could do about the decision now. The chocobo, of all people, had decided it for them.

After a short chase, the two of them caught up with Chobi, who had paused a few yards away from a very strange sight.

The large tree that he stood before seemed to have been half-crushed; most of its branches had apparently been ripped off by an impact of some sort, like a lightning strike. The dead branches, leaves still attached, lay among the roots of the giant denizen of the forest, and beneath the whole mess lay a broken figure in pale clothing.

Yu's eyes widened, and after a short pause taken to steel himself, he slowly and carefully walked forward, kneeling beside the pile and removing a few of the heavy branches. After he'd gotten them off, he let out a cry of disbelief.

"Sis! It's that guy from the city of clouds--Makenshi!"

Ai crept over to her brother's side. "D'you think he's dead...?"

The swordsman in white was half-buried beneath the pile of branches, what part of his body they could see covered in scratches and bruises, his clothing torn, his hair a mess, and a look of suffering on his face. The twins and Chobi hovered, unsure of what to do, for several minutes.

"What now?" Ai asked at last, turning to Yu for answers.

The brown-haired boy carefully reached forward, but shied at actually touching the unconscious swordsman. "I don't know," he said after a pause. "Take Chobi and go find Lisa! She'll think of something! The only thing I'm sure of is that we can't just leave him here, so GO!"

Normally, Ai might have argued, but for once she just nodded and headed back down the path with Chobi at her heels.

Yu turned back to the mess of snarled tree branches and wounded young man. After another helpless pause, he pulled a few more branches off the pile. As he was going back for the next, a faint sound made him stop dead--Makenshi, still in uncertain condition, had let out a weak moan and seemed to be waking up.

Only his parents' teaching that the wounded must always be helped made Yu kneel next to the white-clad swordsman, and even so, the attacks that Makenshi had made on the Comodeen were on a constant replay in his mind's eye. Although he honestly wanted to help, he couldn't forget that this "victim" could be truly dangerous.

"Hey..." he said softly, hesitantly. "Can you hear me? Are you okay?"

The young man moaned softly a second time, and his liquid jadeine eyes half-opened. To Yu, they seemed vague and uncertain, yet somehow wary.

"Are you okay?" he asked again, a little louder. "Are you hurt?" Stupid question, but still, he had to know. "Are you in much pain? What happened?"

He reached out to touch Makenshi's shoulder, but as soon as his hand got close, the sword-summoner flinched away, shrinking back towards the ground. His eyes, now open wide, were fixed on Yu's umber-brown ones, huge with a terrible fear. "Don't..." The word escaped the young man's lips as a whisper, but even so, Yu could tell that his voice was shaking with terror. "Please don't..."

_He's afraid... of me...? _Instantly, Yu's wariness melted into pity. "It's okay," he said as soothingly as he could. "Nobody's going to hurt you now. It's over. It's over." He continued to repeat the soft mantra until Makenshi started to relax. _He must really be out of it if he's this afraid of me. I hope Lisa can do something... _Still talking on and on as he might to a wounded animal, Yu placed his hand on Makenshi's shoulder. Now that he'd touched the swordsman, he could feel that the white-haired man's whole body was trembling uncontrollably. "It's okay now. Rest, just rest..."

After about another minute of Yu talking continuously, Makenshi finally drifted back out of consciousness. The young boy leaned back and flopped down into a sitting position, sighing out of sheer relief.

"What could have happened to make him act like this?" he wondered aloud. "What on earth happened?"

---

"Lisa! LISA!"

The young woman looked up, confused, to see Ai and Chobi tearing down the path out of the forest, both gasping for breath.

"Lisa! Come quick! We need help fast!"

"Slow down. What is it?" Lisa asked, putting her hands on Ai's shoulders once the twelve-year-old had stopped to catch her wind. "What's happened?"

"It's... that guy!" Ai cried, waving her arms frantically. "That guy who attacked the Comodeen before...!"

Lisa blinked, then stared. "Wait... Makenshi! Here? What's he planning on doing now?"

"He's hurt!" Ai went on, not letting Lisa finish the thought. "Really really hurt! We don't know what to do but we've gotta do SOMETHING or else he's gonna die!"

Still confused, Lisa shook her head. "Well then... I think I'd better come see this..."

"Come ON!" Ai was already down at the path. "We've got to go!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming..."

And so the two of them went, with Chobi still running circles around them, squawking frantically.

---

Upon seeing the pitiful broken body beside the great tree, Lisa felt her world tilt.

Yu had managed to get most of the branches away from Makenshi, and was now sitting next to the unconscious swordsman, looking worried. Ai ran to her brother and joined him in staring at the pale bloodied form of the one they'd both thought was an enemy.

Lisa hurried over and knelt at the swordsman's side, looking back and forth between the wounds which, to her, told a disturbing story. Makenshi's face was bruised with patches of dark blue and violet, overlapping a few lighter-colored marks, and there were clear hand marks on his throat. There were other cuts and bruises all over his body, but some of them looked old while others were obviously fresh. A fine ribbon of blood was coursing from his slightly parted lips, and darker blood was pooling beneath his hips, welling--or so it seemed--from between his legs. Lisa dug her nails into her palm to keep from crying out. Although she already knew, she couldn't stop asking herself what had happened here. What was even more important was _who _had done it and _why. _Now that she had seen, there was no question of it--she was going to get him help. Now. No matter what those of the Comodeen said. She knew a victim of abuse when she saw one, and Makenshi was one if nobody else ever had been.

"He woke up a few times while you were still coming here," Yu was saying. "Each time, he really seemed out of it... he looked almost like he was afraid of me... he kept giving me these big scared eyes... something's really wrong with him, Lisa..."

Frowning, Lisa levered the last branches off the body, then carefully, gently lifted it into her arms. For a moment, she was surprised at how light Makenshi was--he had to weigh less than she did, for all that he was so much taller than her. Shaking it off, she looked back at the twins. "I'm going to take him back to the submarine," she told them. "Don't let anybody protest, and especially don't let Kaze anywhere near him. Once everyone sees what condition he's in, they shouldn't complain about it. Someone or something's been beating this young man." _And that's just the half of it, but I can't tell you that. _"I'm not going to let him leave until he's received some proper medical treatment." And with that, she turned back towards the others, taking Makenshi with her.

---

Lisa was true to her word.

Upon seeing the bizarre spectacle of their "enemy" helpless and wounded, most members of the Comodeen adamantly refused him shelter. They were too wary that all this might be some clever ruse, and in any case, they didn't really care if Makenshi lived or died.

Lisa didn't like that.

"Just _look _at him!" she snapped. "Do you expect me to abandon him when I know that we have the resources to take care of him! How about you? Would you be okay with having no one to take care of you if you were in his state! How can you be so callous! This is your fellow living creature, he is suffering, and I am going to put a stop to that pain, whether you like it or not!"

Cid scratched his head, looking awkward. "Well... I suppose that when he wakes up, it would be a good time to find out what in Wonderland has been going on," he admitted.

"You could be right," Knave agreed with a sigh. "Fine, so be it. You can keep him here until he's well enough to leave, but only until then."

Lisa sighed in relief, looking down at Makenshi, who she still had cradled in her arms, his long slim frame spilling out of her hold. In truth, she wasn't exactly sure about any of this either, but she did know that she couldn't just leave the swordsman to suffer and die alone. She wouldn't compromise her moral code for the sake of convenience--doing so would mean sinking to the level of the Earl and his Deathlords, the Comodeen's sworn enemies.

"I'm going to take care of you," she whispered to the fluff-haired, badly bruised face resting against her shoulder. "You're going to be okay now, I promise."

As she headed towards the infirmary, she did not notice the pair of angry, accusing cerulean eyes that followed her down the submarine's corridors.

(TBC)


	3. Walking Alone

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

_Frightened... so frightened._

_The little boy plunked himself down on the corner of the nearest building, tucked his chin to his knees, and started to sob, shaking violently. There were smudges of scraped skin along his face, hands, elbows, and knees, and his soft white clothing was dirty from the falls he'd taken. He felt like he'd been looking forever, and he hadn't found anything. Never before had he felt so afraid._

_Always before, he'd been able to find _someone _he knew when he got lost, which was shamefully often. But now... had they just left him this time? Left him behind, with all the inconveniences he brought?_

_"Kumo! KUMO!"_

_He looked up, not daring to hope, his breath catching in his throat._

_"Oniichan...?"_

_Thereshoving through the crowds, a boy slightly older than him, dressed all in red with short messy crimson hair and bright carmine eyes, let out another call. "KUMO!"_

_"Oniichan!" Shakily, he stood up, running unsteadily towards the short slim figure._

_"Ah...!" Turning, the boy in red caught him, folding him into a tight embrace, pressing him to a heart that raced with the adrenaline born of fear. "There you are! Mom and I have been looking all over for you! Where did you get to this time, ototo-chan? You scared us!"_

_"Kiri-niichan...!" Too relieved even to speak, little Kumo simply burst into tears, burying his face in his big brother's shirt. Kiri, starting to relax himself, stood patiently and cuddled the petite white body until his baby brother's sobbing quieted._

_"You always get so lost," he said gently, leaning down to click the nubs of hard gray bone that served as their spikes together affectionately. "You make us worry about you so much. Kumo-chan, you've got to stay with us when we're out; you have no sense of direction." _

_"I'm sorry," Kumo said humbly._

_"Don't worry about it," Kiri replied. "Let's get back. Mom'll get worried." Awkwardly, he pressed his lips to his brother's cheek, tugging him along. "I'm just glad you're okay..."_

_The images blurred, changed; the moment became a different kiss on the cheek, a different time._

_"Good job out in practice today." The voice belonged to Kiri, several years laterthis was his nineteen-year-old self speaking, warmth and mischief in his eyes, long crimson mane tossed carelessly over his shoulder. "I take it that you're feeling a lot better now?"_

_Kumo tried his best to smile. In truth, he was still slightly uneasy, but Kiri had certainly been right about training taking the edge off of worry. "It was a good idea. Thank you for helping me."_

_Kiri gave his little brother's white hair a playful ruffle. "Hey, when my cute little ototo-chan wakes up screaming at the crack of dawn, I know I've got to do whatever I can to help him." His expression sobered, and he placed a hand on Kumo's shoulder. "I mean it. Are you honestly alright now? You only smile like that when you're trying to hide something, so don't try to cover it up."_

_Kumo nodded, the trembling façade dropping from his face as he did so. "Yes. I'm not sure if I'm absolutely perfect, but I really do feel much better than I did. Truly. And I have you to thank for it."_

_A slow coy smile spread over Kiri's fine features, and he drew close to his brother, his movements almost seductive. "So thank me," he said with a smirk, and leaned forward. Within a matter of instants, their lips were locked together._

_As the kiss deepened, Kiri's hands started to move as if they had a mind of their own, running over Kumo's soft firm sides, playing idly with the fastenings of his clothes. Kumo, oblivious so far, let his own hands roam up to Kiri's shoulders, gripping them hard, nails digging in._

_The moments passed by like wingbeats, and Kiri's lips wandered from Kumo's to his throat, his collarbones, his shoulders, the soft lobe of his left ear. Kumo's hold tightened, and liquid traced up his spine; he needed Kiri's firm solidity and the wall behind him to stay upright. In between breathless cries of pleasure, he tried to form the words. "Not here... not here..."_

_"Quiet," the redhead said against the hollow of his little brother's throat. Slowly, they began to slip down the wall, Kumo still weakly trying to protest and Kiri, blatantly ignoring him, covering his slender throat with kitten's kisses. By the time they hit the ground, Kiri had his brother's shirt off, and the white-haired young man was working on undoing the crimson uniform._

_Sometime between the impact and the rush of satisfaction when the last of the ties holding Kiri's clothes together finally gave, Kumo's blood began to pulse, flooding his entire body with a strange desperate longing that sang through his being like the enchantments of Mist. He felt himself rise to Kiri's advance, gasping in painful wanting, his eyes half-closed and his face as brilliantly red as his brother's hair, straining, straininglet it be the moment, let it be the time... now..._

_A heavy footstep near the door brought them back to their senses, and they sprang apart, putting several feet of distance between them, both staring at the door, bodies that had only seconds ago given in to arousal taut and ready for a fight. Another heavy footstep, and then the presence receded._

_Kumo sighed and slumped against the wall, collecting his shirt from the floor beside him and holding it to his chest. Kiri shook his head, looking pale and bewildered. They stood mustering their thoughts and words for a few moments, then looked briefly at each other and spoke._

_"We need to talk," Kumo said shortly._

_"Yes," Kiri replied with a burst of crimson sigh. "Yes, we do."_

_"Today," Kumo added, giving Kiri a stern look._

_"Yes, that. Today would be good."_

_"Later...?"_

_"An hour. Gotta go..." Kiri shrugged one shoulder, looking embarrassed. "Take care of, um, stuff..."_

_Kumo knew what he meant. Even if most of you was perfectly fine with going straight from splitting-your-pants to barroom brawl mode, some of you never quite behaved. "Yeah... go ahead..."_

_Kiri slunk towards the door. The two of them gave each other one last, confused "What happened here?" look, and parted. Kumo, relieved, sat down very quickly._

_"What happened?" he asked aloud. The empty room gave him no answer._

* * *

"Would you mind waiting outside for a moment?" Lisa asked the twins. They had made it to the hospital wing of the submarine, and the army's doctor was preparing to take a look at the still-unconscious Makenshi. 

Yu nodded, looking confused. "Sure... why?"

Lisa sighed. "I think we're going to have to strip him down to see just how badly he's hurt," she confessed. "I'm just trying to respect his privacy by not having a lot of people around to watch."

Ai gave her a sidelong look. "So then why is it that you can stand to take off _Makenshi's _clothes when you can't even give _Kaze _CPR? The love storm rages on..."

Yu grabbed his sister's arm. "C'mon, Sis, you're embarrassing her..." The two of them left, closing the door behind them.

Lisa, staring after them, shook her head. _Good question. Ask me some other time and I may have an answer... _"So..." She turned back to the doctor. "Let's go, then..."

"Why did you really want them out of the room?" the man asked shrewdly.

"Because I have a feeling that this is going to be pretty bad, and I'm not sure that I want them to see and start asking difficult questions," Lisa replied unhappily but honestly.

With that settled, the two of them got down to business. Between the two of them, they managed to carefully maneuver the young swordsman out of his tattered white clothes, trying not to cause any pain as they did so.

"Pretty bad is a good term for the state of things," the doctor said wryly once they'd finished, looking at Makenshi with his hands planted on his hips. "But I think it's not quite appropriate, given the extent."

Lisa, who thought she'd steeled herself for the worst, was digging her nails into her palm again to keep from crying out in horror. The layers of bruising that had marred the swordsman's face covered his entire body in blotches of blue-purples and pale reds. Thin cuts like scratches formed laced patterns over the bruises, some healed and some not. And traces of blood, dried and fresh, streaked across the insides of his thighs and his groin.

"You said before that you thought this was a case of sexual abuse," the doctor told her, digging in a nearby drawer for gauze and tape. "I think that either you're right and this has been going on for a while, or this guy has an obsession with rough sex and he's really been overdoing it lately. But of those two options, the first one is definitely more probable, if you were right about his behavior earlier." Stacking his finds on the side of the bed, he handed Lisa a thin tube of cream. "Here. Put some antiseptic on these scratches and I'll fix them up. All we can do at this point is take care of the physical wounds; when he wakes up we'll see how badly he's been traumatized by it all. Rape isn't exactly a happy experience for anyone, especially the victim."

Nodding, Lisa took the antiseptic and started working, deep in her worries. What in the world was going on here? Somehow, Makenshi had fallen from the sky, covered in wounds both new and pre-existing. He worked for the Earl, and so this had most likely happened to him there... what was going on? And why would the Deathlords want to harm one of their own, especially like this...?

* * *

The little bastard was there. He could sense it. And now that everyone else had left... he was ready to do it, finish things once and for all. 

True, much of his memory was still incomplete. He could recall bits and pieces of his childhood and mere fragments of Windaria's end... but he could remember enough to know that that scoundrel had been deeply involved in Aura's death.

He couldn't remember _exactly _what had happened, but in his heart he knewthe one who was responsible was his nemesis, his rival, his enemythe strange young swordsman known to him as White Cloud.

And tonight... that swordsman would die by his hand.

As quietly as he knew how, he stalked into the infirmary, hand tightening on the grip of his gun. He almost wished that he could end his foe's life with the Magun, but... one solid shot, enough to destroy the brain or the heart, would suffice. Although both their races healed quickly and could withstand many kinds of attacks, that would be enough to finish him. No need to be showy. And no need to drag things out... circumstances had already made the little bastard go through something he himself could never have accomplished: the pain of losing a sibling, the same pain he had suffered so long ago.

It was dark, but his eyes adjusted quickly to the low light. His enemy, White Cloud, was asleep, just as he'd expected, but...

He frowned. It should have been obvious by the fact that he was in the infirmary, but he hadn't expected the swordsman to be wounded like this. He was covered in bruises and light cuts, with bandages covering injuries that were apparently fresh or especially bad. By the folded white clothes on the bedside table, he deduced that his rival was naked beneath the thin sheet laid over him by someone or other. Briefly, he wondered what had happened, but decided that compared to the task of revenge, it wasn't important.

Viciously, he wished that the swordsman's dream was a good one. It was going to be his last.

* * *

_The pitch darkness threatened to swallow him whole._

_He could not see anything, and any kind sound he might hear was drowned out by the harsh breathing above him. And after so long, he was dead to everything but the pain. There was just so much of it that it was hard to focus on anything else... the vague feeling of wrongness combined with the stabs, the flashes of agony that fell in rhythm with the violent rocking of their bodies... the moments when the greedy hands squeezed or the nails dug in so deeply, so hard that he could only give faint cries of pain... the hold on his throat that grew so tight, so painful that he felt almost lightheaded... the roaming touch that left a sickly aching, a burning in its wake. He couldn't move, could barely breathe, could not feel past those touches and the pain with them and the shameful coat of sweat that covered his skin. It hurt. Chaos meant it to hurt._

_It was all just so wrong. He was sure that things were not supposed to feel this way... they hadn't on that day when, so long ago, he and Kiri had almost done it... but he could never be completely certain. He'd never felt them any differently._

_The shame was almost as bad. It happened often... he would be called in whenever Chaos was angry or frustrated. He was an outlet for it all, just a convenient way to take out those base emotions and the built-up lust and gain power too, while the fiend was at it. His own despair threatened to overwhelm him every day, stifling his cries and cutting him off from his own emotions. Every time it happened, he lay as still as he could until the paralysis, the exhaustion was enough at bay that he could stand, leave, regroup his strength, dodge the bawdy remarks from Chaos' other servants, and hide alone, nursing his bruises and the cuts and waiting until they healed enough to be hard to see before showing his face again. Every time, as he sat alone in a corner with a finger to his bleeding lips, he was silent, and motionless, unable to cry. If ever he did, he wouldn't be able to stop, and so he was thankful for that. Instead, he asked himself _why. _Why did he never fight back, why did he never refuse? Was he just too much of a coward, or was it as they all said... that he secretly enjoyed it all? He didn't know, but the question chasing around his mind cut him deeply every time it came into the light._

_He watched Kaze from a distance, letting the only thing that wasn't despair or hatred course through his heart. The word was... sympathy. Or better... empathy._

You and I are the same, _he thought to himself. _We walk alone in this world, each of us on our given path, unable to turn from it. You cannot escape bloodshed, and I... I cannot escape this shameful place.

_His life had no meaning, but he had no way to end things. He could not die until Chaos was defeated..._

_He could not stand to live, and yet he could not die..._

* * *

"Wake up," Kaze said softly in a voice laced with hatred. 

Makenshi stirred, then tensed. As he caught sight of Kaze's silhouette, he flinched away, his jadeine eyes suddenly wide and filled with wild panic.

"No... no!" His voice was filled with fear, high-pitched with hysteria, sounding on the verge of tears. "Stay away! _Stay away!"_

Kaze blinked, caught off guard. Where had this reaction come from? This wasn't like his rival at all... Makenshi always faced Kaze with the same countenance of quiet composure, surety, and sorrow. Where had the swordsman's confidence gone? Why was he so afraid?

"No! Don't... don't touch me!" Kaze, still confused, started to take a step forward, and Makenshi shrank away, his body forming a protective half-curl, his hands clenched into fists at his chest and his thighs tucked tightly together. "Don't!"

Utterly baffled, Kaze stepped back instead. He was starting to understand that there was something seriously wrong hereMakenshi's blind, out-of-control fear and his defensive posture _screamed _outa warning, not to mention that his mental state seemed to be very fragile. What in the world was going on?

"Please don't..." Makenshi said in a soft, cracking voice, his eyes starting to fill with tears, his entire face begging hopelessly. "Please... please... not again... don't hurt me again..."

The lights snapped on, and Kaze heard Lisa, behind him, begin to ask, "What's going?" but fall silent as she took in the scene. Kaze looked back at her uncertainly as if to ask her if he'd done something wrong, then glanced at his trembling rival.

A flicker of recognition finally lit Makenshi's jadeine eyes, and he spoke softly, hesitantly, his voice shaking. "Kaze...?" As he spoke the name, a single tear slipped down his cheek.

(TBC)


	4. Crash and Burn

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

"...he seems to have fallen from Gaudium, Your Excellency." 

The small child sitting in the hoverchair made a soft sound of dissatisfaction. "Now, Oscha, why did you have to do that? You could have just brought him to me and had done with it."

The smoky figure of the necromancer bowed low, bending almost double. "Forgive me, Your Excellency. He did not have the proper... attitude... for approaching you. Rebellion does not suit you."

"It would have been interesting to watch him try to fight," the embodiment of Chaos said with a cold smile. "If ever it happens againonce we reclaim him, of coursejust give him to me and watch."

"Of course, Your Excellency..."

* * *

"Kaze...?" 

_All this, _Lisa thought to herself, _and he's only just realized who it is standing in front of him...? He's not taking this well at all..._

Kaze himself looked stunned, staring at his helpless rival as though he had quite forgotten why he was in the room in the first place.

"Kaze...? It is... really you, isn't it...?" Still pale and trembling, Makenshi had relaxed a fraction of a hair. A second tear chased the first down his cheek, then a third. "Please... Kaze...

"Please kill me!"

Both Kaze and Lisa stared, not quite able to believe what they were hearing.

"Kill me," Makenshi insisted. "I can't... I can't live with this anymore..." He crossed his arms over his chest as if to enfold himself in his own embrace. "I can't keep going anymore... it's all just too much... I can't...!" Slowly and painfully, he sat up. "Just look at me...! How am I supposed to protect you... protect _anyone _like this...? I can't do this anymore... I'm so tired... so tired of living hurt and afraid!... I'm not strong enough... I never _was _strong enough... it hurts... it hurts... it hurts so much... just... please... kill me before they find me... I can't go through this again... I don't want to die... from what they do to me..." He shook his head, letting his tears fly around his face in a haze of bright droplets. "Almost every day... I can't do this anymore, I can't! My brother is dead... and you hate me..." He reached out and gripped Kaze's left hand, which was currently clenched tightly on his shotgun, and lifted it to his chest, the gun with it. "All you have to do... is pull the trigger... please... I don't... I don't want to live anymore... please...!"

Kaze just stood there staring, quite incapacitated by Makenshi's sudden outburst. He looked slowly to Lisa, as if to ask what he was supposed to do, then back at his supposed rival as Makenshi's grip on his wrist slipped, letting hand and gun both fall.

"Please..." The swordsman's body was shaking again, but this time with sobs instead of fear. "Kaze... please...!" Giving in to tears, he collapsed against Kaze, who went rigid in shock, and broke down, crying so hard that it looked almost painful.

A brief fragment of memory filtered through the gunman's mind, unprompted.

_"He's gone... he's gone...!"_

_He and Aura exchanged helpless looks, unsure as to what they were supposed to do._

_"He's gone... he's gone... and it's all my fault... I wasn't there to help them... why couldn't I have been there to help them! Why...? WHY!"_

_"Kumo..." Aura began, slowly fitting her arms around the thin frail white form that convulsed in powerful sobs. "There was nothing we could do...nothing _you _could do! Don't blame yourself!" She looked up at Kaze and gave him a distressed look, trying to get him to help. "We've all lost our homes, and everything else with them! You've got to hang in there! Don't let what's happened kill you!"_

_"But I _want _to die," the swordsman sobbed into Aura's shoulder. "Without my brother... without Kiri... life isn't worth living anymore...! I loved him! I shouldn't have let this happen! It's all my fault... all my fault...!"_

_"You have to live." It was his own voice speaking; he'd gone over to his sister and the sobbing wreck of the man he'd thought was his enemy, kneeling beside them. "You have to help us pay Chaos back for everything it's done... you have to live..."_

"You have to live," he said quietly and gently, his voice mingling with that in the fragment of his memory, looking down at Makenshi. As soon as he'd said the words, he wondered why he had. This was his nemesis... the one responsible for his sister's death... wasn't it...?

"Kaze..." Makenshi whispered, and lost consciousness.

* * *

"That was kind of you," Lisa said softly. 

She and Kaze were still in the infirmary. Between the two of them, they'd managed to get Makenshi into a more comfortable position without waking him, replacing the two soft sheets that had covered his battered body. However, the young man had managed to catch hold of Kaze's hand again, and still had a death grip on it which Kaze seemed uneasy about breaking. And so, they sat up with the wounded swordsman, keeping vigil beside him through the small hours of the night.

"What you did for him, I mean," Lisa went on. She had long since realized that with Kaze, she'd have to do the majority of the talking, and didn't mind filling in his silences with speech so long as it didn't annoy him. "You didn't have to comfort him like that... I know you're angry with him."

Kaze said nothing, but looked down at his hand, which Makenshi's was still curled around. The sight of their intertwined fingers made him feel... strange. His own hands were rough and blunt, chafed by the explosions of countless gunshots, but his rival's was slender and fine-fingered, as well as soft except for the swordsman's calluses along the palm and fingertips.

"What's wrong with him?" he asked suddenly, his voice sounding almost harsh in the emptiness.

Lisa looked down at her nailbitten hands, folded neatly in her lap. "Kaze... he..." She shook her head. "We don't know for certain, but... I think he's been... abused." Shaking her head again, she covered her eyes with one hand, her voice bending. "Someone beat and raped him, Kaze... so that's why he's... like this."

Feeling the beginnings of protective anger stir in his core, Kaze looked back to Makenshi's face, taking in the look of melded youth and world-weariness.

"It seems to have been going on for some time," Lisa's voice went on in the background. "I guess he'd just had enough of it all... maybe he'd been trying to end it when he fell..."

Kaze, still watching Makenshi, could not get the image of the man in white clinging desperately to his sister, his body wracked with sobbing, as the two of them did their best to console him out of his head. It simply didn't fit with the other images he had seen of the sword-summoner in his fractured memoriesthe battle-hardened young warrior with the killing blade. The weeping child he'd seen could never have caused Aura to do what she did.

And yet... if it _wasn't _Makenshi's fault that Aura had died, then whose was it?

What could Kaze believe?

* * *

Lisa could not help but give a tired smile when she remembered the scene. Within an hour's time, Kaze had also wound up sleeping, and he'd collapsed against the side of the bed, out cold. Makenshi, oblivious to it all (thankfully), had kept on clinging to Kaze's hand. 

There would be no trouble between them now, she was sure of it. Kaze had been unable even to make his so-called mortal enemy let go of his hand, let alone kill him when he'd begged to die. His actions had surprised her, but at least she no longer had to worry about bloodshed while she tried to pull Makenshi out of his deep depression.

What she couldn't understand was why she felt the quiet ache of old loss in her heart. Makenshi needed someone badly, and Kaze needed to break out of the cycle of revenge... so why... why couldn't she be happy for them...?

* * *

_Warmth. Safety. It was so long since he had last felt these beautiful emotions._

_The softness of the sheets around him, the plush mattress beneath him, the soft breathing beside him... all were as familiar as an old lullaby, assuring him that everything was alright and would turn out alright and would always be, and turn out, alright._

_Had all of that, then, just been a dream... a dark nightmare sent from the sorrowed heart of Nallorn? If the patron spirit of haunted sleep had been responsible, then he would know that he should take it into account and learn from it, no matter how painful. He would talk to Kiri about it later, though the dream was shameful._

_They had spoken long about the issue of their out-of-control feelings for each other. It wasn't exactly common for those of Mystaria to find their soul mate within their family, but it had happened before, and when it was true, it was accepted. The two of them couldn't think of anything but their emotions being true... they had loved each other since they were small children, and that was never going to change. So... they would let things happen as Fate dictated. If they were true soul mates, they would end up going to bed sooner or later, although the thought of it made nervous wings flutter in Kumo's belly. As custom strictly dictated, he was a virgin, and would remain so until he and his soul mate were life-bonded, by the law of word, heart, or ceremony. Until that fateful day in the equipment room of the practice courts, he'd never even considered the concept of sex, and the idea of making love to Kiri both excited and frightened him. Thinking about it made his heart race and his blood pound feverishly, but secretly he wasn't sure he would be able to make such a powerful commitment. The oath of a life-bond was one vow that it was unthinkable to break. Even the rare case of being forced upon was considered a stain on the purity of one's pact. It was part of the reason that those who had suffered sexual abuse during the long-ago wars between the people of the sky and the people of the earth even now had trouble forgiving themselves for the transgression, even if it wasn't their fault._

_That was part of the reason Kumo was, for the first time, afraid to share a dream with his brother. For in that dream... he had been raped by a stranger with cold, cruel eyes. Over and over, until he bled and he thought his body would burst from the pain. Even now he felt shamed, nauseated, achy, swollen. Even now he felt as if he could cry._

_As he felt the mattress he laid on shift beside him, he bit his lip and steeled himself to speak. Kiri would know there was something wrong; he'd need to tell. And what would come afterthe tears, the kisses, the cuddles, and hopefully the forgivenesswould be worth it. He turned, opened his eyes..._

...and looked up into Kaze's shadowed face.

Realization came in a rush as he tried to fight off the madness threatening to drag him into the deepest of the nine hells. _It hadn't been a dream. It had all been real..._

"Kaze," he said in a tiny voice. What now? The gunner could barely remember anything... and hated him for reasons he kept to himself. What would he do now...?

But there was pain deep within those cerulean eyes, and though Kaze's expression was apathic as always, he felt a squeeze at his handand realized that his fingers and the gunner's were entwined. He blushed as he realized that he must have fallen asleep still clutching Kaze's hand, and dropped it as if it were a hot brick he'd grabbed by mistake.

"Kaze," he said again, trying to make his voice steady. What to do? The gun-summoner was obviously waiting for him to make the first move, but he was so tongue-tied that he wasn't sure he'd be able to manage speech. He swallowed hard and for the first time noticed the rusty, metallic taste in his mouth. Blood. Wonderful. Remembering, he grimaced and was grateful his voice wasn't entirely ruined by the screaming... and what had forced him into silence. He shuddered.

"Shiroi Kumo." The sound of his name, spoken by Kaze's hoarse baritone with that old note of affection, made him start, his heart skipping a beat. Sitting up painfully, he stared up into Kaze's eyes, watching them blur as his own filled with tears.

A strong, earth-firm arm fitted around him, pulling him to Kaze's black-cloaked shoulder. Surrounded by the warmth and concern of his old friend, he couldn't help it any longer. He broke down, crying in raw, broken wails that were just barely stifled by the dark fabric. "I'm sorry." Two little words that could not hope to cover everything he wanted to say. "I'm sorry." Sorry about what happened to your sister. Sorry for killing my brother, my soul mate. Sorry I couldn't help you. Sorry you hate me. Sorry they hurt me. Sorry sorry sorry.

And through it all, Kaze held him tightly, not seeming to mind that his cloak was getting soaked, or that Kumo's steel-cold spikes were pressed up against the rigid bone of his shoulder. Kaze held him and let him cry himself into exhaustion, his own heart seized with the pain of acknowledging that they were no longer enemies.

And when Lisa came in to give them something to drink, she found Kumo curled tightly beside Kaze, clinging to the fabric of his cloak, fast asleep with Kaze still holding him loosely, letting him have a moment of peace, looking about ready to take a nap himself.

For the first time since he'd awakened, his heart no longer felt quite so empty.

(TBC)


	5. Confession

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

After a few days' worth of rest, Kumo was finally able to stand without his knees giving out on him or getting so dizzy he had to lie back down or he'd faint. He managed to persuade the doctor into getting him an oversized T-shirt (his clothes were still too torn-up and bloody to wear), and proceeded to camp out with Kaze in the main chamber of the submarine. 

His appearance was heralded with staring, then gasps as members of the Comodeen noticed the fading bruises that mottled the skin of his arms and legs and the thin cuts and scratch marks that traced red patterns across the spatches of bruises that had only half-healed. An equal amount of gawkers couldn't take their eyes off the still-all-too-clear hand marks on his throat. Kumo shrank away from their beady, shameless eyes, looking shy and extremely uncertain, and hurried over to Kaze's side, curling up beside him and clinging to his arm, seeming almost like he was trying to disappear into the gunner's side so that no one could give him those looks of horror again.

_This will never do, _Lisa thought exasperatedly to herself, and put her hands on her hips. "Be ashamed," she scolded. "What would your mothers have to say about this? Stop staring at the poor thing, he's frightened! And you're being EXTREMELY rude! Don't you all have posts to go to?"

The soldiers of the corps suddenly remembered that each of them had much more imperative tasks than staring at Kumo like a bunch of stupid cows, and hurried off to accomplish those tasks. Lisa, sighing, sat down on the swordsman's other side and gently fluffed his hair.

"I'm sorry about that," she said softly. "I don't think any of them really had any idea how badly you're hurt..."

Kumo nodded, although he still looked as though he wanted to melt through Kaze's cloak out of pure shame. "K-kansha suru..."

"Just rest for now," she told him. "It's okay. You can sit here with Kaze and do whatever you'd like while I go try to convince Knave to let you stay a little longer. I don't want to turn you out... you've probably got nowhere to go but Gaudium... and that's where you were hurt, isn't it?" Kumo said nothing, but snuggled a little closer to Kaze's side and regarded Lisa with large eyes filled with worry. "Don't worry. I won't let them make you leave."

Those big, soulful jadeine eyes followed her as she turned her back and walked towards the room where she had asked Knave to meet her. The mingled fear and hope they held haunted her. She had to bargain the extra time out of the Comodeen's leader. He was only trying to ensure the safety of his troops, but all the same, she couldn't let him turn this helpless child out when he needed shelter so badly. She had seen more than the others suspected, had held Kumo with Kaze until his shaking stopped, given him a soft cloth to stanch the bleeding of the lip he'd bitten in his sleep, helped him wipe the sickly perspiration of terror from his skin. Some days he was barely able to keep his mind from going to pieces. He wasn't ready to go out on his own. He was as much her charge now as Ai and Yu were. She had to get him more time. She simply had to.

"The agreement was that he leave as soon as he was able," Knave grumbled as soon as Lisa shut the door behind her. "He looks perfectly capable of walking off to me."

Lisa frowned. "His physical wounds are beginning to heal, yes," she conceded. "But mentally... he's still unstable. Look at him... he's not himself. He clings to Kaze whenever they're in the same room together, bites his lip open and claws at his arms and wrists while he's asleep, wakes up in a cold sweat at least once every night... and it's taking everything I can possibly do for him to keep him holding on to his sanity right now. He was raped, Knave. Raped and terrorized by the same people who engineered that little incident with his brother in the city of clouds not so long ago. Please try to understand. You lost your home... you know what it's like to feel helpless... please."

Knave grumbled more. "How long is this going to take?"

Lisa fidgeted, then shrugged. "I don't know. Days. Weeks. Perhaps months."

"And all this time, we'll have an agent of the Earl with us," Knave pointed out. "Our safety depends on getting him out of here as soon as we can. You know this."

"But all the same," Lisa said with another frown. "You can't turn him out... he'll die on his own. Or if he's taken back to Gaudium, what then? The same thing will probably happen to him all over again."

Knave sighed. "This is impossible." He gave Lisa a look, then sighed again. "Fine... you can keep him here for a little bit longer. But only until he's fully able to leave. You can't keep him as a little pet, you know. He's a man, not a child. And he's made his choice."

Lisa sighed unhappily. "I know." Sometimes, however, it was easy to forget that Kumo wasn't just like Ai or Yu, a child who depended on her completely to survive. Though he clung to her and to Kaze and needed their help to pull out of his current state, and he certainly was young, his time with the Deathlords had hardened him. He was an adult, and as Knave said, he had made his choice... to stay with the Earl. She just wished that she could convince him to stay here instead...

Leaving the room, she headed down the hall, knowing that she would have to speak to several people and yet let Kumo know that he'd just gotten a little longer to recover. Passing Yu, she tapped the boy on the shoulder. "Yu, would you mind carrying a message to Kumo for me? I'm afraid that I'm too busy to tell him myself, but it's important."

The little brunet nodded with a smile. "Sure! Just tell me what it is, I'd be glad to help..."

* * *

Heading into the lower section of the submarine's main chamber, Yu spotted Kaze and Kumo instantly. The starkness of their forms, white on black, was easy to pick out, and Kumo's exotic appearance was even easier to spot when combined with his physical state. 

Kumo was leaning against Kaze's side, clinging to his arm, head on his shoulder, eyes closed, looking overwhelmingly tired. His injuries were still stark and it made Yu wince to look at them, but they seemed to be fading quite a bit from their original state. The swordsman was healing... it was an immense relief to the boy to know that.

Kaze, who usually sat morose and alone and unapproachable, was leaning against the wall with his eyes closed and a strange familiar look on his faceit seemed to be a meld of tolerance and affection; Yu couldn't place where he'd seen it before, until... _Lou, _he thought to himself, remembering. _He's acting just like he did when Lou was traveling with us. He let her hang all over him and didn't bat an eye... just like now._

"Hey," he said softly, coming up to them. Kumo blinked and looked up, and Kaze opened one eye to give Yu a brief and piercing stare before closing it again. "Lisa wanted me to tell you that you can stay here for as long as you need to now. Nobody's gonna kick you out."

Sitting up, Kumo inclined his head to Yu gratefully. "Kansha suru." With agonizingly slow movements, he pulled himself to his feet against the inner bulkhead. "I... am going back to the infirmary... I'm afraid that I... don't feel well." With careful steps, he began to head for the door.

Yu frowned a little. Was something still wrong? He turned to Kaze, then was about to look back at Kumo when he saw it.

Blood.

There was a small pool of blood where Kumo had been sitting, and when Yu turned back to call out to him, he noticed a bloody spot of about the same size on the back of his long T-shirt. Even as he tried to figure out what to say, he realized that the swordsman was leaving a trail of bloody splotches along the floor as he went; blood was dripping from somewhere beneath the shirt as Kumo walked, and one thin streak traced across his thigh to his ankle, pooling further onto the floor.

"Hey!" Yu cried, feeling cold and worried. "You're bleeding!"

As soon as he'd gotten the words out, Kumo's steps faltered, and he began to fall backwards, letting out a soft muted cry of distress.

And Kaze was there, catching the swordsman in the crook of his arm, trying to support him, keeping him relatively upright.

"I'll take him," he said bluntly, looking to Yu. "Go ahead and tell them that I'm bringing him to the infirmary. He needs help."

Yu nodded breathlessly and dashed off, going as quickly as he could manage without slipping in Kumo's blood.

Kaze looked down at his companion. Kumo's skin was pale except for his face, which was covered in a delicate pink flush. His eyes were half-open and vague, and they didn't seem to see anything. His joints still refused to hold, and so his entire weight rested on Kaze's arm. And still, blood dripped from between his legs, gathering in a little puddle at his feet. Kaze scowled. Kumo should not have been bleeding after all this time. Either he'd done something to reopen the wound (unlikely) or his mind was starting to affect his body. At any rate, it was probably the blood loss that'd made him light-headed enough to faint.

Gritting his teeth, Kaze carefully hoisted Kumo's limp body over his shoulder and started walking. Nothing would be accomplished by simply standing around.

* * *

"He's got a mild fever of 99.6º, and as I'm sure everyone has noticed, he's bleeding quite badly from the rectum. His old wounds should not have reopened at this point, and as far as I know he hasn't been engaged in any further sexual activity that might have caused new ones." The doctor sighed and scratched his head. "As far as I'm concerned, the root of this problem is psychological." When Lisa and Kaze both frowned, he sighed again. "The real problem's not with his body, it's with his mind. He's trying to internalize the trauma of the sexual abuse, but it's too much for him to handle, and so his body chose this outlet for him. How has he been doing for the past few days?" 

Lisa shook her head. "He dreams about it every night. He's been biting his lip open during his sleep, and he tears at his body with his own hands. He'll wake up sweating with some of his old scratches reopened and his lip bleeding very badly. I've tried to take care of him when that happens, but..." She shook her head. "He has to sleep, and he can't stay up every night to avoid this."

"He doesn't talk about it," Kaze added. "He's silent all day."

The doctor shook his head. "Then you're going to have to get him to open up somehow," he said glumly. "He won't get any better until he's resolved the conflict in his mind. Oh, this may improve, but then he'll bounce around from illness to illness... nip it in the bud when he wakes up. Get him to talk about it then. Be firm with him, but don't push too hard for details. Just his getting the general idea of what's happened out of his system will help a lot. I don't have much more advice than that to give you."

Kaze and Lisa exchanged grim looks, then stared back at Kumo. This could turn out ugly.

* * *

It was a few hours before Kumo managed to wake. 

Letting out a soft moan, he opened his eyes a fraction, then rubbed at his face with the back of his hand. At first he tried to sit up, but apparently thought better of it when he realized that he was still bleeding and a pad of bandages had been placed beneath him so that he wouldn't stain the sheets. Instead, he lay back down, closing his eyes and sighing, looking unhappy.

"Good morning," Lisa said softly from beside him.

"Define 'good'," Kumo retorted wryly from where he lay.

She smiled and put her hand on his shoulder. "Well, at least you've still got your sense of humor, such as it is."

One jadeine eye opened, regarding Lisa with a defeated stare. "I _fainted. _And apparently I'm sick. What in the world is wrong with me? First I can't even say 'no', now this...?"

Kaze, sitting on the white-haired swordsman's other side, scowled. "That was not your fault."

"Oh, yes, it was." The eye closed; Kumo shifted, turning slightly away. "No matter what anyone says, it was my fault."

"Why?" Lisa asked. "How could it have been your fault? You were hurt, you were scared, and you were overpowered. And on top of that... it was the choice of the person who did this to you, not yours." She paused, and seemed to think of something. "Wait... Kumo, how long has this been going on?"

The eyes opened again; Kumo gave her a look of utter despair, then turned to face Kaze again. "He was... angry... when he learned that I hadn't killed you when I had the chance..."

Lisa blinked. "You mean... when you fought Kaze at the base of the Comodeen?" She stared, looking more than a little horrified. "That has to have been at least two months ago now...!"

"Who?" Kaze demanded, deep rumbling anger in his voice. "Who did this?"

Kumo crossed his arms over his chest and seemed to retreat a little further into himself. "The Earl," he spoke into the silence after a long pause. "The physical embodiment of Chaos.

"Usually, Chaos takes a form that represents its development and growth of power," he explained, his voice getting fainter and fainter. "But don't let that fool you. If necessary, he can tap the full strength of Chaos, becoming what Chaos truly is... or alter his shape to appear older or younger. Chaos is the age-old enemy... the fiend itself... you must never underestimate it, or... you'll end up like me.

"He called me in that day... he'd taken the shape of an adult human... he had us sealed in... so there would be no way out for me. I didn't suspect. He was angry... he... cursed me, then dealt me... a blow more powerful than I had anticipated... he grew condescending... mocked me...then..." He shuddered. "He... kissed me... told me I was a fool... and then... then..." His voice trailed off, and he shook his head, giving his listeners a dark and haunted look. "He hurt me," he said softly, looking like he wanted to cry.

"Oh, Kumo..." Lisa, unable to help herself, reached out and smoothed his hair, trying awkwardly to comfort him. "Don't you see? This wasn't your fault... you didn't know! You couldn't have known! You never got the chance to fight back!"

"I never fought," Kumo told her with tears in his eyes. "Not once in all that time... I never fought. I couldn't even get up the courage to tell him _no. _I was weak... I never even tried to defend myself... and..." He shook his head. "Like they all said... I deserved it."

"How could you possibly have deserved it?" Lisa cried, still trying to comfort him somehow.

"Because there's something wrong with me," was his reply, spoken in a tiny voice. "Like they all said... that anyone like me should have enjoyed it..."

"They couldn't expect that," Lisa told him firmly. "That monster _raped _you. No one can like an experience like that..."

"But they knew," Kumo said, curling into an implacable ball. "They knew about... about Niisama..."

Gently, Lisa shook his shoulder. "Kumo, I don't understand what that has to do with anything. Please explain to me why their knowing about your brother made any difference in how they treated you."

Kaze sighedwas Lisa imagining it, or did he look a little uncomfortable? "Aura thought so. I wasn't sure, but she guessed..."

Kumo's curl tightened. "You'll hate me too," he said softly, his voice choked with tears.

"It would take a lot to make me hate you," Lisa replied firmly. "Please tell me."

"They knew about... about us," Kumo told her in a tiny voice. "I don't know how they found out... but they knew. They knew that I... that I loved him. Am I sick!" Anguish had twisted his high tenor back into a childish treble. "Is something really... really that wrong with me!"

It finally began to dawn on Lisa, and she drew back, dumbstruck, staring at Kumo in disbelief and maybe even a little revulsion. _Was he talking about **incest**!_

"You cannot change who you fall in love with," Kaze said softly, looking at the distraught Kumo with deep sympathy in his eyes. "There's nothing wrong with you."

_Incest, _Lisa thought weakly, still having trouble comprehending it. _He had an affair with his own brother. How did this happen? Kumo and his brother... I can't believe this. I just can't._

"You aren't mad?" Kumo peeked up at Kaze, his jadeine eyes huge with childish anxiety.

"I'm not," Kaze replied patiently.

Kumo sighed, looking considerably relieved. "I've... loved Kiri-niisama for as long as I can remember," he confessed, the words quiet but tumbling out of him in a rush. "He felt the same way I did... things started to happen, and... we just knew that it was time. We were starting to go through life-bonding when Mystaria... when our world was..." He couldn't say it. Shaking his head, he went on. "Niisama and I, we never... we would have, when the rites were complete, but... we never did. But I, we... had already made our pact that... we vowed to save ourselves, for each other." He covered his eyes with his hand, his voice twisting again. "I broke that vow... my sacred oath to my love..."

Lisa gave herself a mental shaking. _You can deal with your prejudices later; right now this poor boy is suffering because of something that was not his fault and you need to help him. _"You didn't have any choice," she said softly.

_"Chaos _was my first time," Kumo whispered, his words filled with pain. "I betrayed Niisama, and... I am bound to Chaos now..."

"You aren't bound to _anybody,_" Lisa said, alarmed. "You make your own choices about who you love. You hate Chaos because he hurt you and destroyed your world... and you still love your brother. And no matter what you believe, you were forced into this entire thing because you couldn't fight Chaos on your own! Kumo... you aren't alone anymore! You have friends here who will defend you when you can't defend yourself! Kaze and I will protect you, so don't worry about Chaos... he can't hurt you anymore!"

Kumo stared at her. Apparently, that idea had never entered his head.

"Lisa is right," Kaze agreed, his deep hoarse voice stern. "We will never let this happen again." Reaching out, he gently traced a fading bruise on Kumo's cheek. "I know what pain is. And you have lived with it for too long. It's over now."

Kumo gripped Kaze's hand with both of his own and bowed his head, overcome with emotion. When he looked up, there were once again tears in his eyes... but instead of grief, a small smile touched his face. "Kansha suru."

(TBC)


	6. Must Be Dreaming

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

_I must be dreaming or_

_We're on to something_

_I must be dreaming, for_

_I don't fall in love lawlessly_

_I must be dreaming or_

_Pinch me to waking_

_So undeniably yours_

_As long as I am losing it so completely..._

Frou Frou, "Must Be Dreaming"

* * *

Mystaria. Windaria. The two sides of the coin, two halves of the same bipolar world.

The legends said that the realms of the two races were cut off after the great war between them ended; sealed away by the power of the sleep spirits Nallorn and Gaedrian. The barrier was the same that gave the Sky People their homea thick, almost impenetrable wall of clouds. For two hundred and fifty years, there had been peace between the peoples of earth and sky... in other words, they ignored each other almost completely.

The Spiral of Darkness was an object of curiosity that no one really paid attention to, anymore. The two peoples of the wind had grown used to it; after all, it had been there for quite some timeno one knew exactly how long ago it had appeared.

Kaze and Aura were born of the Earth People, living their lives between ground and sky. Kiri and Kumo were of the Sky People, knowing only cloud and stone, free-spirited swordsmen to whom the word _sky _meant the great expanse of blue above them; a realm of endless possibility.

For years, they had no knowledge of each other's existence.

But when the attacks on their world began, all of that quickly changed...

* * *

Crux sat alone in the high alcoves of the huge room, her arms tightly fitted around the red cloak that had once belonged to the madoushi, her dear Kumo's brother.

She had seen every moment of the horror, and it was still engraved in her mind.

Oscha's grotesque true form, Kumo's terrified pleas for mercy, the pitiful state of his body, and, of course, everything that had happened after... Kumo had been brutally beaten, raped, and forced into oral sex. And after he was satisfied, Oscha had just left him there.

Kumo, half-dead and too weak to stand, had dragged himself out of the room, to the castle's exterior... and fallen. She had seen ita thin bolt of white dropping through the gauzy veil of clouds.

She had no way of knowing even if he was dead or alive. Was he still suffering? Had he found solace with someone willing to take care of him? Had he run into further misfortune? She didn't have any idea, and it was driving her out of her mind.

And then she heard it.

Oscha and Herba were heading down Gaudium's halls, apparently deep in discussion over something. Because she was small and in their opinion beneath their time, she was able to listen in undetected.

"He should be with the Black Wind and the rebel army," Oscha was saying, sounding self-satisfied as always. The sound of his voice made Crux's back crawl with revulsion. "Do whatever you like with him, but remember that you must bring him back alive."

The plant-woman laughed. "Of course, Oscha darling. Little Makenshi-chan belongs to His Excellency... and we'll definitely need him back before we try to move Pist's Ocean Puzzle; his power may be too great to contain. Don't worry... I'll see what I can find out first. And just a little passion-flower won't cause too much of a bother... I'll be able to learn what he and my Magun baby are thinking."

_He's alive! Thank God! _Crux felt her joints loosen in relief. Oscha and Herba were heading back out of earshot, but she'd heard what she needed to know. Kumo was alive. And as of now, in danger.

She would have to go out on her own and warn him.

* * *

"Here you go! All done."

Miles, the second-in-command of the Comodeen, held up Kumo's blouse, displaying that every tear and stain had been washed and repaired. She'd finished with most of his uniform already; only his cloak still needed fixing. As Kumo had stopped bleeding just a day ago, he was wearing the clothes he'd gotten back.

"Kansha suru!" Bowing in gratitude, he accepted the shirt, pulling it on. "You're amazing... I could never have done this well with the tears."

"Yeah, well..." Miles shifted and looked at the ground, trying not to smile. She was the best with needle and thread of all the Comodeen, though she didn't really like displaying her 'girlier' side. "Not many people would envy someone's sewing talents."

"Try telling that to me or anyone else whose ability with needles is comprised only of stitching up shallow wounds," Kumo retorted happily.

Miles shook her head wryly and fluffed Kumo's hair. "You're a good kid, you know that?" He smiled, and she couldn't help but give him a crooked verson of the same. "Go on, get out of here. Pester Kaze for me. Go... shoo. I still have work to do." Obediently, Kumo trotted off, the long ribbon fixed to the back of his choker collar trailing after him.

As soon as he was in the hall of the submarine, Kumo let the smile drop from his face. His explosion two days ago had completely exhausted him, and although it did feel good to let everything out, it also brought the pain and shame back to him in full force.

If that wasn't bad enough, he hadn't been so out of it that he'd missed Lisa's reactions to it all. She'd been so sympathetic at firsthe'd seen in her face how much she'd ached for himbut as soon as he'd mentioned his relationship with Kiri, she'd suddenly gone icy, and her pathos from that point on seemed so forced. It had disturbed her deeply; it had cut him to the heart to see the relief on her face when he'd let them know that he and Kiri had never actually made love. Despite Kaze's insistence that his love for his brother was acceptable, he had begun to feel more and more like something was really wrong with him. Seeing Lisa's reaction on top of what Chaos and his Deathlords had been telling him all along had made it worse than ever.

A tap on the glass window beside him shook him out of his thoughts. He turned, unsure of what to expect, and gasped at what he saw.

"Crux!" Hitting a switch on the wall, he pulled down the window to let the little sprite-doll in. Her breathing was rapid, and strands of her pale violet hair were trailing from beneath her heavy helm. Apparently, she'd come straight here from Gaudium, as quickly as she could. Tucking her into his arms, Kumo leaned against the wall, holding her gently against his chest. "Are you alright? What happened?"

"Kuriyu," she tried to get out between shallow gasps for breath. "Ku..."

"Easy," he said softly, looking down at her with deep concern. "Take your time. This place is relatively safe."

Sitting up, Crux held out a dark folded something that she had been clutching all that time. Kumo, uncertain, took it, then stared, his eyes widening in disbelief. "Niisama's..." It was Kiri's cloak. Kumo pressed the deep crimson cloth to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut tightly in pain. "I thought I'd lost it... thank you. But..." He looked up at her, his expression sober and miserable. "You saw, didn't you?" he asked, though he already knew the answer. Crux hung her head, but nodded. Giving her a gentle hug, he chewed his lip, sighing. "I'm sorry. I didn't want you to get involved..."

"Kuuu," she cried, looking indignant.

Kumo shut up, then smiled after a short pause. "I... you're right. I'm sorry."

"Ku," she said with a huff, rolling her eyes.

"I know... I'm sorry."

She shook her head at him, then pressed close to his heart for a moment. While he held her, she told him everything she had overheard, and he listened with grave sobriety.

"Passion flower," he murmured. "It impedes rational thought and provokes the inner desires of the mind. Those who breathe its pollen come under its influence, and are more likely to act on reckless emotion than usual." He frowned. "What's she planning?"

This was a bit of worry for Kumo. Although he took care to preserve a restrained, quiet outward manner, he knew all too well that he had his own violent side. While summoning, while he was most open, he was most in tune with this side; being interrupted while calling the Ittenju not only irritated him but could release that other side. Once, he had attacked Kaze in a fit of temper for interrupting him; he still hated Pist with a bloody, violent, frightening vengeance for humiliating him in the same way in front of the Earl and the other Deathlords. Pist would reap that hatred sooner or later, and Kumo almost pitied him for it. Almost.

When he had first realized he had this darker side as a child, he and Kiri had worked to contain it. Kiri had insisted that it was almost like someone else's soul had gotten mixed up with Kumo's; from that point on, he'd always called the dark side by the name he chose for it, "Sumire". Whatever the case, that dark side was the source of all the hatred and base emotion that Kumo's heart held... and that included sexual desire. The nights he'd awakened abruptly and had to force himself to look away from his sleeping brother, the ache was so bad... Kumo barely kept himself from blushing just thinking about it.

So what would this strange and unpredictable side of Kumo's psyche do, if freed by the passion flower...?

"Kuu?"

He blinked, remembered what he was doing, and shook his head. "It's nothing important." He put his hands on Crux's small shoulders and stared into her eyes. "You've got to get back to Gaudium _now, _before they realize you're gone. If they figure out what you've been doing here, they'll kill you, and you've gone through enough on my account already. I couldn't live with myself if that happened. Please just go."

Crux gave him a forlorn look, then hugged him tightly. "Kuu..."

Kumo's heart tightened painfully. "I know. I know. And I'm sorry that I worry you so much, I truly am. But I can never go back to Gaudium now. I'm expendable to them... and I don't want to be the Earl's toy anymore. Someone needs to tell the little brat that he can't have everything he wants, and it looks like I've been chosen for the role. But you... you're already too involved in all of this. Please just go."

Crux sighed, then left, a tiny streak of color in the large empty sky. Kumo watched her until she was gone, then continued down the hallway to his makeshift room in the infirmary.

Clutching his brother's cloak to his chest, he let the silent storm of tears carry him away.

* * *

"Just one flower should be potent enough to do the trick," Herba said to herself, setting the brilliantly colored seed into the sandy soil. Covering it with loose dirt, she snapped her fingers, and watched the innocent-looking little flower crawl its way up through the sand. "No one will be able to resist it now. I'll know everything... just how to manipulate them in every way possible. I'll show His Excellency that Pist isn't the only one who can make plans.

"My darling little Makenshi-chan, are you going to fall back on old habits now?"

* * *

Kaze slipped into the room as silently as possible, sitting down next to his once-rival's bed.

The past week had been confusing for him. Learning that Kumo wasn't at fault for Aura's death had been shock enough, but his clinging dependence baffled him even further. He felt strange whenever the swordsman was around him... he was unsure of what to say or do in order to keep his composure; just being Kumo's rock to lean on was tough enough. Somehow he'd managed not to get his foot in his mouth yet, but the moment would come, and the damage that might do to Kumo's all-too-fragile psyche haunted him.

Looking more closely, he realized that the little swordsman was trembling violently in his sleep, his hands tight fists on the sheets of his bed, his breath sounding with little whimpers. About to touch Kumo's shoulder to wake him, he realized that the younger man was speaking softly.

"Otósan... Okaasan..." He shuddered, then called out again, louder this time. "Otósan... Okaasan...!" Abruptly, Kaze noticed the tears clinging to Kumo's thick eyelashes, heavy and ready to fall. "Niisama...!" He was all but screaming now, shaking and crying and calling for those long dead. "Niisama! It can't be...! It just can't be...! Okaasan! NIISAMA! No! Please... please, no...!" The tears started to trace down Kumo's cheeks in a salt flood, his cries twisting. "My heart... my heart hurts..."

"Wake up," Kaze said softly, giving the swordsman a rough shake. "Kumo... Shiroi-chan. Wake up."

Kumo's soft jadeine eyes snapped open. Seeing Kaze, he flung himself into the gunner's arms and proceeded to cry his heart out.

Afterwards, Kaze would wonder what in the nine hells had possessed him to do something so crazy and potentially stupid. But at the time, it had seemed reasonable.

Supporting the desolate white swordsman with his left arm, he turned, leaned towards him, and softly pressed his lips to Kumo's tearstained cheek.

As Kaze pulled away, Kumo looked up at him with surprise, his sobs quieting although his breath still hitched and there were still tears in his eyes.

"Kaze..."

One of them must have leaned forward a little, because the next moment, they were tangled up in a mutual embrace, their lips locked together, their hearts a raging storm of emotion.

* * *

Lisa, sighing, stared out the window, feeling a little sulky. She had once hoped to become friends with Kaze, morose as he could be; now, it seemed she was losing all prospect of getting close to him... because he was wrapped up in taking care of Kumo, the young man he had not so long ago wanted to kill.

Kumo, who was still in love with his dead brother.

Lisa was still a little bit dubious about that. She hated the way that she sometimes passed judgement without knowing the whole storythat impeded the growth and power of her Kigen Arts, and without those she couldn't protect the kidsbut the concept of incest disturbed her. She couldn't help being relieved to know that Kumo and his brother had never had sex, but from the other things he'd said and the way he'd said them, it had been a close thing. Although she sincerely wanted to help Kumo, these things made her a little bit... well, uncomfortable.

And this was the man she was losing Kaze to...

Realizing what she was thinking, Lisa blinked, frowned and shook her head. _"Losing Kaze to"? I think I've been reading too many romance novels lately..._

* * *

"At this rate, I doubt if we'll ever get to see Mom and Dad again," Yu said with a sigh, staring out the submarine's window. "I wish we could just get going... Kumo will be staying with us for a while, so I wish we didn't have to wait..."

Ai shook her head. Her brother had been going on in this line for about five minutes now, talking to the glass and completely ignoring her and Chobi, who was prodding the boy's hands with his beak in an attempt to get petted. Sometimes he drove her absolutely insane... and when he got depressed like this, he started to remind her of Clear.

Although she did worry about the older boy, Ai knew that it wasn't healthy to spend all her time moping about it. As a part of Omega, Clear would be able to take care of himselfprobably. Just so long as he didn't wipe out too much of Wonderland before she could give his protective glove back to him. So she didn't like it when Yu got on his tangents and made her think about it more than she should've.

"Come on, Chobi, let's go outside." The chocobo, perking up, followed her over to the hatch, and the two of them stepped off the sub onto sand.

All of the adults had been moody lately. Lisa was staring off into space, Cid was deep in renovating some new invention or other, Miles was brooding, and even Fungo, the youngest member of the Comodeen, was strangely quiet. Kumo was asleep and Kaze had gone off to watch over him. If everyone kept acting so depressed, she was going to scream...

That was when she spotted the little flower poking up out of the sand.

"Huh." Bending down, Ai poked at it. It seemed to be nothing more than a plain, ordinary little flower. It was pretty, to be sure; it looked a little like a miniature tiger lily, but it didn't seem more than that. So, being the twelve-year-old that she was, Ai reached out and pulled it up.

As soon as the flower was out of the sand, it disintegrated into dust, slipping through Ai's fingers like the fine meld of gold and brown she'd pulled it out of. Pouting, Ai made an annoyed noise. "It figures. Just another weird old Wonderland flower." She stomped off around the side of the submarine. "C'mon, Chobi."

* * *

"Kaze... Kaze...!"

Lying on his back on the bed with his clothes half-undone and the gunner leaning over him, it was all that Kumo could do to call out feverishly. His entire body throbbed with the need for oneness, burned with the slow aching fire that Kaze's touch had spread.

"Nnngh... Kaze..."

There would be no interruption this time. If he let this continue, things would tumble out of control, and he and Kaze would... they'd actually do it.

And yet for some reason, he didn't care. Both body and mind screamed desperately for that last barrier to be broken, as if in making love he would finally rinse himself of the taint of Chaos.

"Kaze... ah..."

His mind spun away from him into a realm of heady color and light as Kaze's lips moved against his throat, retracing the patterns that Kiri had forged on that day long ago

Kiri.

The thought of his brother, of long soft crimson hair and gentle carmine eyes filled to bursting with love, stopped the overwhelming heat of desire instantly, replacing it with chill and frost.

Would he break his vow so casually yet again?

Finding control of his hands, he shifted, gained purchase against Kaze's chest, and pushed the gunner away, letting tears spill down his face.

"I can't... I'm sorry, I can't... I can't do this right now!"

Struggling to shed himself of Kaze's weight, he edged away, getting shakily to his feet and fleeing down the corridor, leaving the gunman to wonder if he had done something wrong.

* * *

Miles, humming a random tune to herself, was walking down the hall with the last basket of laundry when Kumo tore up it, straight towards her, his face bright pink and tearstained. Dropping the clothes, she caught him mid-run, forcing him to stand still.

"Are you alright? What's wrong?" she asked, staring. Kumo was breathing hard, distraught, and losing control of his own Mist; a haze of white was rapidly thickening the air around the two of them. "You're all red, and you're covered in sweat. Just look at you." Smiling crookedly, she rubbed the young man's shoulder. "You know what? I think you could use a chance to get clean. Come on, let's go to the shower rooms. If you want, you can tell me about it there. A bath would probably help you right now."

Kumo nodded, half-sobbing, and leaned on Miles' shoulder as she gently coaxed him along.

* * *

With an exasperated sigh, Kaze plunked himself down at the mess hall table. Since it was the middle of the day, no one else was around except Cid, who was sitting across from him and tinkering with some new mechanical creation.

"Something wrong?" the blonde inventor asked, scrubbing sweat off his forehead.

Kaze hesitated for a moment, then decided to break the silence. "I... think I may have made a mistake..."

* * *

Once the bath was full, Kumo slipped out of his clothes and undid his choker, then delicately stepped into the water and sat down. Though Miles had been ready to turn away if Kumo had wanted privacy, he didn't seem to care. Having been forewarned, the violet-haired woman didn't flinch at the sight of the young swordsman's fading bruises, but hissed in sympathy instead. "You look like you're still really hurting."

Kumo shrugged, giving her a smile with a visible effort. "It's not so bad. I've been through much worse in my life than a few bruises."

"I'll bet," Miles replied, handing him a washcloth. "Scrub. You're covered in sweat and you need to get some of those cuts cleaned. Something happened with Kaze, didn't it?"

Kumo paused and looked up at her. "How...?"

"You were alone in there until he went in to check up on you," Miles pointed out. "It wasn't that hard to guess." She frowned and gave Kumo a look. "Was he coming on to you?"

Kumo blinked and stared at her in puzzlement. Sighing, she shook her head and tried to find a different way of wording it.

"You know... did he try to persuade you to do something you didn't want to with him?"

Turning pink, Kumo shook his head. "No! No... it was nothing like that..." His gaze drifted past her, heading for the door. "I... was dreaming about my parents... he woke me and held me and let me cry... I'm not really sure how it happened, but we..." Blushing further, he touched his lips, which were still slightly swelled.

"Ah." Miles nodded. "So you wound up kissing somehow or other. I'm... not all that surprised, you know. Kaze might not act like it all the time, but he cares for you." She patted the young man's shoulder. "I'm guessing that as you were alone and in bed and it was dark, stuff escalated?"

Crimson with shame, Kumo gave a tiny nod. "But... I didn't want to break my vow with Kiri-niisama a second time... I just couldn't." He was too guilt-stricken to tell her the rest of it... how badly he had wanted to stay, until he and Kaze were one forever... and how Kaze had wanted it just as badly.

"You really love your big brother a lot, don't you?" Miles asked, ruffling his hair. "Don't be surprised or scared... I won't hold it against you. You're a good kid, and who you love is your business alone. But I have a question for you... did you ever make love before you started getting abused?" Kumo shook his head. "Do you think that Kaze would hurt you purposely?" Another shake of the head. "And do you think that Kaze would be able to love you, both from the heart and the body, in the same kind of way your brother loved you?" Kumo paused, then gave a shy nod. "Then you don't have to worry about anything. If Kaze starts something that you don't want to continue, tell him _no _and leave. No one can force you to have sex with him, least of all Kaze himself, if he really loves you. Wait until the time _you _think is right, and don't let anyone else decide that for you." She smiled wryly. "Don't worry. Kaze may act like a dumb jerk sometimes, but he's not entirely brainless. Especially after what you've been through, he won't make you do anything you don't want to. Now close your eyes... I'll do your hair for you."

Kumo smiled back and shut his eyes obediently so that Miles could rinse out his soft white hair.

* * *

"So basically, you're worried that you've been coming on too fast?" Cid asked, looking up.

Kaze grimaced. "...Yes." His voice had lost a great deal of its hoarseness; he had talked a great deal more than he had for quite a long time, and his throat was starting to warm up to speech again.

"If Kumo isn't ready yet, you just have to wait until he is," the inventor replied, swiping a cloth across a sheet of metal. "Obviously he cares for you, because if he didn't he wouldn't have let you get that far... but he's probably still too emotionally fragile to do anything like that."

"He said he still had a pact with his brother," Kaze mused.

"Yes, that's probably part of it too. I think he's probably still in love with his brother... even after all this time and the things that happened in the city of clouds. But once he sorts his emotions out, he'll let you know. Don't pester him about it, and don't try to force him to do anything. Considering what he's just gone through, doing that would mean you'd lose him forever."

"I figured that much," the gunman said under his breath, rolling his eyes.

"Just let him decide what the right time is for both of you. If that means you have to hold back when you're around him, so be it. Just let him know that you aren't mad and you're trying to respect his judgement and you'll let him choose what he wants to. Don't pressure him, he'll get angry at you."

"So much advice from someone without a girlfriend," Kaze remarked slyly.

Cid shrugged; Kaze let out a cough that sounded suspiciously like "Miles", but didn't press the matter any further.

"At any rate, just wait for Kumo and try not to do anything stupid while you do," the inventor said, reaching across the table to clap Kaze on the shoulder. "It's all in his hands now."

* * *

"Such a wonderful load of information," Herba gloated to herself. "And now for the blackmail... first, I just need to check on how my little hana-chan is doing!"

But when she approached the spot where she'd planted the passion flower, Herba only found a pile of thin gray dust. She stared at it incredulously, then burst out in a temper tantrum, stamping her feet, waving her arms, and looking not unlike her young employer.

"ARA-! Someone picked my manipulative little hana-chan! Ohhh, they're in for it NOW! They'll see why Herba-chan is called the Poisonous Blossom of Gaudium!"

* * *

Kumo was half-asleep with his head on Miles' shoulder while she finished up the laundry when they heard the explosion.

Along with everyone else, they raced outside.

...And saw a certain flower woman waiting for them, an evil-looking angry smile on her face and pure hatred in her flat red eyes.

"Well, hel_lo _there, my dear Makenshi-chan!" she called. Kumo bristled. "Don't you think you'd better come back to Gaudium now? His Excellency's missing you..."

There was a click, and Kaze's shotgun was pointed straight at her. "He's not going anywhere," the gunner said in a low, threatening tone of voice.

"Why, it's my little Magun baby!" Herba cooed. Kumo and Lisa both twitched. "Aren't you so protective all of a sudden? I _won_der what could have happened to bring the two of you so much closer together..."

"What do you want, you ugly witch?" Miles demanded, her hand at her belt, ready to whip out her panpipe loaded with blowdarts.

"It's simple," Herba said with a sneer. "Hand Makenshi over... if you want to live."

(TBC)


	7. Breaking the Habit

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

_I don't know what's worth fighting for_

_Or why I have to scream_

_I don't know why I instigate_

_And say what I don't mean_

_I don't know how I got this way_

_I'll never be alright_

_So I'm breaking the habit tonight..._

Linkin Park, "Breaking the Habit"

* * *

"It's simple. Hand Makenshi over... if you want to live."

"He's not going anywhere," Cid yelled, helping Knave lift the Comodeen's heavy gatling gun and point it at the flirtatious Deathlord.

"Ah? Death alone isn't enough for you?" Herba smirked. "Then how would you like it if I spilled some of your dirty little secrets to everyone else?"

"We have nothing to worry about!" Knave sniffed, grabbing for the gatling gun's firing mechanism.

"Is that so, Mr. Coward?" The leader of the Comodeen froze. "Always such a macho tough guy as long as he's got his troops around him, but with an absolute _terror _of death... and frogs." Knave purpled and choked out bits and pieces of obscenities while Herba turned towards the next unlikely victim. "And you, Little Miss Tough Girl... always _so _brave, at least up until it comes to a little thing called _love. _You're too afraid to even tell him you like him..."

"Shut up," Miles snapped, crimson-faced, shaking a fist at Herba. "Oh, I oughtta..."

"ESPECIALLY ironic," the Deathlord continued, raising her voice, "because he's the exact same way about you!"

Next to Knave, Cid slapped himself.

"And what about whiny little brats who spend all night crying for their Mommy and Daddy? So tragic... especially when you consider the fact that a certain OTHER little brat is too busy worrying about her BOYFRIEND to even consider her parents!"

"What boyfriend?" Ai snapped while Yu blushed and ducked his head.

"Leave them alone," Lisa yelled, her voice going shrill with irritation. "What right do you have to broadcast others' personal secrets like this?"

"Hey, cutie," Herba replied. "You shouldn't waste your life pining away and being jealous when the one you care about is never going to notice you... with your powers, I'm sure that there would always be a spot open at Gaudium for you... that is, if you feel like it."

Lisa blinked and stared at the Deathlord with a bizarre look on her face, as did almost everyone else (with the exception of Kumo, who was just confused).

"Did she just proposition Lisa!" Ai managed.

Herba shrugged. "Suit yourself..." She turned to Kumo, who still didn't seem to get what was going on. "My, you're getting quite a record, Makenshi-chan, aren't you? First your own brother, then His Excellency, and now my Magun baby. Although... we should really expect as much from a little slut like you."

Kumo's eyes went huge, and as the tears of shame began to fall, he turned and started to run. As he passed Lisa, her hand closed around his wrist in a vicelike grip.

"Don't run away from your problems," she said in a low voice. "Stand up to them."

"Let me go," the swordsman cried, struggling to break her hold. "Let go!"

"There isn't much use in running," Herba cooed, playing with her blossom-shaped parasol. "You can never get away from His Excellency, no matter how far or fast you go. You can't possibly have forgotten that you're his property... and besides, I have this little place surrounded. If you think you're going to fly, there's a storm on the way. You'd never make it to safety... you'd just get hit by lightning." A mass of Herba's plant beasts began to rise from the earth around her, forming a circle around her and cutting the little party off completely from the submarine. "You belong to His Excellency the Earl, and if you don't go back to him now... well, let's just say that Wonderland won't really miss this pathetic imitation of a rebellion."

There was a sharp crack, and Herba flipped up her parasol to deflect the bullet Kaze had fired.

"Whoa there, don't you think you're being a little too hasty? If he doesn't come with me, all of you will die... is that what you want?"

"White Cloud... Shiroi Kumo... belongs to no one," Kaze said firmly, not moving so much as an inch, perfectly ready to fire off another round.

Kumo stopped trying to break free of Lisa's grip and looked over his shoulder at the gunner, half-surprised and half-hopeful.

"Are you really sure you should be defending that man?" Herba asked him, a cruel smile on her face and coldness in her eyes. "After all... he won't stay true to you. It's just in his nature. He can't even stay true to the one he _really _loves... can you, Makenshi-chan?" Kumo flinched. "All those pretty little oaths you swore... but when your body tells you 'yes', your mind can tune them out, can't it? Or else how could you sit so still and behave so well when His Excellency fucked you? _Or, _for that matter... how else could you even so much as _think _of sleeping with my Magun baby?"

As one by one the Comodeen turned to stare at him, Kumo sank to the ground, crimson-faced with shame, looking like he wanted to cry.

"I don't think you should forget that his so-called true love is his own brother, either," Herba went on, unholy pleasure on her face. "Just think about it. Wanting a life-bonding with his own flesh and blood... and he's still not over it, is he? Every single night at Gaudiumthat is, when he wasn't busy getting steamy with His Excellencyall you'd hear is that pathetic screaming... _'Niisama, Niisama'_... It makes me absolutely sick."

Kaze narrowed his eyes and fired a second shot, making everyone jerk in surprise. "Leave or die," he spat, glaring at the Deathlord.

"Your funeral," Herba said with a shrug, and snapped her fingers. "Except for the little prostitute, that is... he's coming with me. His Excellency wants his little _toy _back."

The wave of flowers and cacti advanced. Kaze, scowling, blasted holes in the ranks while the Comodeen shot poisoned darts at nearby targets. Lisa gathered up Ai, Yu, and Chobi, and stood protectively in front of them and Kumo, who was still curled into a shaking ball of white in the sand.

From far off, there was a rumble of thunder.

"Go take care of em, Mister!" Ai shouted as drops of rain began to fall.

"Kaze!" Yu cried at the same time.

As if in response, a chill breeze blew back Kaze's cloak, exposing the heavy gold cylinder on his right forearm as the green jewel embedded in its side began to glow.

The gunner looked down at his ultimate weapon, eyes wide in surprise. "It has moved...!" Getting an expression that can only be described as evil, he swung his arm up in front of him as black blades and a spiraling drill exploded from the cylinder's side. "Soil is my power!"

Lisa bit her lip. Not long ago, she had learned that this weapon, Kaze's seemingly all-powerful Magun, was surprisingly temperamental and no longer responded to his urgings for the triple-barrelled gun to take form. In times of danger, it sometimes went off by itself... but only sometimes. Kumo had told Kaze that the gun was broken, disempowered, and that the gunner could no longer use it of his own free will... but then who _was _controlling the weapon of destruction? It was a mystery she had still to figure out.

"Well, now!" Herba smiled devilishly. "You've finally decided to break out the Magun! This should certainly be interesting..."

Kaze ignored her, pulling three bullets filled with the magical substance known as Soil from his belt. "Sharp Gray... Water Blue... and Crusher White." Apparently, he didn't feel like going through his Soil spiel at the moment. Cramming the bullets into the gun, he leveled it at the horde of plant monsters. "Roar! I summon you... Bismarck!"

And the gun went off in a flash of blinding light.

When the smoke and brilliance cleared, a huge wave was curling around the submarine's ranks, blowing monsters away by the dozen. Cresting its peak was the form of a glowing white whale...

The water died down again. Only a few of the monsters remained.

"You...!" Herba twitched, her hands balling into fists. "Not again! You're ruining my little home-grown babies again!"

Through the rain, which was beginning to turn into a downpour, Kaze glowered at her. "You're next," he said with a snarl, and stabbed a judgemental finger at her. "The Soil charge triad to use on you has been decided!" He pulled out another three bullets, these ones different colors. "Dark Green... Ice Blue... and Virgin White..." Slipping them after the first set, he raised the summoning gun again and pulled the trigger. "Shine! I summon you... Shiva!"

Another blast of smoke and light, through which an icy form flew straight for Herba. Looking bored, the Deathlord held up her parasol, which absorbed the impact, froze solid, and shattered as the Summon vanished.

"Do you really think that's going to work on me twice?" she asked. "You're even stupider than I thought if you do." Her hand moved too quickly for the others to see, and suddenly, Kaze let out a cry of anger and pain, ripping something from his arm.

Lisa frowned further. It looked... almost like the spiral darts filled with deadly poison that had been used in Japan, long centuries ago... but... what purpose would something like that...?

Kaze let out another cry, this one more anguished than the first, and dropped to his knees, shaking. Both Lisa and Kumo were suddenly at his sides, before anyone could see how they'd gotten there.

Kaze's right arm... the arm that supported the Magun... was convulsing violently.

The gunner's face had gone deathly white, sweat was beginning to drench his skin, and his entire body was shaking with his effort to hold his arm still. His normally expressionless face was contorted in agony, and his teeth were gritted tightly while he tried not to cry out.

"KAZE!" Kumo and Lisa screamed as one.

"Ice! Someone get me some ice!" Lisa wailed. "HURRY! It's some kind of strange poison that I've never seen before!"

"Detox is a race against time," Kumo cried, his face matching his hair. "PLEASE!"

Herba laughed. "No matter what you do, it's already too late. I've spent years perfecting my selection of poisons, and that's the deadliest of them all. You'll never be able to save him. He's got about thirty minutes before he dies."

"What's the antidote?" Lisa demanded, her voice going shrill. "WHAT IS IT?"

"Something you'll never get your hands on," Herba taunted. "It's my own blood."

As Lisa tried desperately to soothe Kaze, Kumo stood silently, his head bowed.

"Oooh, what's this?" Herba laughed, planting hands on her hips. "A last-ditch attempt to save his life? You'll never be able to attack me in this storm. The rain will make your Mist instantly dissipate!"

Kumo's long thin blade, the Maken, flipped from its place at the back of its belt, forming a perfectly vertical line above him. Though he did not look up, he pulled two glass bottles of Mist from the longer belt slung at an angle across his thin hips.

"Listen to the eternal instrumental duo," he said in a soft, controlled voice, which rose to a shout as he tossed them both into the air. "Duet of the Arctic Night!"

In a crescent flash, both bottles had been sliced in two, and a pair of long serpentine dragons erupted from their shells, snarling.

"Bring them on," Herba said boredly. "I'm not afraid of you."

Kumo traced the air with one finger, stroking a pattern in the wind like a graceful conductor.

The dragons hissed in acquiescence, and formed a circular pattern just beneath Herba, who still hovered in midair. As they curled together in a perfect sphere, a twisted symbol, some inverted form of arcana, formed in the space between them. The Deathlord let out a cry as her body straightened, rigid and unable to move.

"Wha... what's going on!" she screamed, her boredom quickly becoming terror. "Makenshi! Let me go...! Don't forget where your loyalties lie! You belong with us!"

" 'Makenshi' isn't here right now," Kumo said in a low, feral voice that couldn't possibly belong to him. He gripped the Maken's hilt, flipped the blade into its more powerful broadsword form, and slowly rose to the seal, coming to a stop right before her, then raised his head. His warm and gentle jadeine eyes had hardened, and were glowing in terrible power. "I believe there is something you owe me..." He placed the razor edge of his sword to the side of Herba's throat.

"No... NO!" the Deathlord wailed, her eyes huge in wild fear. "Anything... anything... no...!"

Kumo, deaf to her pleas, made a careful incision right at the vital vein in her throat.

Blood gushed forth into the open palm of his hand, which he closed, gesturing in the air and letting the seal loose.

"The concerto played by my Mist seduces you even now," he whispered, and pointed the blade of his Maken at the twin dragons, who twined together sinuously. "Konzert of the Drawn Sword!" A second arcana, this one white, appeared, and the two creatures fused into one. "Destroy them," Kumo said carelessly, and his creation threaded through the remaining monsters, turning them to bits of dust and pollen that melded with the wet sand. As the dragon disappeared into a fine mist, he touched down and walked smoothly over to Kaze.

Lisa drew back, but Kumo spoke softly to her in the gentle voice she recognized. "Show me his arm." Kaze had passed out not long after Kumo had completed his first summon, though his arm was still gripped with convulsions that were starting to spread to the rest of his body. Lisa pulled back and exposed Kaze's Magun and forearm while the white-clad swordsman knelt and opened his closed hand, letting his fistful of Herba's blood spill over the wound from the spiral dart.

Standing, he looked down at the gunner, who almost instantly went limp, relaxed, the muscle spasms in his arm fading. Lisa peeked timidly up at him, and saw that his eyes were back to normal as well. His face was wet with the rainor was it something else?and his white hair clung to his forehead, cheeks, and the nape of his neck. "He should be alright now," he said softly, his sorrow-filled eyes closing.

And without warning, he collapsed in the wet sand.

* * *

"It's just exhaustion," the doctor said with a sigh of relief, removing his hand from Kumo's forehead. "He should stay in bed for the next day or so just in casehe got soaked, and his clothes are pretty thin, so he might get a cold if he doesn't rest upbut he should be fine."

Knave nodded. "There's no doubt that all of us owe him our lives," he said softly. "And no question any more. He stays with us... for as long as he wants. For now, we should set out again. The Earl only has two Deathlords now, and he'll be preoccupied with this mess for quite a while. We should set out while we can... we've stayed here for too long anyway."

Lisa sighed. So Kumo would be able to stay with them now... she no longer had to worry for his safety... and yet, the side of him she had seen that day frightened her deeply. It was completely alien to what made up the white swordsman's personality... such violence... it was hard to believe such a gentle person could contain such hate.

At the very least, thanks to his efforts, Kaze was still alive. The gunner was lying in the bed next to his swordsman companion, ice packs laid on his forehead and all around his arm, just in case.

Sighing, she headed off. Ai and Yu would need to know about this... and she would have to allay any fears they might have about Kumo's unsettling outburst of violence.

* * *

What awoke everyone was the screaming.

Long, drawn-out, half-sobbing, terrible screams of pain and heartbreak.

Lisa was the first one there, her heart racing in uneven beats, flipping on the lights as she launched into the room, grinding short as the flourescence revealed to her eyes the horrific sight awaiting her.

Kaze, sitting up, was also staring, frozen by shock.

Cid, Miles, Knave, Ai and Yu, even Fungo the little thief boyall of them were soon gathered behind her, staring stricken at the same thing she and Kaze were.

Kumo was sitting up in bed, covers thrown off his shaking body, eyes huge with mingled grief and horror and impending madness, tears coursing openly down his face, his hands held before him, covered in the dark blood he had shed when he had ripped open the insides of his arms and his own chest, tormented by his dreams, his breath ragged, his body covered in black-red blood, his sheets streaked with the same, dark skin and blood beneath his nails.

The screams had been his.

"With my own hands... my own hands..." he whispered. His voice shook so badly that he was hard to understand. "Again... again... I've shed the blood of another again... again... again...!" The word twisted into a wail on the last time, and Kumo clenched his fists, curling and hiding his face behind them, starting to sob raggedly.

For a moment, Lisa was afraid that his mind was already gone, but she knew she still had to try.

She walked steadily towards him, her movements slow, her hands palms up before her. As she approached, he shrank away, his wails taking the form of words again.

"No... no... no...!"

"It's alright," Lisa said softly, trying to get comfort into her words. "It's over now, it's over, it's okay now, okay..."

Still speaking, she gently gripped his wrists and pulled his hands away from his face, transferring his right wrist to her left handhis wrists were slender enough for her to cover them both with one hand, making her job much easieras she reached out and tilted his chin up, making him look straight into her eyes. "Kumo. What do you see?"

His eyes traced over her face as he trembled and panted and cried. "Lisa," he said softly, uncertainly.

"That's right," she told him, stroking his cheek and pushing errant strands of white hair from his eyes, making soothing sounds. "That's exactly right. Just look at me now. Me and nobody else. Try to hold on... do your best to hold on. You need to come back. I know it's scary and painful and you don't want to, but if you go away from us now you'll never be able to find your way back to us. Come back, little Kumo, little one, little love, it's okay, we're here, we're all here for you..."

Slowly, Kumo's trembling abated, and the flicker of insanity left his eyes. "Lisa... I..." Fresh tears began to trace down his cheeks. "I killed again... I took life away with these hands, my own hands... dear Gaedrian... what... what have I done...?"

"There was no other way," Lisa told him gently. "It's painful, but you did what you had to, and you saved Kaze's life. Your hands didn't just take life away, they gave it too... it's so sad that the world must work this way, that life has been so cruel to you, but little one, you did what you had to, and you saved someone. The wrong is balanced by the right you did."

"I'm a murderer," Kumo cried, leaning into Lisa's embrace. "I've... taken life with my own hands more than once... I can't... nothing can excuse this...! Niisama... Niisama... what's happening to me...?"

As blood and tears soaked through her dress, Lisa made soft soothing noises, pressing her lips to Kumo's silken hair. "Just cry, baby, just cry... get it out of you... let it leave you... look it in the face and let it go... let go and live..."

The watchers looked on, respectfully silent, still slightly in shock. All of them could plainly see that Lisa was in her element hereshe held Kumo in a firm and warm embrace and spoke to him like a mother to her child, holding his trembling body as though she was all that held him together.

_I wonder if Kumo wants his mom and dad as much as I wish I had mine, _Yu thought to himself, feeling his heart twist. Looking to his sister, he saw that she was thinking the exact same thing, and gripped her hand. _At least Sis and I have each other..._

"I'll go get the doctor," Knave said quietly. "Those scratches will need treatment..."

Kaze stood, his heart in his eyes, and walked over to Kumo's bed, placing a hand on Lisa's shoulder. As the black-haired woman pulled back, he sat and coaxed Kumo towards him, catching the swordsman's lips with his own, giving him a long, soft, tender kiss.

Although the sight of it caused something to jerk unpleasantly in Lisa's heart, she rubbed Kumo's shoulder consolingly when Kaze withdrew.

Drawing and releasing one long, shaking breath, Kumo looked at himself. "What happened?" he asked in a small voice. "What happened to me...?"

"Your pain was too great for you, even in your sleep," Lisa said gently. "You've scratched yourself while you were having nightmares before, but this was the first time it happened like this. We need to get these cleaned and bandaged, and... Kumo, if it's alright with you, for the next few nights I think we should bandage your hands... that way, you won't be able to cut yourself like this."

Kumo nodded, subdued. His sobs had quieted, his breathing was back to normal with the occasional hitch, and his shaking had almost stopped. It was hard to believe that he had been teetering on the brink of insanity barely a few minutes ago.

"No matter what you have done," Kaze said softly, leaning in so that his lips brushed Kumo's cheek, "I will always love you."

"You mean that?" Kumo asked him in a tiny voice.

"I always have loved you. I loved you when I awakened, and you were all I could remember. I loved you while I thought I hated you. I loved you even when I believed that you were responsible for the death of my sister. I loved you when I saw you hurt and alone, afraid of me. I loved you when you shed the blood of another to save my life. I loved you when I thought you had gone mad with grief. I love you now, and will love you always. Always and forever."

Curling between Kaze and Lisa, Kumo sighed, looking tired, and closed his eyes, relinquishing consciousness for the dreamless sleep of absolute exhaustion. Lisa let out a sigh of pure relief, and Kaze looked down at his charge with obvious affection.

And the submarine moved on, bringing the little party closer and closer to its destination.

(TBC)


	8. Surrender

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

_I'd surrender everything_

_To feel the chance to live again_

_I reach to you--I know you can feel it too_

_We'd make it through_

_A thousand dreams I still believe_

_I'd make you give them all to me_

_I'd hold you in my arms and never let go_

_I surrender..._

Celine Dion, "I Surrender"

"We're almost to the end of the ocean," Cid said happily, heading down to the mess hall. He'd put the submarine on autopilot so that he could go and get some semblance of breakfast. "At this going rate, we'll reach Teros in no time at all!"

Kumo, who'd been resting in the main hall with his head on Kaze's shoulder, opened one eye to follow the inventor's progress; when Cid was out of sight, he closed it again and snuggled a little closer to the black-clad gunner. It had been a few days since his brush with madness, and he was recovering as quickly as one could expect, but the strips of linen that bound his chest and arms still peeped from the wide-cut neck of his blouse and under his sleeves. There had only been one "scratching" episode since, but Lisa still bandaged his hands every night just in case, ensuring that he wouldn't do any further damage.

Kaze himself was sleeping, his face still turned slightly towards Kumo, his expression blank and peaceful. There was now obvious affection in the glances he shot the swordsman, just as much as the obvious gratitude that Kumo looked at him with in return. However, nothing had happened between them other than the occasional kiss on the cheek; Kumo was still skittish about going any further and Kaze had decided not to push the issue.

Lisa, who was currently looking after the twins in the mess hall, could not help but be glad for that. Every time she saw Kaze's lips pressed to the swordsman's cheek, she felt heartsick with jealousy. She hated herself for it, but she couldn't help her feelings nonetheless. She had no reason to begrudge Kumo the small amount of comfort he dredged from Kaze's affection, but she still had to look away when she saw the two of them together. Some part of her still wanted to be in that place, receiving the loving glances that Kaze shot the little swordsman, allowed to rest against his side.

But neither Kaze nor Kumo seemed to have any idea of her secret feelings, so Lisa couldn't complain. She didn't know what would be worse--the pain of conscious rejection or the coward's way of aiming sad faces at Kaze's back, lamenting her unworthiness to herself. She did know, however, that she didn't want to make Kumo even more miserable by letting him feel that he was taking her place.

Just as Kumo was about to go to sleep, there was a distant rumble, and the sensation of dropping. Both he and Kaze snapped into alertness and leaped up, but had to brace themselves against each other and the bulkhead behind them, learning to their displeasure that the dropping wasn't just a sensation.

"Pist," Kumo murmured under his breath. The Ocean Puzzle had shifted once again.

Cid came charging in, hanging on to the guiderail along the hall. "What's going on!"

Knave, sitting at his post at the radar and weapons controls, turned. "Cid! We're in the sky!"

"Again!" The blonde inventor dashed up to the cockpit and took his seat, firing off the engines in an attempt to slow their descent. "Hold on tight, everybody!"

There was a resounding crash as the submarine hit some hard surface, and a jolt and tilt, but the craft stayed where it had fallen.

Kumo, opening his eyes, let out a sharp gasp, starting to shake.

They'd landed on a large, vaguely organ-shaped creation with a motley assortment of mismatched eyes. There were three more of them; each was a well-programmed defense satellite that served the purpose of defending the mammoth structure in the center... a gray-and-black castle held up in midair, a structure of nightmares.

Kumo sank to his knees, still trembling violently, as Knave ordered the soldiers to prepare, then fire the submarine's main cannon. Predictably, the huge missile only worked so well--the defense system annihilated it when it got too close to its target. The Comodeen's weaponry might work against monsters and lower-class enemies, but this defensive force was completely out of the rebel army's league.

"I think we should give the main cannon one more try," Miles was saying, but Cid cut her off.

"Wait. It seems like we're safe for now because these defense satellites can't fire at each other directly. Since they protect the structure in the middle, we won't be able to attack, but while we're safe, we should take some time to figure out a new plan."

Miles, who'd been staring the entire time, nodded. "You're right! You're absolutely right." She turned and fixed Knave with a piercing glare. "Well, don't _you _think so, Knave?"

The leader of the Comodeen, taken slightly aback, turned to give his opinion. Kumo shook his head and lost the thread of the conversation, unable to believe any of it. What in the world were they planning this time? There had to be some logical explanation... aside from the obvious... but...

Kaze, frowning, shook Kumo's shoulder. "What is it?"

Shaking his head, he looked up into his friend's cerulean eyes. "We have to get out of this place, _now. _I don't know what the Comodeen hopes to accomplish here... but if we stay here for much longer... everyone will die. Trust me... we _must _get out of here."

Kaze turned towards the others, then looked at Kumo, an unsure expression on his face.

As he was about to speak...

"KWAIIIII!"

Both of them turned to see that Chobi the chocobo was running around frenetically, flapping his short wings and tossing his head.

"What's the matter, Chobi?" Lisa asked, trying desperately to track the bird's movements.

Yu touched the yellow-tipped penna feather he wore in his hair and then spread his hands wide. "He says he smells Dead Peppers and he can't take it anymore!"

"Dead Peppers...?" Lisa began, chewing a nail.

Ai nodded. "Remember? We saw them in that one big weird mansion... they look like big red peppers. Super spicy..."

"Where could a smell like that be coming from?" Lisa mused to herself, then gasped.

Chobi had activated the Ciel powers of the special collar he was equipped with. Armored plates took shape over his body, extending his wings. With a raucous squawk, he headed straight for the glass panels of the front windows.

"No, Chobi, don't!" Yu began to protest, running in front of his pet.

But even that wouldn't stop the Dead-Pepper-crazed chocobo. Instead, Chobi grabbed Yu in his strong talons and went straight through the glass.

"Chobi, no!" Lisa yelled.

"Oh, Yu!" Ai wailed.

"Heeeeeellllp meeeeee!" Yu cried as Chobi dragged him away.

The chocobo was headed straight for the structure in the center of the defense system, expertly dodging the beams that were shot by the satellites.

Kumo cursed under his breath in the ancient language of his people, then sprang up. "I know this place--I'll go after them! DON'T follow me, it's dangerous here!" He sprinted towards the hole in the glass and leaped out, catching the breeze and diving towards the castle, flipping and twisting to avoid the beams that the satellites shot after him. Touching down, he ran into the entrance hall of the mammoth structure, over to the wall, and to the interface located there. He placed his palm on the scanner and spoke in a terse voice. "I'm back. Deactivate defense system." The mechanism beeped, hissed, and followed his command. Sighing, Kumo ran forward again, only to realize that the path was blocked.

By Oscha.

"Let me through," he said with clenched fists and gritted teeth.

"Why, welcome back, my dear Makenshi," the necromancer cackled, offering a wiggling bow, his boneless body bending unnaturally low. "You have been quite busy, I see."

Kumo growled. "Don't play games with me. Where is he!"

Oscha chortled, dropping the act. "The young man who just 'dropped in' is paying a visit to His Excellency. I have been told to let no one interfere... not even you, I'm afraid."

"If you lay so much as one _finger _on him...!" Kumo nearly shouted. "If so much as _one hair _on his head is harmed, all of Gaudium will pay!"

"Let the demon loose," Oscha taunted. "It will do you good, you know. I know what lurks in the depths of your mind, for I saw it not very long ago. You fear to kill because you fear that you will enjoy it... you fear because you already have blood on your hands..."

Kumo's eyes narrowed slightly, but as Sumire's wrath raged through his blood, he caught a flash of Herba's terrified face, conjured out of memory. He shook his head and slowly unclenched his fists, but kept glaring.

"I will shed no blood unless I have a good reason to," he said quietly.

"And your brother? What was your reason for that?"

Kumo hissed in pain, but closed his eyes and answered. "His will was not his own. He had lost the power... that made him Madoushi, and he'd lost his heart and mind beneath your torture. Behind the madness in his eyes, I... saw a flicker of what he had been, begging for me to free him." Opening his eyes, he stared at Oscha, the clarity of compassion in his eyes. "He begged me to die, and I... I killed him because I love him."

Falling silent, he walked straight past the necromancer, knowing that Oscha would not be able to touch him now.

Oscha stared after him as he went, twitching a little in irritation. Kumo, who was usually so susceptible to his lures, had proved completely invulnerable to his probing. A faint glow shone from the swordsman's back as he turned a corner and disappeared from view, trailing warm flecks of light behind him.

This was not good...

---

Chobi was located in the section of the castle that had once been considered Herba's garden, beneath a giant tree whose twisted yellow branches bore huge, twisted spicy fruit known as Dead Peppers. The little chocobo was still running around, but this was because he had already consumed a few of the things and was working on another one.

Kumo sighed, flexed his hands, walked forward, and grabbed Chobi by the collar. "No more of these," he said sternly, slashing the tree itself with his Maken. "They aren't good for you. And besides... you have something to do here." Chobi looked up at him and made a pathetic noise from around the big pepper stuffed in his mouth. "You have to lead me to Yu, and we need to get him out of this place. It isn't safe. ...And you might as well finish that as we go. You'll need all the energy you can get..."

---

Chobi led the way straight into the Chaos chamber, where Yu was standing on the bridge over the huge abyss with the Earl and the two scientists Oscha had always referred to as the patissiers. With a squawk, the chocobo swooped down, grabbed Yu by the arm, and flew off again.

"FLY!" Kumo shouted, just behind him. "NOW!"

Yu was shouting too. "No! I--no! Mom! Dad! Help me!"

Looking over his shoulder, Kumo saw that Earl Tyrant wore a very unpleasant smirk on his face... the kind of self-satisfied look he'd always worn whenever the two of them were alone and he was going to be exceptionally rough. It made his back bristle with jarred nerves, and he murmured to Chobi to hurry up.

As the two of them broke away, Kumo braked hard in midair as he realized that the defense satellite that bore the submarine was the only one remaining, and was moving steadily towards the castle.

"You have gotta be joking," he murmured to himself. Noting that Chobi had made it inside, he nodded, then called out to them. "STOP WHERE YOU ARE!"

"Get on," Cid's voice replied, magnified by some sort of loudspeaker. "We've got to storm this big ugly thing while we're here!"

"NO!" Kumo shouted back, alarmed. "IF YOU COME IN HERE, YOU'LL DIE! JUST STAY WHERE YOU ARE... AND TRUST ME."

With that, he released his Maken and pulled a bottle of Mist from his belt.

"All things ride on my beautiful song..."--he tossed the bottle, letting his voice rise from whisper to shout--"and be off!" As the dragon erupted from the glass, he let out a loud cry. "Nocturne of the White Heat!"

The dragon he'd summoned coiled tightly around the satellite, plunging its swordlike muzzle into the depths of the creation. The resulting explosion destroyed both satellite and dragon, sending the submarine flying. Cid or someone else fired a few jets, and there was a time-space distortion which carried Jane and its crew out of the Ocean Puzzle cube.

Sighing, Kumo put his sword away. The difficult stage of his plan was almost over...

---

Pist, the shark-lord of the ocean and one of the two remaining Deathlords, stood in the inner sanctum of his castle, with the mechanism that controlled the Ocean Puzzle before him. "These guys are becoming quite a pain," he said lightly. "I think I'll let them wander in the Ocean Puzzle for eternity! Oh, Ocean Puzzle, move again if you will... with the exponential growth of Chaos, it appears that something big is going to happen at any moment!"

Whirling, the blue shark-man pulled out his water pistol and shot three blasts. Kumo, who'd been hidden in the shadows, sliced all of them in half.

"I've been waiting for you, Makenshi!" Pist crowed.

Kumo, however, decided to skip the pleasantries. He lunged forward in a graceful leap, cleaving Pist's body in two and touching down delicately a few feet away. Already knowing what would happen, he looked over his shoulder and watched as the two halves of the body liquified and fused together, letting Pist reform. "Ah... you weren't serious when we last fought, were you? But you see... I've already forgotten all about death and dying! Imagine, trying to kill someone like me, who's made of liquid! I'll stay the same no matter how many times you slice me!"

Kumo gave Pist a get-on-with-it look and shifted his grip on his sword hilt.

"I'm afraid, however, that you're already too late. I've recovered every piece of Omega, and they're already being sent to His Excellency!"

Unable to restrain himself, the swordsman let out a soft gasp.

"Surprised? I saw through that little plan of yours long ago! All the pieces of Omega are on their way, along with enough Flying Water to contain them... for as found during our little escapade with Clear, Flying Water and Omega's power repel each other, and when combined, their different functions will neutralize each other, rendering Omega completely helpless! So no matter what you try to do, it's already too late! Any last words?"

Kumo tried to bite his tongue, but for the first time in years, he just couldn't help himself. "Yeah, three things. One, the sun does not shine out of your butt, no matter how much you think it does. Two, for the few months I have been stuck with you, you have been an extremely annoying and equally extremely temporary pain in the ass, and I reeeeally hate you. And thirdly..." He pulled a Mist bottle from his belt and uncapped it, letting the vapor trail out. "You really have always talked too much, ya know?"

Pist twitched, looking as though he couldn't believe that shy, gentle, reticent Makenshi had actually just said all that. After a moment, though, he recovered himself. "Oooh, what's that? An empty bottle, _oooh. _Looks like you've finally gone mad!"

Kumo ignored him and let out a soft breath of Mist, feeling a terrible power begin to grow behind his eyes, flowing through him and towards the arrogant little sonofa...ahem that was standing obstinately before him.

As trails of Pist's essence began to gravitate towards the bottle, he started to protest. "Ey... ey! Whaddaya doin'? Ah... Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

Within instants, Pist's entire being had become Mist. Kumo recapped the bottle and ignored the indignant squeaking that seemed to come from it, smiling. He felt better than he had for a long time.

"Play it, Pist!" He tossed the bottle into the air. "The Rhapsody of Innocence!"

A blue-green dragon erupted from the shattered glass and careened straight for the Ocean Puzzle's controls, obliterating the entire mechanism. Kumo's smile grew. He knew that he'd just completely ruined Pist's plans, including those of the incomplete Omega shipments. Now it would be a whole lot harder for Chaos to reassemble the creature of helpless destruction.

And besides...

"That felt so good," he said serenely as he headed back to Gaudium.

---

"Hey..."

Crux looked up from where she'd been sitting, shocked at hearing Kumo's familiar voice. She'd been deep in thought on his favorite precipice of the castle's exterior, and he was the _last _one she'd expected to see.

"I came for you," he told her gently, his sweet smile both on his face and in his voice. "Do you want to come with me? You'll never have to see this place again... we're getting out of here."

With a squeak, she leaped into his arms, hugging him tightly. "Kukuriyu!"

"I'm glad," he told her, and stood. But as he began to walk away, a presence behind him made him whirl defensively.

"Now, you didn't think that we would actually let you get away with all this, did youuu?"

Oscha.

Kumo backed up a step, starting to feel uncertain. He was pretty sure that he would be able to get away from Oscha now, but that might mean leaving Crux behind... and he could never do that, not when it would mean certain death for her. But if he stayed... he shuddered at the thought.

Just as Oscha began to move forward...

There was a flash of red, and a ball of pure crimson flame appeared in the air.

Kumo blinked, his eyes widening. Was it really...?

A faint form began to flicker around the ball of fire, and as its eyes caught his, he felt time crumble around him.

_"Kumo..." He sensed warm arms fold around him, picked up the scent of firespice, and nearly fainted out of shock. "Thank the fates you're all right."_

_"Niisama... Kiri-niisama!" Kumo stared up into his brother's loving crimson eyes, feeling the world spin around him. "How... how is this...?"_

_"We're inside your mind for now," Kiri explained, kissing Kumo on the cheek. "On the outside, I'm only a spirit with no body, but I have the strength to hold that bastard off while you escape. For now... we have a little time to talk to each other, and I want to make use of it... to tell you just how sorry I am. Sorry for everything that happened before..."_

_"It wasn't your fault," Kumo replied, hugging his brother tightly._

_"I know, but I still feel partially responsible," Kiri admitted, sighing. "And after everything that's happened... I'm just sorry I haven't been here to protect you like I should be. You've had to go through a lot of horrible things, and you've survived all of it. You are _so _strong, and I... I am _so _proud of you." He gave his brother a sad smile. "Look at you. My baby brother is almost all grown up."_

_"I'm sorry," Kumo said softly. "I... I broke our pact..."_

_"Ohh..." Kiri hugged him tightly. "Kumo-chan, that wasn't your fault! That's these stupid people, who think the best use for one's manhood is to stick it where it doesn't have permission to go. Like this blowhard here. The first thing I'm gonna do once you're safely away is burn his off." The corner of Kumo's mouth twitched, and he barely stifled a laugh as he imagined it. "And that's just for starters. This guy is going to rue the day he even fantasized about messing with you."_

_"That's not what I meant," Kumo began. "Kaze--"_

_"Kumo, look at me," Kiri said quietly. "You can't spend the rest of your life tied to me. I will never have the chance to come back to you after this, to love you, to hold you, to kiss you, or... anything else. I'm already gone. You shouldn't live waiting forever at a door that isn't going to open. Part of you knows this. You love me, and you will always love me... but you love Kaze too. I don't know him personally, but from what I've seen, he's an okay guy, just a little confused. He deserves a chance with you. You deserve a chance with him." He traced the rune beorc, for new beginnings, on Kumo's forehead. "I hereby release you from our vows of chastity."_

_"But--" Kumo squeaked._

_"No buts," Kiri interrupted. He smiled. "Baby, can't you see that I'm doing this because I love you? You need to live. Don't waste the rest of your life mourning for me. And none of this 'it just isn't done' stuff. We do what isn't done all the time. Go. Be with Kaze. You need him now."_

_"But I still..." Kumo looked up at his brother with pleading eyes. "I still love you... and you're... I can't just forget about you..."_

_"You won't," Kiri said gently, touching Kumo's chest. "As long as your heart is still beating, I will still be alive in you. I will experience all you do, and see what it's like to live and to love and to dream for a future. If you can't live for yourself, remember this, and live for me." His smile faded, and sorrow came into his eyes. "You've been through so much pain in sixteen years. I know, because... this pain that you've been running from... I have felt it too." Kumo stared, his eyes going wide with shock and horror. Kiri grimaced. "He couldn't force me to hurt you, and so he forced my mind from me with the worst he had. He broke me, heart and spirit, by what he did... but he couldn't break you. Live, my little love. Live and remember, and look to the future."_

_"Kiri..." Kumo held his brother tightly. "I... I'm sorry you had to go through that."_

_"Yeah, well, I'm sorri_er_," Kiri said simply, smiling crookedly as he hugged Kumo back. "I'm three years older than you. You're still young... in my eyes, you really are still my baby brother. He is a sick, sick freak if he got off on hurting someone sweet and innocent like you." He leaned in and kissed Kumo, tasting the soft sweetness that had always been his brother's world. Kumo deepened the embrace and the kiss, but both of them stopped just shy of letting it escalate into something else. It was Kiri who broke their contact, stepping back. "Now, I want you to tell Kaze that if he ever, _ever _tries to hurt you or make you do something you don't want to, I am gonna have his ass on a platter and his charbroiled manhood in the fireplace." Kumo smiled, and Kiri gave his brother a cheeky grin. "Make absolutely sure you tell him."_

_"I will."_

_Kiri rested his hand on his brother's chest again. "I love you." He smiled. "And one last thing..." He let his hand slide down Kumo's body until it rested between his legs. Kumo tensed, letting out a soft hiss of breath. Kiri's grip was gentle, but all the same... to have his love's hand there was... erotic. "The next time someone touches you here... will be our decision." He leaned forward and kissed Kumo one last time on the lips, then stepped back, separating the two of them. "Now... run."_

And Kumo flickered back into reality as the flame of Kiri's soul cast his astral projection. With one last look at his brother, he breathed out a steady stream of Mist, tightened his grip on Crux, and slipped through the series of dimensional barriers that made up Wonderland.

---

"Look," Lisa whispered faintly as an orb of Mist began to form just above the nose of the submarine. As everyone stared (except for Ai, Yu, and Chobi, who were in the mess hall), the soft whiteness dissipated, revealing an exhausted-looking Kumo, who was holding Crux tightly in his arms.

"He's alive!" The Comodeen rushed to open the hatch for him, pulling him inside, ushering him to the main room.

"Barely," Kumo joked weakly. "I think I need to sit down." His entire body was trembling just slightly, just enough to worry Lisa. One of the footsoldiers dragged in a chair, which Kumo immediately collapsed into. "The good news is, the Ocean Puzzle has been destroyed, and you've got one less Deathlord to worry about." There were cries of amazement, but Kumo held up one hand to quiet them. "The bad news is that my cover is officially blown."

"What do you mean?" Knave asked.

"As all of you know... I lost my world to Chaos years ago, and everyone I loved died with it," Kumo said grimly. "I heard some things, and... all this time, I've been staying with the Earl and his Deathlords to try to figure out what in the world is going on here. I had to pretend to go along with their schemes, no matter what it meant for me... as you well know. They're the ones responsible, all right... the Earl is the physical embodiment of Chaos itself. Chaos grows stronger by absorbing negative emotions and feeding off the worlds that are attacked and destroyed by the Deathlords. Originally, I'd planned to kill Chaos even if it meant my own death, but... it's just too powerful. I can't do it alone."

"Then let's fight against it together," Cid said happily.

Kumo shook his head, pain in his eyes. "No... even all of our power combined would be nowhere near enough. He's been feeding off all of us for too long." He turned towards Kaze. "You were... from the beginning, you were the only one with a chance. But the Magun is... and anyway, every time either of us summons, Chaos turns the energy released into its own power. All we can do now is run and hope." Closing his eyes, he bowed his head. "Maybe there's some way to defeat Chaos that I have overlooked, but it's a slim chance. We can't stay in the same place... once you recover what you need to, you should get out of here. Get as far away as you possibly can. I've seen horrible things happen to others just like you... I don't want those tragedies repeated."

Lisa put her hand on Kumo's shoulder. "At any rate, you should rest. That last challenge was hard on you, too... just sleep. And... who's this?"

Kumo smiled. "Her name is Crux. She was... created by the Deathlord Oscha to spy on you, but... she's a friend of mine. I couldn't just leave her there... they'd kill her to spite me."

"We'll take care of her too," Lisa said softly, ruffling Kumo's hair. "Just go to your room and get some sleep."

---

Deep in the night, Kumo rose from his curtained-off section of the infirmary and steeled himself, slipping out and down the hall towards Kaze's room.

The gunner, sitting on his bed and looking out the porthole window, still had a small light on, and turned with some surprise when Kumo opened the door.

"Hey," the swordsman whispered, suddenly self-conscious. He closed the door behind him and bolted it, coming to sit beside Kaze. Although he tried to remain outwardly calm, wave after wave of panic was crashing through his body. He'd been relatively sure of himself when he'd gotten up, but now the semblance of confidence was shredding, turning him into a nervous wreck. Could he really do this?

"Are you alright?" Kaze asked softly.

Kumo smiled wryly. "Funny thing is, I am. I kill my brother and I start contemplating suicide. I kill Herba and I nearly go insane. I kill Pist..." He shrugged. "Bizarre as it is... I just feel wholly, incredibly, soul-deeply cleansed."

Kaze made some odd noise between a snort and a cough, biting his lip to keep from smiling (though he was obviously failing).

"I haven't seen you do that for a while," Kumo said softly, smiling sadly.

They were silent for some time.

Kumo clenched and unclenched his hands in order to keep from chewing his nails. _This is it. I am going to count to three, and then I am going to pop the subject. ...Three._

Not allowing himself to continue the mental debate, he leaned over and gently, shyly kissed Kaze on the lips. Pulling back, he spoke, feeling his voice start to gel. "I... I love you."

Kaze kissed him back. "I love you too."

Kumo felt almost dizzy with relief. There. They'd actually said it. "Kaze... I've been... released from my pact with my brother." The gunner's left eyebrow formed a perfect brown arch. "If you want to... I, we... can make our own pact. If... if you want to..."

"Yes." Once again, Kumo felt himself melt in gratitude. "Now...?"

Eyes shining, Kumo nodded, unsheathing his sword, which he'd brought even though he'd left his Mist belt back on his bedside table. "All we need to do is slit our palms and let our blood mix." The pact of the body--the hardest of all to break and the one least-used. He and Kiri had decided to go through a ceremony and then reinforce it with the other two pacts, but with Kaze he could only truly utilize this one. Carefully, he swiped the palm of his right hand across the blade of the Maken. A cut opened quickly and cleanly, dripping bright blood. Kaze obligingly took the glove off his left hand and held it out, allowing Kumo to do the same to him. Once that was done, Kumo matched up their wounds and clasped Kaze's hand tightly. The cut seared, throbbed, and went dead.

"That's it?"

Kumo nodded. "That's it." He released Kaze's hand, suddenly shy again. "We're bound by blood." Looking at his palm, he saw that the cut had healed, leaving only a white, old-looking scar. He knew without looking that Kaze bore a similar one.

Kaze put an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Kumo wanted to know.

"Being an ass."

He smiled. "You couldn't remember, silly. It wasn't your fault."

Kaze leaned down to kiss his cheek, but Kumo turned up and caught it on his lips. His heart was hammering and his rational mind screaming at him, but he knew. Now. It had to be now. Though Kaze tried to pull back, surprised, Kumo caught him by the upper arms and kept him there. The kiss deepened, and Kaze's protective arm around the swordsman's shoulders slipped to just a hand on Kumo's back for support.

Warmth. Safety. Once, Kumo had wondered if he'd ever feel those things again. But now, the world was lit by the soft flicker of a lamp, and they were hidden miles and miles beneath the water's surface, and he loved the one who was holding him closely. He did feel safe and warm. Here, on the craft belonging to his friends and allies. Playing tongues with Kaze.

Kaze finally managed to pull a few inches away. "You're ready?"

Kumo nodded. "Yes."

Kaze looked at him with some concern. "You're sure?"

Kumo nodded again. "Yes."

They'd already managed to get somewhat diagonal, and somehow Kaze's cloak and Kumo's blouse had been lost. Now, while Kumo fumbled with Kaze's shirt and vest, the gunner was busy toying with the hem of Kumo's thin cloth pants. He got those and the thin choker made of ribbon off just as they went horizontal; Kumo had finished with Kaze's clothes and was busy taking off his steel collar and undoing his long horsetail.

Kaze kissed the side of Kumo's throat, feeling the swordsman's pulse throbbing through his lips. "I love you, Shiroi-chan."

Another wave of panic rose in Kumo's heart. "Kaze... Kaze...?"

With an effort, Kaze pulled back and looked at him questioningly; they were naked and tangled along the bed, Kumo on his back with his legs spread and facing up, Kaze carefully fitted over him looking down. Just a little more maneuvering, and... Kaze blocked the hentai thoughts from his mind, speaking. "What?"

"Kaze, I'm scared."

Kumo's eyes were huge and frightened, filled with the panic raging through his blood. Very suddenly, Kaze remembered that Kumo was just sixteen years old... and that even at such a tender age, he'd been brutally raped over and over. His previous experiences with sex had all been painful and terrifying; it was a wonder he'd even consented to this at all.

"What are you afraid of?" Kaze asked softly.

"I-I... I just don't want it to hurt..."

Kissing him gently on the cheek, Kaze replied, "I could never hurt you." He looked down at Kumo with love in his eyes. "If you start to feel pain, tell me, and I'll stop."

Kumo closed his eyes and nodded. When he opened them again, the look on his face told Kaze that he'd resolved himself. "I trust you," he whispered.

They kissed, and shifted a little, and kissed again. When they were ready, they knew.

_The next time someone touches you here... will be our decision._

Kumo cried out as a brief flash of red flickered through his body, bringing pain in its wake. A moment later, Kaze shuddered; he felt it, too. But just as quickly, the hurting ended. As he felt Kaze's gentle movements within him, Kumo let out a low moan and arched his back inwards. This was actually...

He gasped as ecstasy suddenly raged through his blood, crying out, the rhythm of his breathing starting to roughen. "Kaze...!" It was as though his soul had been torn out of his body, to merge with that of the one he loved. "Kaze... nnh..."

He had never known that it could make him feel so... free.

With the second wave of pleasure, he lost his words.

Kaze, overcome, could only whisper his name over and over again, in rhythm with their movement, their shallow breathing. Kumo, unable to speak, let his tiny cries peak and crest into their own soft and urgent song. The tears that came to his eyes fell openly--tears of pure joy.

He let his body rise as Kaze came down hard, letting his hips take the impact, seeking Kaze's lips and letting his hands find a grip on his love's shoulders. All his life, he'd waited for this. All his life... and now was his time. The sheer happiness, the love in Kaze's eyes, their mingled sweat and the soaring heat of their bodies... never had he felt this needed or this needful. Never had he felt love like this.

_Thank you, Kiri. Thank you for giving me the chance to feel this... for both of us._

---

Kiri smiled hollowly as he felt his brother's ecstasy wash over him.

"So this is what it feels like... to be loved..."

He watched in his mind with a smile and gentle sorrow as his little brother Kumo flew away from him to a place where he had never been and now could never go.

---

Their moment of climax came in one burst of straining, crying, clinging desperately, and kissing voraciously, then faded, and they parted.

Kaze fell exhausted at Kumo's side, shifting to his back and closing his eyes. That had taken more out of him than he cared to admit, but it had been worth every ounce of energy he'd given.

Kumo just lay still, waiting for his ragged panting to return to smooth breathing, letting his steaming body cool. Never before had he felt so alive. He turned to Kaze and smiled weakly, clasping the gunner's hand.

"Thank you."

Kaze smiled back and went to sleep.

The room was a complete wreck, of course. Their clothes were strewn all over the place, half the bedsheets had managed to come undone, and the window's surface was covered in thick white fog. Maybe if he was more awake, Kumo would've been embarrassed by that. But now... he was just waaay too tired to worry. He'd fix it some other time... like in the morning...

And in that instant, he was off and away, chasing after Kaze and his brother in their dreams.

(TBC)


	9. On the Way Down

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

_On the way down_

_I saw you and you saved me from myself_

_I won't forget the way you loved me_

_On the way down I almost fell right through_

_But I held on to you_

"On the Way Down"

Feeling the light beat against the lids of his eyes, Kumo let out a muted moan and opened them slightly, peering out from behind his long thick lashes. Realizing what the light meant, he slowly sat up and rubbed sleep out of his face. Looking around and wincing at the damage from the previous night, he reached over and shook Kaze's shoulder. "Wake up."

The sleepy gunner obliged, staring at his companion blearily through the thick brown curtain of his hair. "What time is it?"

Kumo shrugged, gesturing to the window. "Midmorning, maybe. We seem to have surfaced."

Kaze used his Magun to lever himself up, then peeked at the floor. "It looks like a tornado hit this place. Did we really do that?"

A touch of pink flew to Kumo's cheeks, but he nodded. Their clothes and the bedclothes were still strewn haphazardly across the room, covering the floor almost completely.

"Um... Kaze?" The gunner turned, realizing that the touch of pink had spread to a rosy flame across Kumo's whole face. "Thanks for not getting angry when I freaked out."

"I would have freaked out too, if I had your abuse record. I'm surprised you even let me keep going." Kaze sighed, shifted, and shook his head. "When they said that the first time hurts like hell, they weren't kidding. I couldn't believe how painful that was."

Kumo leaned back against Kaze's firm chest, closing his eyes. "Only in the beginning. And compared to what... what I've felt before, that didn't hurt much at all." He paused, then spoke again. "Kaze... that was your first time?"

The brunet averted his eyes, embarrassed. "Yeah. That's pretty pathetic for my age, but it's true."

"No, no, it's... it's kind of romantic." Kumo smiled wryly. "That's what I had planned to do... before, anyway. Save myself until just after the life-bonding was complete. It's alright with me. Besides... last night was my first _real _time."

"You acted like it." Kaze bent down and kissed the top of the green-eyed swordsman's head. "So afraid... my little virgin."

"Not anymore." There was a note of amusement in Kumo's voice. Pushing himself up, the young man stretched. "Uggh. I need a shower." As if sensing Kaze's reaction, he quickly added, "ALONE. I need to get clean... I'm still all sticky, and so are you."

"What if I want to come too?" Kaze teased.

Kumo laughed. "Then you'll have to either use your own showerhead or wait your turn."

"Or else what?"

The white-haired swordsman tapped the tip of Kaze's prominent Western nose and smiled impishly. "Or else I'll tickle you."

The corner of the gunner's mouth twitched. "Won't work. I'm not ticklish." His cerulean eyes sparkled wickedly. "But I think _you _are."

Before Kumo could react, Kaze shoulder-tackled him over and pinned him against the mattress, mercilessly brushing the fingers of his left hand across his little swordsman's flat belly. Kumo squealed, then tried to fidget away, caught in a helpless spasm of laughter. But no matter what he tried, Kaze had him trapped and wasn't letting go, something that suspiciously resembled a smile curving the left corner of his mouth. "Stop it!" he managed to choke out at last, tears on his cheeks. "Kaze, seriously, stop, I can't breathe!"

Reluctantly, Kaze removed the hand. Kumo lay flat on his back and waited for his fit of giggles to subside, gasping for breath. "Oh, God, I can't even _remember_ the last time I laughed that hard!"

Once his love was back under control, Kaze leaned down and gently kissed Kumo's lower belly. The swordsman's only reaction was a happy sigh, so the gunner decided he could be a little bolder. His soft kisses moved in a gentle line across Kumo's skin, crawling slowly up to his navel. As he licked its rim, Kumo whimpered; as he licked harder, mimicking a thrusting motion, Kumo arched his back and moaned. Like the rest of him, it tasted sky-sweet even under the thin film of last night's sweat. Kaze loved that taste.

Kumo poked Kaze in the hip with a toe, his words coming in another husky moan. "Don't."

Kaze froze. "Don't what?"

"Don't _stop." _Kaze smirked and continued his line of conquest, his kisses becoming increasingly rough and leaving faint marks on Kumo's light skin. When he pulled back to let out a slow breath against the swordsman's belly, he was pleased to note a hitch in Kumo's breathing as his abdomen prickled into gooseflesh. As he went back down, Kumo pulled him up, kissed him hard, and lay back against the bed. They loved each other, gasping and moaning, until the mattress rattled and shook.

After they climaxed, they chose not to part, but sat up, still tied together, Kumo in Kaze's lap with both legs wrapped tightly around the brunet's solid waist. Kaze held him there with his left arm tight around the thin shoulders. They rocked slightly, exchanging tender looks and gentle kisses.

"Kaze," Kumo whispered after about half a minute. "We don't have much chance of evading Chaos in the long run. I was prepared to face my fate before, but now... I can no longer accept my death. Not when I've just learned what it is to live." A single tear slipped down his face.

"Hush." Leaning forward, Kaze softly kissed his cheek. "Don't speak like that."

"I don't want to die," Kumo said in a quavering voice, eyes filled with further tears. "I want to live. With you."

Kaze held him tightly, kissed the nape of his neck, and released him, parting from him. "Go clean yourself up, love. Get dressed. Have a cry. I promise, I will never let anything like that happen to you."

---

Lisa could tell from the moment they walked into the mess hall together. It was written all over their faces, not to mention implied by the sexual undertones in their physical closeness. And the way they smiled at each other, and the kisses they exchanged--on the lips, when before they'd always aimed for each other's cheeks--and Kumo's hair, wet from the shower, and Kaze's face, which he'd washed in the bathrooms. At least they'd had the decency to clean up after themselves, but in a place like this... Lisa knew she'd have to avoid Kaze's room and the infirmary, for fear of catching the heavy scent of sex that would surely linger there. They'd finally made love.

"Excuse me," she said softly, standing up without even pushing back her tray, ignoring the strange looks and protests that Ai and Yu gave her. She walked quickly out of the room, sat down in the hall, buried her face in her arms, and sobbed.

"Lisa?" It was Kumo's voice. Lisa tried to quiet down, even to look up, but she couldn't. "Lisa, what's..." The voice trailed off. "Oh, God. I am such an idiot." The black-haired woman managed to peek up, realizing that Kumo had gone pale, his face stricken with grief. "You... you love him, too..." He leaned against the wall and covered his mouth with one hand. "I should never have... I should've realized..."

"Don't mind me," Lisa told him. "I'm just being selfish."

_"You're _being selfish," Kumo repeated, sighing.

"I am." She sniffed, feeling foolish, and wiped off her face, smiling ruefully. "You need him much more than I do."

"But you never even got the opportunity to say it," Kumo protested. "You deserved to have a chance just as much as I did."

"I did. I wasted it being a coward and not saying anything to him for fear of being rejected. Then you came along and now he's smitten with you. And after what you've been through... I couldn't horn in for the world."

"But still." Kumo shook his head, still looking sad. "You're miserable now because of my choice."

"It takes two to tango."

"What?"

Lisa sighed. "Evidently it was Kaze's choice too, unless _you _raped _him, _which I find extremely unlikely." Kumo blushed. "I think you're just looking for an excuse to feel guilty about it."

"No... I..."

"Besides, once I get over being a selfish bitch, I can still be his friend."

Kumo shut up and stared at the floor, suddenly seeming very interested in the wood paneling.

"And, you know, I am going to be happy for you even if it kills me."

"You don't have to..." Kumo began.

"But I want to," Lisa reasoned, sniffing and wiping her face again. "I don't want to be the bad guy here. And I don't want you to feel guilty or miserable or anything like that."

Kumo gave in, smiling wryly. "Well, there's always Knave."

Lisa shuddered, although she smiled back. "He's way too old for me."

"Cid," Kumo supplied.

Lisa shook her head ruefully. "Miles."

"Ummm... any of the other guys around here."

"No thanks. I think I'll wait for someone who's more my type." Both of them laughed. "Go on, get. You haven't eaten anything, and you're probably hungry." Kumo opened his mouth to protest that he wasn't, but his stomach did the talking for him, and he shut up, blushing again. "I'll be fine. Go." Obediently, Kumo went, giving her one last look over his shoulder.

"He's such a nice boy," Lisa commented once he was out of earshot. "Maybe... just maybe... things will work out better for Kaze that way."

---

The day passed slowly.

Cid kept the submarine at nearly surface level; high enough that the sunlight against the water's surface cast rippling patterns all over the ship and the rooms. Because the water they were passing through had a high concentration of Elenium, the chemical that allowed the ship to run, he was crawling along at a snail's pace and even considering breaking out the oars just in case.

Ai, Yu, and Lisa were hanging out in the main chamber, with Kaze sitting against the glass panel wall. Chobi was over by the radar controls, pestering Miles and Fungo. Knave was up at the cockpit, talking to Cid, and the troops ranged over the craft's interior restlessly.

Kumo had retreated into Kaze's room. He'd just finished moving his small collection of personal items from the infirmary; he'd paused when finished to stare out the window at the rippled patterns of light that played against the glass, and subsequently against his face.

For better or for worse, he'd gone too far to ever turn back now. He had almost recklessly entered a life-bond with Kaze, killed three people, thrown in his lot with the Comodeen, and was running for his life from the horrors of Chaos and his own past.

"Kukuriyu!"

Kumo flinched, then looked over his shoulder. Crux, who'd been wandering along the length of the submarine, had finally found him. She landed at his side, folded away her wings, and proceeded to scold him for "ditching" her.

"Sorry about that." He shook his head and picked her up. "You startled me. ...A lot has happened, and I was thinking. This is going to sound pretty stupid, but I forgot all about it."

"Kuu..."

"I know you think I'm hopeless. And, you know, up to a point, you're right."

She looked up at him with an unspoken question in her golden eyes.

Kumo sighed and shook his head, letting his soft hair spill across his forehead. "Hopeless. Without any hope... any hope at all." He flopped down against the freshly made bed, looking into her little face. "These poor people don't have any idea of what I've dragged them into just by joining them. I don't think Chaos and Oscha will stop at anything to get me back, and they want to kill Kaze... and probably you now, as well, seeing as you've betrayed them to stay with me. They've only seen shadows of the things that could be if they're caught between a rock and those two, and they still believe that they can get away. But I know. We'll spend the rest of our lives running. If we're caught, we'll be killed. It's not a question of 'if' we'll be caught, either... more like a question of 'when'." He sighed again. "I don't want to get these people into that kind of situation, but what can I do about it now...? And... there's a wild element involved, too." He paused, then smiled sadly. "I'm telling you this because I know you're one of the three closest friends I've had in all my life." She smiled back and continued to watch him, listening attentively. "I'm in love." Her eyes widened, then she looked down at her hands. "And... if not for this, I'd be the happiest person in the world. If we go down, my love will go down too, and I... I can't stand to let that happen to him. Yet..." He sighed, and in his eyes, she could see the look of a newly caged creature, or perhaps one that had finally grown unable to bear its cage any longer.

Kumo got up, letting her stay on the bed, and paced. "I'm trapped here, Crux. Trapped between something I want to avert, want to avert with all my soul, and the knowledge that I cannot avert it. No hope. There's been no hope for so long, the word sounds strange to me. The only thing I can imagine doing is... giving myself up. Violating my soulsworn bond. As ridiculous as it may be... to save my beloved."

"Kuuu," she protested, standing up and shaking her fists in front of her chest.

"I know," he said softly. "I'm afraid to do it, but... I can't let my friends die like this."

She threw her arms as far around him as she could, hugging him with all the strength in her body, and tried to keep her heart from breaking as his tears fell silently into her hair.

---

Aside from the shouting that originated in the galley, the submarine was quiet.

The concentration of Elenium had finally gotten so high that Cid was forced to shut off the submarine's engines, relying on the Comodeen crew to row the huge craft forward. While more practical and _definitely _safer, it was the slowest possible way to move forward.

Kaze was asleep against the glass wall, long legs stretched out before him. Kumo, also sleeping, leaned against his side, legs tucked politely beneath him, letting Crux sit in his lap. Lisa and the twins tried to wait patiently for the engines to start again, well aware that they weren't far from the final goal of Teros.

"Thank you all for waiting!" It was Cid's voice. "We're about to move into an area of the ocean with a lower concentration of Elenium. Once we have, we can get the engines running again!"

As soon as he'd finished speaking, a cry rose from the galley: "There's no more ocean left!"

And the submarine dropped onto solid ground with an ear-rending crash.

---

"My Jane...! Oh, man..." Cid, taking in the heavy damage to his beloved creation, head-slumped.

"No one expected the water to just end like that," Ai said, attempting to comfort him.

The submarine had dropped straight down after passing out of the ocean--a several-mile-high wall of water was just behind the party; they were now stranded in a forest environment.

"What's going on here? Do you know?" Lisa asked Kumo, who was standing and looking up at the ocean's abrupt end with an inscrutable expression.

"I have no idea," he said softly, shaking his head. "It isn't the doing of the Ocean Puzzle, but... I don't know how this could be. But then again... I haven't been in Wonderland for very long myself. Many things here defy expectations, and the laws of the original worlds... perhaps Teros is still close by."

A sudden shout drew everyone's attention to the sky. "Hey! Hey, you guys! Up here!"

The twins both let out happy yells as they saw the figure of a girl about their age floating above them, waving both arms above her head. "It's me--Lou Lupus!"

"You're flying," Yu said, pointing out the obvious.

"Are you sure it's not the legendary Ciel Lou or something?" Ai asked, giving her brother a smile and a sidelong look. Chobi, between them, let out a squawk of complaint; he was the heir of the Ciel powers that allowed the chosen chocobo of each generation to fly.

The girl named Lou touched down, ran over to the twins, and gave them both an enthusiastic hug. "Long time no see, you guys!"

She had short silver hair that stuck up in two earlike tufts and an open, pleasant face; her eyes were clear yellow, and strange marks like ovals with streaks running from their centers adorned both of her cheeks. She wore a simple green sleeveless dress that fell to her knees and pairs of brown, fuzzy arm- and leg-warmers, as well as a long red scarf and a cape of some translucent bluish material.

"Hey, you know what?" Lou said suddenly. "I haven't been able to find that guy Kaze-sama at all!"

"You mean Mister?" Ai jerked her thumb over her shoulder, pointing to where Kaze was sitting against the side of the submarine, having gone right back to sleep as soon as he'd disembarked. "He's right over there."

Immediately going pink in the face, Lou squealed and lunged. "Kaze-samaaaa!"

Ai, frowning, grabbed a fistful of blue cape, and Lou was stuck. "Let me go! Let me go!"

"This is Flying Water, isn't it?" the red-haired girl asked shrewdly as her brother, Lisa, Kumo, and the members of the Comodeen looked on. Crux, who had been next to Kaze, flitted over and perched on Kumo's shoulder. "Have you met Clear?"

Lou, ceasing in her efforts to get at Kaze, looked back at Ai, blank puzzlement on her face. "Huh? Who's that? Not me. I got this cape from my friend Mr. Bolbol!"

"Mr. Bolbol?"

"Yeah! He lives in a cabin not far from here. I'll take you to him right now!"

---

While Lisa, the twins, their friend, and the leaders of the Comodeen headed off to Bolbol's cabin to ask about the Flying Water, Kaze and Kumo parked themselves at the base of a tree outside. Crux, who'd been following Kumo around ever since he'd confessed the truth to her, took up a perch by his side.

The white-haired swordsman sighed and snuggled into Kaze's warm solidity, closing his eyes. He smiled briefly as he felt Kaze's lips brush against the top of his head, then shifted, sighed again, and drifted off. Since he'd slept almost all day while at Gaudium, he was used to dropping off just about anywhere, and within moments, he was safe in the arms of dreamless sleep, his friends on either side...

...until rough, angry hands pried him away from Kaze and shoved him into a sprawl on the ground. Looking up and trying to stifle a yelp of surprise and pain, Kumo realized that the one who'd removed him was a very pouty-faced Lou.

"Why are you hanging all over Kaze-sama like that!" she demanded. "I had it bad enough with Lisa when she liked him--what do you think you're doing, huh! Kaze-sama is all mine!"

All Kumo could do was blink, confused. "C...come again...?"

Lou seemed ready to burst out in another storm of angry accusations, but just as she opened her mouth, an equally furious Crux was in her face. "Kukuriyu!"

"What are you getting all loudmouthed about?" the little girl asked, giving the fairy doll a sidelong look. "It's _true, _so there."

"Kuuu...!"

"Yeah, well... huh?" Kaze had stood during the commotion and laid a hand on Lou's head, giving her a patient look before heading over to Kumo and helping him get up.

The swordsman smiled sadly at the two girls. "Settle down, you two." As Lou opened her mouth to protest, he continued. "Kaze is... an old friend of mine. We fought against Chaos together once." The little girl blinked and went "oh" as Kumo went on. "I didn't know that you were also a friend of his. I didn't leave you any room to sit down... next time, I'll give you space."

Blinking up at the swordsman and gunner, Lou smiled shyly and nodded.

---

"Kaze-sama and the others are the only people I've met in Wonderland who don't care that I'm a werewolf," Lou confided after she and the others had resituated themselves against the tree. "Everyone else just seemed so scared as soon as they found out... they always acted like I was going to hurt them. But Kaze-sama is different. He, Lisa, Ai and Yu... none of them treat me any differently."

"Werewolf...?" Kumo blinked down at her. "On my world... there were legends that told of an ancient people who could change themselves into beasts at will. You... have that ability?"

Lou smiled. "Yup! ...Although, it's not always as easy as you make it sound. For my people... staring into someone's eyes is a sign of trust. If you have faith in each other, then energy is formed, and you can transform into your other shape! But, since... I'm by myself now... I have to use into a mirror and stare into my own eyes, and believe that I can do anything." She dug in one of the yellow pockets of her dress and pulled out a little makeup compact. Although the box was empty, the inside of the lid had a brilliant mirror on it, which the girl displayed proudly. "My friend Mr. Bolbol gave me this, too, along with the cape."

"It must be a useful strength," Kumo said appreciatively. He paused, then spoke again. "Lou-chan... your home world has also been destroyed, hasn't it...?"

The girl nodded. "By Omega... I've been on my own ever since."

"Kaze and I... have suffered the same fate, although it was Chaos who murdered our people. Someday... if we are still together... we will tell you what happened." He closed his eyes and shook his head. "Even though it was so long ago... it still hurts to think about it."

"I understand." Lou looked like she did.

The cabin door opened with a squeak, interrupting their conversation. It was Ai. "Hey, you guys! We're going to head on to Teros--it isn't far from here at all. Are you coming with us, or what?"

"We are," Lou yelled back. "You think I'm letting any of you out of my sight now?"

She stood up and headed over to her friend. Kaze and Kumo exchanged glances of amusement and regret, and began to follow her.

"She's a lot like Aura, isn't she?" Kumo said quietly.

Kaze was silent, feeling the ache of the old wound once more. "...Yes."

"Let's go." But as they followed the children and the Comodeen, Kumo slipped his hand into Kaze's and squeezed it tightly.

---

They hadn't known what to expect, but this wasn't exactly it.

Teros was simply a huge field of solid blue ice. Nothing more, nothing less.

Ai walked up to the ice and kicked it suspiciously, then hopped back as a tiny bubble of ice crystal rose out of the sheet and floated in the air.

"This is it," Cid crowed. "This is Flying Water!"

Ai tentatively headed back onto the ice, then yelped in surprise as more bubbles of the substance rose around her. Her brother followed her, then Lou and Chobi, as the sea of ice rose into a series of shining glasslike orbs.

Kaze watched the children with a slight smile on his usually expressionless face. "The king asked for a lock to be built to guard the most precious treasure of the world. The finest locksmiths of the land produced three such locks--made of friendship, love, and wonder. The locks of friendship and love quickly crumbled, but the lock forged from a note of pure wonder held fast. The king was so pleased that he immediately set the lock and hid the key where no one would think to find it, where it lies to this day." Realizing that Lisa was staring, he shifted awkwardly. "...A legend... of my people."

"Your memory has been returning," Lisa stated simply, smiling. Kaze looked away, embarrassed.

"Allow me to introduce L'Amant cars 1 through 10," Cid cried, flinging out an arm to indicate the ten yellow supply cars he'd brought along. "This is their big debut!"

While he babbled on and on about the advantages of the L'Amant cars over other supply vehicles, ten members of the Comodeen headed out on them to begin collecting chunks of Flying Water, with Miles and Knave to direct their movement.

Ai sat down on an upraised portion of Flying Water and stared off into the distance. "Clear came here in order to hold in his Omega powers. As long as he was here, he couldn't destroy anything... where are you now, Clear?"

"Omega...?" Lou turned and stared at Ai, who was now completely spaced out.

Yu stared at the ground, a shadow of despair slowly creeping over his face.

"What's wrong?" Lisa asked, coming up to him.

The young boy snapped back into reality. "Oh, it's... it's nothing. I was just thinking that it's been a long journey to get to Teros... that's all."

Lisa nodded, but secretly she knew that Yu was lying. The combination of depression and fear on his face... it couldn't have been something so simple.

A sudden explosion drew the attention of the Comodeen and their allies--one of Cid's new vehicles had just blown up, apparently for no reason at all.

"My L'Amant car number seven!" Cid wailed.

Miles dashed over to the driver, who lay sprawled on the ground. "Are you alright! What happened here... what's going on!"

"All L'Amant cars pull back," Cid yelled. "Something's here!"

Kumo was staring past the destruction, his jadeine eyes wide with horror. "It's too late," he murmured breathlessly. "They're here..."

"Hello there," a familiar voice chortled with unholy glee.

Ai pointed, yelping. "It's that weird upside-down creep!"

Oscha had appeared, flanked by a huge mechanoid creation that seemed to have been behind the attack on the supply car.

"Return Makenshi-dono to us, or you will suffer the consequences," the sole Deathlord of Gaudium said in simpering tones, his boneless body wriggling in delight.

Lisa gasped in horror, staring at Oscha's robot. "That's... you attacked us with one of those before...!"

"We beat it once and we'll beat it again," Lou yelled.

Wordlessly, Kaze brought the Magun from beneath his cloak.

_"No!" _Kumo cried, his voice a desperate wail.

Everyone stared at him, shocked.

"If you shoot, you... you'll hit...!"

Lisa looked back at the giant creation, then cried out. "It can't be...!"

Within a glass chamber at the robot's center, the figure of a man with a tortured expression hung suspended in some strange liquid, gripped by the forearms and ankles by twisted cords and wires. Angry bruises showed starkly along his body; all that remained of his clothing was a strip of fabric slung low across his hips, granting him a bare shred of decency. His long crimson hair floated about his form as he was held there, unconscious, one of the heavy dark gray spikes on his forehead broken.

"If you shoot, you'll hit my brother," Kumo sobbed, trembling violently.

"Isn't it a dilemma," Oscha mocked. "You _do _know that he went through this to save _you, _after all... he was _pathetically _easy to capture, although he certainly served his purpose... he _barely _bought you enough time to save yourself, you know... he was nowhere _near _powerful enough to stand against meeee..."

"Let him _go," _Kumo demanded, his voice breaking into a wail. "Let him go!"

"I don't think I shall," Oscha trilled, laughing wickedly. "As long as the madoushi is in my possession, you can't attack... and you know the only terms I will offer for his freedom..."

Kumo shook his head, then stared at the ice, torn. _I knew it. I knew it would happen like this... oh, why didn't I stop it all when I had the chance...!_

Finally, he sighed and stepped forward. "Release him," he said tiredly, quietly, tears still twisting his voice. "Do so, and I will go with you."

"I have your word?" Oscha asked him, in devilish good humor.

Kumo nodded, his expression bleak from the gravity of his choice.

"No," Kaze whispered fiercely, catching hold of the makenshi's wrist.

Kumo turned to him with a wavering smile, tears starting to spill freely down his cheeks. "I'm sorry," he said in a sad little voice. "I guess I really can't keep the pacts that I make... but thank you for showing me what it is to be loved..." He leaned forward and kissed Kaze long and full on the lips, then gently pulled out of his grip. "I won't ask for your forgiveness this time... I know that what I'm about to do is completely unforgivable." With that, he turned and walked away, heading straight for the machine and leaving Kaze, Lisa, the kids, and the Comodeen in stunned silence.

As soon as he came to a stop before the glass panel, it retracted, letting the liquid inside the chamber spill out. The cords that had encircled Kiri's wrists and ankles withdrew, and no longer bound, he fell forward into his brother's waiting arms.

Kumo gently lowered Kiri's battered body to the ground, lovingly stroking the wet hair and bruised side. "Lisa," he called softly. "Take him for me."

The young woman ran forward to kneel at Kiri's side, looking from him to Kumo and back again. "My God... these injuries... they've...!"

"I know," Kumo said softly, voice choked by the knot of tears that was quickly crystallizing into his throat. "He saved my life when I needed to get away from Gaudium, and now he's paying the price. He's just a soul... if he's hurt too badly now, his spirit will simply cease to exist. Please take care of him... let him pass to the other side..." He leaned down and gently kissed his brother's cheek, then stood and began to walk towards Oscha.

"But they'll--!" Lisa began, her voice raised in a cry of protest.

Kumo turned and looked over his shoulder at her. "I know," he replied, his voice a husky whisper. "But I can't let this go on any longer. Run away. Don't come after me. When I... when it's over... I'll know that you're all safe. Please, just go." He continued on until he had reached Oscha's side; the Deathlord gestured in the air and the two of them vanished into smoke and mist.

Kiri moaned in agony, opening his crimson eyes to stare desolately at the spot where his brother had been standing. "Kumo... you can't...!"

But he was already gone.

(TBC)


	10. Haunted

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

_Watching me, wanting me_

_I can feel you pull me down_

_Fearing you, loving you_

_I won't let you pull me down..._

Evanescence, "Haunted"

"DAMN IT!"

Kiri's ragged cry tore through the empty air, twisting and reverbating through the chill left in the wake of Oscha's disappearance.

"Damn it... damn it... damn it...!"

Lisa knelt tentatively beside him and hesitantly put her hand on his back as his angry shouts dissolved into desolate sobs.

"Damn it... I could do nothing, _again... _Kumo... why...!"

"There's no trace of either of them," Cid reported. "They just... they disappeared into thin air... I suppose they have some way of warping through Wonderland's network of worlds. They've probably returned to Gaudium..."

Gritting his teeth, Kiri grabbed Lisa's upper arms and stared into her eyes. The black-haired woman almost flinched at the intensity of his crimson-eyed, tearful glare, but couldn't force herself to look away. "Listen to me... you have to help my brother...!"

"There's no way...," Lisa began uncertainly, but Kiri cut her off, glaring all the fiercer.

"Those _bastards... _you have no idea what they'll do to him...! Chaos will use him until there's nothing left of him... then kill him, horribly. I... I would do anything to stop it, but I... I can't help him... not in this state...! I can barely even hold a physical form... I have nowhere near the strength that would be needed to get him out of that place...! Please! You _have _to help Kumo...! Save him!"

"What's going on here?" Lisa whispered. "How did this happen to you?"

Kiri shook his head, his eyes darkening. "I was prepared to sacrifice myself to save my brother when he needed to escape from Gaudium before... but I didn't expect those bastards to capture me instead of destroying my soul. They tortured me and kept me to blackmail Kumo into going with them. And now... I won't let him die alone and afraid... I won't...!"

Kaze stalked over to the fallen swordsman and whipped the Magun from beneath his cloak. "He shall not meet such a fate. The sins of the past upon their backs... the chain binds them to my wrath. They will not escape our confrontation, nor the justice of the gods."

Kiri looked up into Kaze's angry blue eyes, pain on his face. "Promise me," he whispered.

"I swear it on my love for him," Kaze said softly, the edge in his voice easing.

"I can't hold this shape much longer," Kiri said softly, and Lisa realized that his form was beginning to flicker, becoming transparent. "But I will follow you, and hold you to your word. I will not let you abandon the only one I ever loved to a barren future of torture, rape, and death as long as you have the power to help him and I do not." And his astral projection vanished into mist.

---

Kumo looked up defeatedly as the door to the antechamber creaked open. Even before he saw, he knew who was coming.

Devoid of his heavy iron armor--devoid of all clothing--the man before him, with cold blue eyes, short and thick orchid-colored hair cropped an inch above earlobe-length, golden studs in both ears, unnaturally pale skin, and a sardonic smile, seemed to have walked straight out of one of Kumo's worst nightmares.

"Hello, my foolish little Makenshi."

Chaos.

Kumo was bound by Chaos-thread that covered his forearms at the center of the room, placed so that he could stand on tiptoe if he had to but couldn't gain full purchase against the floor, held in open space so that even in exhaustion, he couldn't destroy any internal organs with the weight of his ribcage as he would if tied against a wall. There were other reasons too, of course, but those didn't bear thinking about. He'd been stripped almost completely before being tied; the only thing he still wore was his choker of ribbon. Naked and vulnerable, he knew that the half-week-old scars on his chest and inner arms were still raw and angry and all too visible.

"Stay away from me," Kumo said tiredly, a note of wariness creeping into his voice. "I don't belong to you anymore."

"Don't you?" Chaos asked drily, walking brazenly up to him and kissing him harshly, forcing his lips apart and advancing greedily as Kumo tried to edge away within his binding. Pulling back, he stared at his captive, nose-to-nose with him. "You're a slut. A whore. A prostitute. As long as there's a man between your legs, you're happy, no matter who it might be--me, my servant, the Black Wind, or your own brother."

"Happy?" Kumo whispered, shaking his head slowly. "All you ever did was hurt me."

"But it doesn't _have _to be that way, does it?" Chaos said mildly. "Let me show you."

He hadn't been expecting the touch, or the teasing stroke that went with it. Kumo gasped, reeled, and nearly passed out from shock.

"If I remember correctly," Chaos commented, "you liked it when your brother played with you."

The unnervingly gentle teasing continued as Kumo struggled to back away, out of the monster's grip. This was wrong, so unbearably wrong. As his body responded helplessly to the erotic stimuli, his mind screamed at him in warning. Even the suggestion of Chaos' touch made him sick... and why... _why _wasn't he acting like he usually did...?

"Stop," he moaned, feeling tears prickle at his eyes. "Stop..."

As if in answer, Chaos' hand reached to brush against, then firmly stroke the soft skin of Kumo's apprehension-taut belly. The swordsman whimpered as his abdominal muscles twitched reflexively, still desperately trying to back out of Chaos' strange hold on him.

"Don't... please, don't... stop... stop..."

"Shh," Chaos murmured, leaning down. Kumo shrank away, closing his eyes and turning his head.

The warmth, then the suckling sensation, made the swordsman go rigid, shuddering in twinned nausea and traitorious pleasure, fighting to keep still.

"Stop," he cried, feeling his face flame. "Stop...!"

But of course, Chaos didn't stop. Kumo hung helpless, still struggling weakly, fighting Chaos and the natural reactions of his own body and his terror, his breathing ragged and uneven, sweat starting to bead on his skin. If only. If only he could make himself believe that it was Kaze or Kiri kneeling before him... if only he could resist the compulsion to slide further down the greedy, desirous throat... if only.

Finally, Chaos released him, and the taut strands of mottled reddish wickedness loosened, letting Kumo sink to the ground. Chaos stared down at him, showing no emotion other than vague satisfaction, wiping his face with the back of his hand.

He pushed Kumo onto his back, crouching over him. "Now it's time to return the favor," he said with a smirk, looking decidedly evil.

---

"But we should at least consider it," Lisa protested, shaking her head desperately.

"Absolutely not," Knave replied. "Without Kumo's power, we won't have a chance of storming Gaudium and making it out alive."

They, Kaze, Lou, the twins, and the rest of the Comodeen had retreated to the ship with the Flying Water they had recovered, managing to push the sub back into the water and take off.

"If we had Silvia, my flying machine, we might be able to launch a guerilla attack to rescue him," Cid put in, staring at Knave with obvious disapproval. "And with my new installations to Jane's hardware while we've been traveling, we could get back to the base in time! Why won't you consider it?"

"I will not allow Kumo to die like that," Kaze said softly but angrily. "I will not allow it."

"If we go there, we will die--that's exactly what he was trying to prevent by sacrificing himself," Knave pointed out, tracing his thick eyebrow irritatedly. "If we try to rescue him... mind you, it may already be too late to do so... what he's done will be meaningless."

"But we can't just leave him there," Miles shouted, standing up angrily. "He's our ally... and more than that, our _friend! _Can we really leave him to the same kind of suffering that brought him to us?"

There was a tense silence.

"We have to go," Ai said suddenly. Everyone turned to stare at her, but she didn't falter. "Kumo is a good person... he always did his best to help us, no matter what it meant for him. And... he's just going to get abused again if he's left at Gaudium." When the stares became incredulous, the twelve-year-old crossed her arms. "I know that Yu and me aren't supposed to know what happened to him, but come on! It was obvious enough. We _do _have sex ed in school, you know."

"Sis is right," Yu seconded, although the shadowed look of fear was slowly creeping over his face again. "We can't knowingly leave Kumo to something like that..."

"I haven't known him for long, but..." Lou began. She looked down at Crux, who was asleep in her arms, tears of despair and wild grief on her small face. "He was nice to me, like all of you are. I think we should help him."

"We must," Kaze said again, a growl rumbling through his words.

Knave sighed and shook his head. "I still don't think it's a good idea, but... it looks like I'm outvoted. Go on, Cid. Be the hero. Show us what it is you have in mind."

"Thank you!" The blonde inventor ran over to Kaze's side. "It's time to unveil the Elenium Cannon!"

---

As soon as Chaos withdrew, Kumo reeled helplessly to the side, choked out a cry of despair, and threw up, letting a stain of blood and the remnants of his last meal with the Comodeen and something that looked almost, but not quite, like mucus spread over the cold steel floor. His thin frame heaved, and he bent again, disgorging more blood and more of that mucus-like substance. Chaos, standing a few feet away from him, walked off, leaving him broken and sobbing next to the mess.

Kumo was red-faced, trembling, sweating, and crying, his throat raw--and not only from the suppressed screaming and traces of digestive acids. He still felt sick and achy and nauseated, but he had nothing left to throw up. The entire contents of his digestive system, along with what felt like half the blood in his body, were spilled in an uneven spatch beside him, choking him with the combined scent of pain and vomit and orgasmic release. He wanted to die. He just wanted to die so that it could be over...

Hearing padding footsteps, he looked up. Chaos was back, with a wet cloth in one hand and a flask of some clear liquid in the other. An oddly patient look on his face, he knelt on Kumo's open side and used the cloth to gently wipe the traces of blood, vomit, and semen from the swordsman's face. After he was done, he tossed the cloth away and held up the flask. "Rinse out your mouth first, then drink."

Kumo found the liquid to be water, cold and clear, as Chaos set the flask to his lips. Obediently, he used the first mouthful to get the taste of vomit--and, of course, what had sparked it--out of his mouth and throat, spitting it to the side, then emptied the flask, feeling tired.

Chaos hauled him up and started to pull him over to the far corner of the room, away from the bloody, nightmarish mess. Kumo was so out of it that he didn't notice for a few minutes that the threads that bound him were tracing across the ceiling at Chaos' command.

Deposited in the corner, he looked up at the man who had done this to him, tears beginning to form in his eyes once again. "Why...?" he asked brokenly. It was all he could bring himself to say.

Chaos set a finger to his lips, the cold expression still not changing. "Hush. It will all be over soon."

Within moments, the antechamber rang with the echoes of hoarse, broken screaming.

---

Cid pulled open a panel at the center of the main chamber and hit a switch on some control device, letting some kind of mechanical creation rise from the belly of the submarine. It was a little higher than Kaze's waist, just about tall enough for him or one of the taller Comodeen members to rest their hands on while standing. It seemed to be some kind of control panel, and at its center was a clear cyndrilical socket for something to be placed.

"It's up to you now," the inventor told Kaze, who nodded.

The gunner held out his right arm and gave the Magun a desperate look. _Now is **not** the time to disobey... hear my summons and **answer **me...!_

The crew and passengers stared as Kaze tensed his entire body, beginning to shake, forcing the green stone set in the golden cylinder to glow by sheer will. Slowly, almost hesitantly, the drill and black blades formed as the screws set into the sides of the heavy metal retracted, letting exhaust shoot out. The glow of the cylinder itself flickered as sweat began to stand out on Kaze's face and arm, plainly resisting the gunner's demand for his broken Magun to take shape.

But the demand wasn't a request. It was an _order. _And so the gun began to form, twisting around Kaze's wrist as a tourniquet and shaping the spherical chamber that held his black-veined heart, which was plainly racing at almost double its normal rate. The triple barrels solidified, and the Magun was complete.

Kaze closed his eyes, clearly exhausted, sweat dripping from his bare skin. The effort that summoning the gun had cost him was almost frightening, compared to the ease he had in calling it during dire battles. Lisa shook her head inwardly. There had to be some condition that wasn't fulfilled in this situation... something that would have to make Kaze strain so hard just to bring his birthright into existence.

The gunner extended his left hand, and Cid placed in it three bullets, each with liquid inside. "After studying your Magun, I've reached the conclusion that these should work well," he said, scratching his head. "These contain purified Elenium... as you know, firing it into this device will give Jane the power to move at a speed exponentially greater than usual. It's the only way we might make it in time, if what Kiri said was true."

Wordlessly, Kaze slipped each bullet into the gun, then locked it into Cid's power device. The inventor ran up to the cockpit and waved a hand; Kaze tightened his finger on the trigger and the Magun went off.

In an explosion of light and energy, the submarine leapt forward, and almost everyone fell over. The Magun disengaged from the machine, converting back to cylinder form. Lisa was on her feet again in time to see that Kaze was swaying just slightly where he stood--in time to catch him as he collapsed from exhaustion.

"Kaze...! Are you...?" He was still breathing, but his skin was a sickly shade of gray, covered in sweat. Touching the side of the Magun hesitantly, Lisa realized that his heart was still racing. If Kaze had stayed up any longer... it probably would have burst. Sighing in relief, she gently removed his shades and loosened the clasp of his cloak, letting him lean on her, lost to dreams. "He's only asleep," she murmured as Lou dashed to their side.

"We should be back at the base after about three hours," Cid called. "After that, though, Jane's gonna be useless until she gets repairs. We'll have to load Silvia's fuel and run if we want to rescue Kumo... it'll be about another hour from the base to Gaudium, which is around the halfway mark between Teros and our northern factory... just be ready."

"I just hope we make it in time," Lisa whispered, looking down at Kaze's sleeping form.

---

"No... NO!"

Kumo pressed his back to the wall, standing with his thighs clamped together. "No! Stay away!"

Bruises were starting all along his hips, shoulders, upper arms, and throat; blood was already tracing down his legs, gathering in a sanguine pool beneath his feet. After he had struggled to keep Chaos away before, the cold-eyed man had beat him, and the marks were starting to appear barely a minute later.

"You're growing tiresome," Chaos hissed, pinning Kumo to the wall with one hand and trying to pry his legs apart with the other. "Just give up already!"

"No!" Kumo stood firm. "Don't touch me!"

"Shut up." Chaos slammed him against the cold steel; Kumo's taut stance went slack for a bare moment, which was all that was needed. The cold-eyed destroyer shoved against him, penetrated him, and _slammed _their hips together with all the strength in his body.

Shrill cries tore from Kumo's throat without his having any knowledge of it. "KAZE! NIISAMA! KAZE! SOMEONE! PLEASE...! SOMEONE... SOMEONE...! NIISAMA! NIISAMAAA! KAZE! **KAZE! **Please... help me..."

But no one was there to help him. And the only reality...

The only reality was Chaos, filled with deadly anger and just-as-deadly lust.

The only reality was tight grip, twisting, grasping hands, the agony that vaguely suggested a cracked pelvis, harsh greedy kisses, the sickly mixture of sweat and blood, and the driving horror of pain.

Pain, where Kaze had shown him that one could be so gentle, so loving.

It was wrong... wrong.

Chaos stepped back, looking down at their bodies with an upraised eyebrow. "I'll be back once I've cleaned myself," he said pointedly. Both of them were streaked in blood from the waist down. And he walked away, leaving rust-colored prints on the ground.

Kumo sagged against the wall, bowed his head, and sobbed.

---

Feeling a twinge of sharp pain in his chest, Kaze shot an insistent glare at Cid. "Hurry."

"I'm flying this girl as fast as I can," the inventor replied distractedly, his eyes glued to the window before him. "We're almost there. Be patient."

"He doesn't have much longer," Kaze insisted. "Hurry."

Down in the galley, Miles and Knave were speaking to Lisa.

"Once we've docked, you, Kaze, and--against my better judgement--the children will infiltrate the structure, guided by Crux, who should be able to tell where Kumo is being held. _Ideally, _this is just a grab-the-hostage-and-run-like-hell operation, so we won't send any big force with you. We'll remain docked so that you can hurry back once you've got Kumo." Knave nodded. "That's the plan, at least."

"We'll be trying to get rid of those damn defense satellites while you're busy with the kid," Miles continued. "We're going to have to dodge their attacks to get in, because we won't have the time to destroy them if we want to get Kumo and get out. Got it?"

Lisa nodded. "Yes. Will you be alright with everything?"

"Don't worry," Miles told her, waving a hand. "Cid can take care of any machinery, no matter how advanced. Those defense satellites had better start praying, if they can."

Lisa smiled worriedly; she was about to speak again, but Cid's shout of "Hold on!" interrupted her.

The Comodeen braced themselves.

"This is it," Miles yelled. "You'd better get ready, Lisa! You and the others will have to get off the instant we stop!"

---

It was an odd group that ran through Gaudium's halls, one unlike any that the castle had seen before. A man and woman, along with three young children, followed Oscha's creation Crux as she led them quickly and efficiently through the labyrinth of passages that formed the castle interior.

"Kukuriyu..." Crux paused at the entrance to a long hall, pointing down to the door at the end.

"There?" Lisa asked, but Kaze was already tearing down along the thick red carpet that had been laid down the center of the room. She, Crux, and the children followed him.

Ai stopped short at the doorway, making a face. "What _is _that?" she asked incredulously, shaking her head. "It smells like somebody threw up in here...!"

Yu pointed to a dark spot at the room's center. "Someone did," he murmured.

"Come on," Lou whispered angrily, pulling both of them inside.

Kumo was hanging in the far corner of the room, standing on tiptoe in a deep pool of blood. Some dark substance was wrapped around his forearms, holding him in his position as he slumped forward in despair, letting his soft hair fall into his face. The insides of his thighs were coated in blood, which was also streaked across his abdomen and groin. Scratches and bruises once again covered his body, the worst of which was a dark angry bruise that stretched across Kumo's right hip.

Biting her lip, Lisa pulled a Swiss Army knife from her belt as Kaze ranged anxiously behind her, using it to cut the dark webby substance that held the swordsman from the ceiling. Once it fell away, she put away the knife while trying to support Kumo with her other arm, pulling him out of the pool of blood to sit down. As she took linen from her belt and wiped at the blood that covered his body, Kaze knelt on his other side and gently touched his shoulder. "Shiroi-chan. Wake up."

With a faint moan, Kumo opened his eyes, staring up into Kaze's cerulean ones in confusion and disbelief. "Ka..ze...?"

"I'm here," he whispered, stroking his love's hair.

"You... came for me...?" Weakly, he turned to see Lisa and the children. "All of you...?"

"Kuu," Crux said quietly from behind him.

"We're getting you out of here," Lisa said softly. "Don't worry about anything."

"We couldn't just leave you here," Ai added staunchly.

Kaze, meanwhile, had busied himself undoing the clasp of his cloak, and was now pulling it off. "Here," he said softly as Lisa pulled Kumo up. "You can't walk around this place with nothing on."

Lisa nodded and helped tug the black cloak around Kumo's unresisting form. As she tightened the clasp, she grimaced. "It's too big, but it's better than nothing." The cloak's tall collar fell from Kumo's throat to his shoulder, exposing a few of the bruises he still suffered from. "Come on, now."

And they fled.

But as they returned to the place where Cid's airship had been docked...

"What!" Lou stared. "Where are they!"

Ai stabbed a finger towards the horizon. "It looks like they're fighting something," she pointed out, straining to see. "What do they think they're doing? We've gotta get out of here!"

"An astute observation," a voice behind the seven of them simpered. They whirled, Kumo clinging desperately to Kaze's side and beginning to tremble in fear.

Oscha.

(TBC)


	11. Romancing Train

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

_Soshite kimi to futari kiri_

_Samayou monogatari_

_Kono tabiji shuten ni_

_Matte'ru mono ima wasuretai_

_Yume wo kanaeru michinori_

_Sono negai koso ga tsuyoi kagayaki_

_Saa namida mo tsurete'kou romancing train_

move, "Romancing Train" (Final Fantasy: Unlimited ending theme)

The sole remaining Deathlord of Gaudium laughed at the plight of the small group before him. "Quite the dilemma, isn't it?"

Ai and Yu drew a little closer to Lisa, who had instantly tensed into a martial-arts position; Lou's right hand twitched towards the pocket with the mirror inside almost subconsciously as she glared at Oscha; Crux hid behind the summoners; and Kumo edged closer to Kaze, clinging to the gunman's arm.

"Your little _friends _won't last long," Oscha told them dismissively. "Their craft can't hope to evade the satellites forever..."

Ai and Yu whipped around to stare at Silvia's attempt to evade the three twisted creations' plasma beams. As the two of them helplessly looked on, one beam caught the airship's side, making smoke trail from the exposed machinery. Another clipped one of the many propellors that kept Cid's pride and joy aloft, and the airship plummeted, black clouds of smoke and sparks in its wake.

"No!" Ai cried, stricken. "Cid... Miles... Knave... Fungo... it can't be!"

"Everyone...!" Yu shook his head. "No..." He gasped, letting his hand fly to the feather in his hair. "Oh, my God... Chobi! CHOBI!"

"How can you do this!" Lisa demanded, her clenched fists trembling. "How can you take the life of another without even the slightest shred of remorse!"

"None of that matters now," Oscha said dismissively. "For your actions against His Excellency... you shall be tried. You are his now."

Plumes of the same material that had bound Kumo shot from all over the room, and everything went black as their consciousness faded.

---

Ai whimpered, struggling to open her eyes through the terrible pain that flooded her whole body.

Slowly, the surroundings cleared. She was looking at what seemed like some huge molecular model, connected to a series of control panels that rested on a thin walkway over a seemingly bottomless void. Two vague figures in white coats hovered at the far end of the heavy metallic creation; nearer to her were Oscha and a little boy who sat in a hoverchair, a distinct look of evil satisfaction on his face. The Earl... it had to be him. He gave her a really bad feeling...

Twisting, she realized that she was caught in a web of tangible hatred, the same sticky blackish red stuff that had held Kumo in that tiny little room before. She was upside down, but nothing seemed to have happened to her otherwise... the Earl and that stupid upside-down creep hadn't even thought to take away Poshepocket, the creature of wishes that a mysterious woman had given to her shortly after she had first come to Wonderland with Lisa and her brother.

Yu was also tied in the same web, although he was right-side-up. He, too, was awake; he was looking at the two people in white coats with a tearful expression. Lisa was between them, unconscious, the strands of darkness too tight across her thighs and breasts. Turning in the other direction, Ai realized that Lou was on her other side, pinned with her arms at her sides, blinking away the same despairing exhaustion that she had felt only minutes before. Kaze, looking strangely thin without his cloak, was below the two of them, his Magun tangled worse than he was in the painful strands. Far to Yu's left, Kumo was also tied with them, a clear look of suffering on his face though his eyes were still closed. The blood that streaked across his legs had dried and crusted while they'd been unconscious... how long had they hung here...?

Ai glared back at the Earl, who still sat with a complacent expression, discussing something with Oscha. "You stupid Earl! You'd better untie us right now!"

The boy looked up at her, seeming irritated. "I didn't have to spare your miserable lives back there. You're something else, anyone ever tell you that?"

Ai pouted, letting her cheek puff out as she bit back angry words, staring again at the others who were present. The shock of seeing them clearly made her forget all about the insult. It couldn't be... but how couldn't she believe it, when it was right in front of her face...?

"It's Mommy and Daddy...!" The two adults looked briefly up at her, then went back to their work. "What's _wrong _with them!"

"What! Your mom and dad!" Lou yelped. She sure was wide awake now.

"It's who...?" Lisa mumbled, starting to shake off her dead slumber.

"Well, this has been a strange day," Professor Hayakawa commented to his wife. "It's certainly interesting how we've suddenly acquired these two kids out of the blue."

"Yeah... it's been weird," she replied. Shrugging, they returned to their control panels.

"HEY!" Ai yelled. "Can't you hear me! It's ME! Your _daughter, _Ai!"

"Wait," Lisa called. "Something's wrong. It looks like they're being controlled through some kind of hypnotism!" She turned to the Earl and his servant. "What's going on! Why'd you bring us here!"

"You're going to be processed as ingredients to help accelerate the growth of Chaos," Oscha informed her in devilish good humor. He turned to Ai and Yu's parents, bowing. "Pattisiers... we're counting on youuu..."

The Hayakawas both bowed, then straightened up, both looking cheerful. "Yes, sir, right away!"

"We will immediately begin preparing the ingredients," Mary Hayakawa told him.

"You bet your hat we'll make the best tasting dessert ever," Joe Hayakawa added with a smile.

"How can you say something like that!" Lou shouted, her hands in fists at her sides. "These are your own children!"

"It has been a great deal of work raising Chaos thus far," Oscha said mildly. "But thanks to Makenshi-dono, the time is finally right."

Kumo let out a soft moan and shuddered, slowly opening his liquid jadeine eyes.

"Start the processor."

Joe Hayakawa walked up to the machine. "Main switch... on."

The orbs of the huge structure lit up, each glowing softly from within in different colors. Each sphere was empty... save the top one, which held a pale-skinned boy with soft aqua-blue hair and wide, worried eyes of the same color.

Ai gasped, her umber-brown eyes going huge. "It's Clear!"

The boy blinked, pressing his hands to the glass that enclosed him. "Ai...?"

"In case you haven't noticed, Clear is actually Omega's heart," the Earl commented with a callous smile, seeming amused at Ai's horror.

"Omega's heart!" Lisa repeated, staring in disbelief.

"That's right. But even the all-powerful Omega can't do anything when he's all closed in. It's because of the Flying Water," the Chaos-child continued.

"Omega and the Flying Water have functions that contradict each other," Mary Hayakawa explained mechanically. "When combined, these functions cancel each other out, rendering Omega powerless. This is firmly supported in the physics of Wonderland."

"Wonderland's physics are amazing, aren't they?" Joe said affectionately. He and his wife laughed; it had a hollow, empty sound.

"Once Omega's many pieces were reunited, we could control him and send him forth to once again plague the outside worlds with Chaos," Oscha told them. "At least... that's what we had planned. But now, only Clear is left."

"Wait... Makenshi." Kumo looked up at the Earl despairingly. "As long as we have this invention, I can merge with Clear myself."

The white swordsman's eyes went wide with horror, and he let out a short gasp. "No..."

"What do you mean, merge!" Ai demanded, half-sobbing. "What are you going to do to Clear!"

"Just watch," the Earl said contemptuously.

Watch was all that Ai and the others could do. At Oscha's command, the Hayakawa professors flipped a lever, and electricity began to crackle through the chambers of the huge machine. As it raged through Clear's body, he let out a heart-rending cry and buckled, tears forming at the corners of his eyes. "AI...!" With a soft gasp, he went limp, his body fading and melting into the form of a many-pointed crystal star, the form that Omega took when held in its sleep of death.

"CLEAR!" Ai screamed, straining against the bonds that held her.

Lou, who had gone white with shock at the mention of the creature that had destroyed her home, suddenly exploded with rage. "You people are **DESPICABLE!** Can't you feel any remorse for what you're doing! Do you even UNDERSTAND what you've done! I HATE you! How could you! How COULD you!"

As Kumo bowed his head in grief--another innocent lost--he felt a tug at his consciousness. Opening his eyes, he felt a flicker of hope flash through his heart. _Yes. _At the other end of the thin walkway over the empty space of Chaos below, his discarded Maken lay, unwatched. Unguarded.

Closing his eyes, he called for the blade in his heart; when he looked up again, he guided its flight with his desperate wish. The fine sword, which had risen into the air at his command, sailed straight for the orb that held Clear's crystal...

And just as he began to think that maybe, just maybe, there was some hope after all...

A tight lance of the same material that bound him wrapped around the blade, catching it a mere hair's breadth from its intended target.

A lance of material that grew straight out of Chaos' hoverchair.

_No._

"You still had the strength to try something like this?" Chaos asked mockingly, reeling in the sword and regarding it with one upraised eyebrow. A wicked smile crept across his face. "You leave me no choice."

And leveling the Maken, he threw it through the air like a javelin.

All Kumo could do was hang paralyzed, helpless, unable to believe.

The deadly blade hit him a little below the ribcage; force and momentum carried it through his body, stopping at the hilt. His cry of pain filled the room, echoing and reverbating throughout the huge chamber, drawn-out, agonized, despairing, a scream for the one last desperate chance that had just slipped away. A scream for death.

Shuddering, moaning, Kumo fell forward in his bonds, hanging helpless in midair, half-conscious, his blood tracing spattered patterns on the walkway below. Lisa and the children stared, horrified, numbed by what they had just seen.

Kaze, who had jolted awake at the wretched sound, twisted to see his love's transfixed body and shook his head, unwilling to believe. "Shiroi-chan..."

"Be quiet," the Earl said coldly, staring at the white swordsman with distaste.

"Mister!" Ai yelled. "DO something! Take them out with your Magun!"

Oscha turned to look over his shoulder. "Crux," he called. "I want you to feed Chaos now."

The little sprite reluctantly hovered forward, weighed down by the huge bag she carried. Stopping over the abyss, she turned to look at Kumo, tears forming in her golden eyes. His thin frail frame was bent with pain, his black-lashed eyes starting to flutter closed, his breath rasping, the borrowed cloak soaking with blood. Something twisted at her heart, and she hung her head, shaking.

"Do it," Oscha hissed, an unspoken threat in his words.

"Kukuriyu!" she cried suddenly, staring up at him with hatred in her eyes, melding with the grief for Kumo that hung over her small body like a veil. "Ku... kuiyuu!"

"Insolence," Oscha snapped, anger laced through his voice.

Struggling to stay conscious, Kumo painfully raised his head. "No... no! Leave her alone! Crux... just do as he says! Please! I..." But what he was trying to say was cut off by a sharp burst of coughing, and the blood that exploded from his chest as he tried his hardest to speak.

Another of the Chaos-threads snapped towards her, striking her with terrible force. She hit the far wall with a sickening crack, collapsing onto the thin catwalk that circled the vast room. The cloth she carried fell from her hands, and its contents--all the Soil bullets and Mist bottles that Kaze and Kumo had possessed--spilled into the void below.

"CRUX!"

Trembling, she raised her head, managing to make eye contact with Kumo and give him a tiny smile before collapsing, little sparks flying from her back.

"No... NO!"

"I thought I told you to be quiet," the Earl growled. The darkness binding Kumo tightened, drawing another strangled cry of pain from his blood-choked lungs, squeezing until he lapsed into unconsciousness, a look of utter despair on his fair face. "You can forget about calling any Summons."

"This... is bad..." Ai said softly.

"Why are you doing this!" Lou demanded, her anger flaring once again.

"What are you planning to do now?" Lisa asked defeatedly.

"With the combined power of Chaos and Omega, we will now be able to destroy and consume the new outside world," Oscha chortled.

"New world...?" Lisa repeated weakly.

"Well, you don't mean _our _world, do you?" Ai managed.

"You are _exactly _right."

Ai wailed out her rage. "Listen, Poshepocket! I don't care _what _it is, just give me _something _that can take care of these _monsters!"_

The little ball of cream-colored fluff at Ai's hip tried to wiggle out of the tape that held it in place, but couldn't in time to evade the strand of Chaos that expanded to cover and absorb it, plucking it from Ai's hold and letting the tight orb of bloat it produced dissipate into nothingness.

"No...!" Ai called, desolate. Her only way of helping her friends was gone.

"Stop it!" Yu shouted suddenly. "That's enough! Stop it...!"

The Earl stared at him, then smiled. "Now I see it all," he said softly, a wicked edge to his child's voice. "Oscha... you knew about this all along, didn't you?"

"Of course, Your Excellency," the necromancer replied, bowing low.

"What are you talking about!" Yu demanded.

"The two of us are going to merge together with your sister," the Earl told him lazily. "I think that's a great idea, don't you?"

"WHAT?"

"You two are the perfect ingredients to use in feeding Chaos," Oscha simpered. "Yes... good enough to force all of Wonderland to evolve, I'd say. We were just awaiting the time when you would be old enough... We lured you in with the phantom subway train, then controlled your journey through the use of different predicaments... tracking you all the while with the transmission device that was attached to the chocobo."

A flash of memory suddenly lit Lisa's mind. _"A man I'd never met before asked me to make it for him... but who added all this unnecessary junk? It's been heavily customized..." _Cid had said that after examining the watch that had always hung from the collar Chobi had worn when they'd found him. It couldn't be... Chobi? Yu's beloved pet had just been a plant, set by the enemy...?

"We watched over you carefully, like a farmer does to his cattle... raising you all this time to be the perfect ingredients."

Yu gritted his teeth. "But why'd you do that to us! I think you're lying!"

"Yu's right," Ai cried. "Look at us! We're just regular kids!"

"No you're not," Oscha corrected triumphantly.

"No, _don't!" _Lisa cried suddenly.

"You two were found in Wonderland," Oscha told them. "You are _entirely _different beings."

"What are you saying!" Yu said softly. "Do you mean that we're not even human...?"

"What about Mommy and Daddy? Does that mean that we're not their real kids either?" Ai asked, her voice quavering. "Is that why... they're...?"

"NO!" Lisa shouted. "You mustn't think that! Please--listen to me...!"

But the twins were already lost, trapped in their own world of misery.

---

"STOP! Please, you must stop this madness!"

Oscha and the Earl had just finished loading Ai and Yu into two of the chambers of the Omega device; the Earl was now in the central one.

"Begin the conversion process," Oscha ordered.

Lou glared down at the Deathlord, straining. Her right hand was almost inside her pocket after several minutes' worth of wiggling. Trying her hardest to reach, she felt her middle finger brush against the cold metal of the folded mirror and gritted her teeth. Almost there... just a little further... but would she reach her vessel of transformation in time...?

As the Hayakawas advanced towards the control panel, Lisa turned her attention towards them. "Professor Hayakawa! Try to think back! Don't you remember twelve years ago... when you lost your children...? Can't you hear me...?"

"Do it," Oscha ordered.

Joe pushed the lever forward, and the electricity began to flow.

Ai and Yu both screamed in pain as the crystal that had once been Clear vibrated. The Earl also let out a cry, but unlike the others, he didn't seem to feel the electric current. "It feels... so good... it feels great!"

"LISTEN TO ME!" Lisa shouted. "My name is Lisa Pacifist! I am an agent who was dispatched to search for _you! _That is why I have been traveling with Ai and Yu--your _children, _Ai and Yu, who have believed all this time that the two of you were performing research on the physics of Wonderland, but_... they've risked their little lives to search for you, and you're going to **kill **them!"_

Letting out a cry of anguish, Joe yanked the lever back as Mary hit the switch that would shut off the machine. Both of them slumped against the sides of the panel, trembling.

"What was I thinking?" Joe murmured to himself. "Ai and Yu are our own children!"

"They may not be our flesh and blood, but that doesn't matter," Mary whispered.

"Daddy," Ai said softly, struggling to raise her head.

"Mama..." Yu called.

Something small and green forced its way out of each professor's ear and dropped to the ground, wiggling until they burst.

"What is this!" Oscha cried. "Herba's manipulative seeds have failed!"

"That's what I call true love," Lou shouted, drawing everyone's eyes to her.

The little girl was gone. In her place, a gray, gold-eyed wolf was tied in the web of Chaos-thread that strained to hold her powerful form. With one silver howl, she caused the glass of the machine's orbs to shatter, resulting in an explosion that made the entire thing collapse.

When the dust cleared, Ai and Yu could be seen lying next to each other amidst the rubble. Slowly, carefully, they sat up, and seeing their parents standing nearby, they ran to embrace them.

"We're back now," Mary told her children.

"We're sorry," Joe said, ruffling Ai's hair. "We love you!"

Weak with relief, the twins looked at each other and started to laugh.

Meanwhile, Lou was busy cutting the others from Chaos' trap.

"Thank you so much," Lisa said softly as Lou helped her to the ground.

"You can always depend on me, Lisa-san," the wolf-girl replied, busy pulling Kaze from the vicious tangle. "...Kaze-sama, are you alright now?"

"I'm so glad you're still alive," Lisa cried, squeezing Kaze's shoulder.

The gunner, ignoring both of them, looked back up at the only one still tied in the web, his eyes darkening. "Shiroi-chan..."

Lou leapt back into the air, her glide sustained by her Flying Water cape, and carefully chewed and clawed apart the thread that still bound Kumo's broken body. Once he was free, she gently lowered him to the walkway, trying not to disturb his wounds or the Maken still thrust through his upper abdomen. "I think he's still breathing," she said softly as Kaze brushed past her.

The gunner knelt at Kumo's side, giving his hair a soft stroke and touching one finger to his pale cheek. He was silent, but all the grief in the world had centered in his cerulean eyes.

Beside the reunited Hayakawas, a red-black tentacle of Chaos-thread rose from the rubble, speeding furiously towards them. Ai and Yu noticed it just as it was about to whip into their faces, crying out as one--

But before it could reach them, a swell rose at its center, causing the ugly tentacle to burst. As the Hayakawas stared, not sure what to expect, a small ball of creamy fur fell to the ground before them.

"Poshepocket!" Ai cried, running to pick the little wish-granter up.

She didn't see the second Chaos-spear rise from the rubble as she bent down, but Lou did.

"Look out!" As Ai turned, shocked, she saw the flash of green cloth and gray fur as Lou leapt in front of her, then the splash of dark red as the deadly strike drove through the wolf's chest instead of hers.

Lou gasped weakly, melted back into human form, and collapsed into the wreckage as everyone ran to her side.

Carefully, Lisa pulled the mortally wounded girl into her arms, bending over her as she moaned softly, opening her blurring golden eyes.

Looking up at her friends, Lou smiled. "Hey, Ai... hey, Yu... I'm... so glad... you found them... your parents..." Her speech was soft and stilted, easily broken by the rasp of her breathing while a dark flower of blood spread over her chest.

"Lou..." Ai murmured, not even trying to hold back the tears that were starting to spill down her face. Both she and Yu were crying; Lisa seemed stricken, and the professors were respectfully silent.

"Kaze-sama..." Lisa spared a look over her shoulder; Kaze was standing behind them all, looking down at Lou with soft sadness in his eyes. "Kaze-sama, please... your eyes... am I... in... your eyes...? You'll always... be in mine... forever... and... e..ever..." Her voice trailed off, and her eyes fluttered shut as she slumped back in Lisa's loose embrace, a gentle expression on her face.

"Lou!" Yu reached forward, then checked himself, shaking his head. "You can't...!"

But there was no response. It was too late... she was already gone..

Though tears came to their eyes, fate would not allow them the time to grieve for their dear friend.

"You guys are really being _bad!"_

The voice belonged to the Earl, but there was no mistaking the creature that reared from the wreckage of the Omega device as human. It was immense, about the size of the dragons Kumo summoned with his Mist, with a vaguely pear-shaped body, a misshapen face, and twisted wings formed of many crisscrossed red-black threadlike tentacles. "It looks like I'm going to have to eat you myself!"

A black-violet swirl enveloped the immediate area, and Lisa instantly felt the void of Chaos' being beginning to drain at her life force. Her limbs felt like they'd become lead weights; it was a struggle just to keep her head up. Still, she remained in her kneeling position, clutching Lou's still-warm body to her chest. She could never give in... she was the kigen, the savior of souls...

Beside her, Ai and Yu had also gone to their knees, fighting with all their childish vigor against Chaos' draining force. Their parents clung to each other to stay upright, the effort showing on their faces. And Kaze... amazingly, he stood straight and tall, glaring up at the incarnation of evil with almost palpable hatred. Though sweat stood out on his arms and face, he adamantly refused to allow his soul to be consumed.

"Kaze..." Yu turned towards the gunner, desperate. "Kill him!"

"Do it for Lou," Ai cried, her voice rising in a shout.

And the Magun began to glow.

Lisa nodded to herself through the agony and despair. "That is Ai and Yu's power," she murmured to herself. "The Magun is _theirs _to control..."

Within mere moments, the summoning gun had formed, and Kaze leveled it at Chaos, his eyes narrowing with the force of his hate.

"Hah!" Chaos crowed, staring derisively down at the tiny group of resisters. "What do you think you're gonna do without bullets?"

Surprisingly, Kaze replied. "I didn't have any the first time, either. But... I reached Chaos nevertheless. And... then..."

---

"Kukuriyu..."

Kumo let out a soft moan, opening his eyes and trying to focus his vision. Crux was standing before him, sparks flying from her back, holding something out to him, something strange in her eyes.

"Ku..." She held it forward insistently, begging.

Kumo blinked. Crux was holding a Mist bottle in both hands, making an offering of it to him.

Weakly, he tried to push himself upright. "How did you...?" A spasm of pain tore his body, and he tried his hardest not to cry out.

"Kuu," she said softly, her golden eyes filling with concern.

"I don't matter now," Kumo replied, his voice quiet with the knowledge. "But you..." Gritting his teeth, he shoved himself into a sitting position, feeling the world tilt as he did.

"Kukuriyu..." She placed the bottle in his outstretched hand. He didn't need to ask to know that it was the last... their last chance against Chaos. Turning it over and over, he suddenly realized that the cap had been lost. That almost made him smile. Fate had saved him the trouble of taking one off anyway.

He would need an empty bottle for this.

"Ku... kuu..." Looking down, he realized that the flashes of sparks leaping from Crux's body had grown worse. The impact against the wall had apparently damaged the mechanism that kept her alive... she was breathing roughly, looking up at him and begging for... something.

Gently, he pulled off the helm that bound her light violet hair, letting it straggle into her face, bent down, and kissed her forehead. "Kansha suru." A single tear traced down his right cheek as she pressed her little face to his; she cried out once, then it was over.

Still crying silently, Kumo gently closed her eyes and laid her down, giving her one last loving look. "You were one of my very best friends," he whispered brokenly. "You, Kaze, and Niisama... what will become of us all...?"

He turned, gripped the hilt of his Maken, and gritted his teeth, squeezing his eyes shut. Fighting back the screams of pain that threatened to overwhelm him, he slowly and carefully pulled his sword from his body, slashing it to clean off his blood.

As soon as he was free of the Maken, he opened his eyes once again, breathing hard, letting sweat drip from his face. The sense of sweet release that sang through his blood, along with the dizziness and the almost silly vague stinging of the wound, made him smile bitterly.

Carefully, he stood, ignoring the rush of fresh blood the movement brought. Either way, he would soon die. It didn't matter what he did, so long as he didn't die right this minute. He closed his eyes, sought inside him for the thread of power that would prepare him, and felt the sweet rush through his shoulderblades. Looking over his shoulder, he smiled sadly at the violet-pink shine of the glowing, translucent wings that had appeared there. A shame that he could only reveal them at this moment... he would have loved to see Kaze's reaction to his innermost self while the two of them were alone together.

No matter now.

He walked a few paces, and leaped into the air one last time.

---

"Don't fail us," Lisa murmured, staring at Kaze as he faced down the behemoth that was Chaos.

"You're finished," the monster gloated, preparing to deal the blow that would kill them all...

"Black Wind... Kaze!"

Kaze whirled, his eyes going huge in disbelief. Lisa, the twins, the Hayakawas, and Chaos itself all followed his line of sight and echoed his stunned gasp.

Kumo hovered there in midair, glorious and beautiful and sad, his expression controlled and decided. Kaze's bloodied cloak floated about his thin form, along with the pale ribbon that was still attached to his choker collar, bleeding profusely, his sword in one hand and a Mist bottle in the other, a beautiful and strange pair of wings like violet-pink peacock feathers in a butterfly pattern newly formed at his back.

Grim purpose and love in his eyes, he held the empty bottle before him. His voice echoed in the dead silence, though he spoke not louder than a whisper. "This is the Mist of my very soul."

With a practiced flick of his wrist, he tossed the bottle into the air, transforming the Maken into broadsword shape by twisting it in the air. "I must play it!"

He rose to the arc of the bottle's path, his wings' glow brilliant and blinding, martyr's ecstasy on his face, his form suddenly hazing and slipping into Mist itself, gathering at the focal point of the glass as a starburst of sword slashes configured his final dance.

Though lost, his voice rang through the chamber: "Symphony of the White Cloud!"

The bottle of Mist erupted into blue-white soul flame that streaked straight for Chaos, striking its chest and sending a ripple of white fire through the corrupt form. "How stupid...!" the monster cried as its body began to jerk uncontrollably, twisting, seizing, _changing. _"To come just to be eaten...!"

With a roar that was half scream, Chaos shuddered into a red-and-black version of Kumo's dragon summon, traces of white still on its face.

"Shiroi-chan..." Kaze whispered, the horror of realization on his face.

"Kumo...?" Lisa stared up at the creature, desperately searching, trying to see what the makenshi had done to alter the state of things.

The Chaos-dragon was trembling uncontrollably. Unbelievably, Kumo's voice echoed from it as Chaos' should have. "Ka..ze...!" The gunner flinched, still standing with the Magun out, frozen where he stood.

"You... think you can defeat me...?" Chaos raged.

"Quickly... while I'm sealing Chaos...!"

"I'll kill you all!" the monster ranted.

"NOW!" Kumo nearly sobbed. For the briefest moment, a projection of his form flickered before the twisted creature that was equally him and Chaos.

Kaze stared up at him, a tormented expression on his face. How did Kumo expect him to...!

And then he remembered.

It was the only way... that _they _had been able to defeat Chaos, that dark night twelve years ago. Except that then, their roles had been reversed... Kaze the sacrifice, and Kumo the one with the terrible duty of ending his love's life to save everything.

_Kaze... _The soft voice spoke only in his mind, calling his attention back to the body of the girl in Lisa's arms. _Use me._

Another flicker of memory flashed unbidden through Kaze's mind, and he squeezed his eyes shut, unable to hold back tears. "Aura... my sister..."

In Lisa's arms, Lou began to glow.

While Lisa, the twins, and their parents stared in disbelief, her form faded, then flickered, becoming a rainbow helix of light and color. Kaze held out his left hand, and the helix spun into a glowing Soil bullet, the color of the crystallized life inside shifting to every hue of the spectrum.

"I don't care how much blood is shed... as long as it is used to destroy Chaos!"

His voice rising to a shout, he clenched his fist over Lou's willing sacrifice. "Now!

"The light that fills up your eyes--Tears of the Rainbow!"

He slid his sole Soil bullet into the first chamber of the summoning gun, sensing the second spirit rise before him, as he'd had a feeling it would.

Kiri stood before him in a flash of red, his crimson hair stirring about his form, the long flame-colored feathers streaming behind him, resolution in his eyes. "Because I love him," he whispered, and closed his eyes, his soul flaring out in one last burst of glory.

Kaze held the second bullet, this one blazing carmine, before him. "The cry of an ill-fated love--Heart's Blood!" Kiri's life joined Lou's in the barrel of the Magun.

"And finally..." But while he should have named the final Soil in the summon combination, Kaze instead pressed his hand to his own chest. "The Soil charge triad to use against you... has been decided!"

And a brilliant white glow traced a double spiral around his form.

"Soil charge...?" Ai whispered.

"Kaze..." Yu said softly, eyes huge in realization.

Kaze did not turn, but spoke softly. "Lisa."

Lisa gasped, letting the tears spill down her face. It was the very first time he'd called her by name.

"Do it... fire me."

And the light blazed, too brightly for them to stand. "The helix of my life... Endless White!"

Lisa pressed her hands to her chest, tapping the endless well of Kigen within her as she leapt to her feet automatically. _Transform my life into spiritual energy..._

Feeling the pressure at her wrist, she opened her eyes and whipped the Magun up before her, leveling the heavy gun at Chaos' twisted stolen body. "Onegai... **_don't destroy life!"_**

And in an explosion of brilliance, the Magun went off, wrapping Lisa, the twins, and the professors in the smoke of the gunshot.

The three Soil spiralled into the form of the white gun dragon, which stared down the corrupted sword dragon, growling out a challenge. Chaos' control over Kumo's body was now complete; it returned the growl with a snarl of hate, and the two dragons erupted through Gaudium's roof, twisting around each other into the sky, finally colliding in an explosion of energy that shattered the flying castle of evil memories into thousands of pieces.

And in the midst of it all, the two of them took form once again.

Through the overpowering need to let go and sleep forever, he offered a tiny smile, his hazing jadeine eyes staring up at his love. "Kuroki... Kaze..."

There were tears gathering in the cerulean eyes they met as their lips touched briefly, tears that threatened to fall as they pulled away. "Shiroi... Kumo..."

And they fell, and all was softness and sweetness and safety and their sad love for each other.

From the wreckage of the castle, a broken shriek heralded their descent:

"UNLIMITED...!"

(TBC)


	12. Epilogue: Give a Reason

Far Gone

See disclaimer in the Prologue

-----

_Memagurushii jikan no mure ga_

_Hashiri nukeru machi wa sabanna_

_Kawaru ga waru syu-ru na nyu-su_

_Asu ni nareba daremo wasurete'ru_

_Ikite-iru, ima ikite-iru_

_Sonna naka de nanika wo motome_

_Mogaku you ni nukedasu you ni_

_Kono chikara wo tameshite mitakute_

_Kitto dokoka ni "kotae" aru_

_Umarete-kita kotae ga_

_Hito wa minna, sore wo motome_

_Yarusenai nogasenai yume ni mukau no_

_Kizutsuku koto wa kowakunai_

_Dakedo kesshite tsuyokunai_

_Tada, nanimo shinai mama de_

_Kuyandari wa shitakunai_

_Here we go! go! hashiri-tsudzukeru_

_Dare ni mo tomerare wa shinai_

_Mirai no jibun e to_

_Give a reason for life todoketai_

_Hakari shirenai ooki na yami ga_

_Oto wo tatete mukatte kite mo_

_Asa ga kireba dareka ga ireba_

_Kokoro ni aru zetsubou wa keseru_

_Motto tsuyoku ime-ji shite_

_Hohoende'ru jibun wo_

_Shinjite'ru omoi, sore ga_

_Nani yori mo dare yori mo yume ni chikadzuku_

_Go-ru ni motaretari shinai_

_Tatoe, tadoritsuitatte_

_Atarashii yume ga kitto_

_Watashi no senaka osu kara_

_Here we go! go! hashiri-tsudzukeru_

_Dare ni mo tomerare wa shinai_

_Mirai no jibun e to_

_Give a reason for life todoketai_

_Kitto dokoka ni "kotae" aru_

_Umarete-kita kotae ga_

_Hito wa minna, sore wo motome_

_Yarusenai nogasenai yume ni mukau no_

_Kizutsuku koto wa kowakunai_

_Dakedo kesshite tsuyokunai_

_Tada, nanimo shinai mama de_

_Kuyandari wa shitakunai_

_Here we go! go! hashiri-tsudzukeru_

_Dare ni mo tomerare wa shinai_

_Mirai no jibun e to_

_Give a reason for life todoketai_

-"Give a Reason" (Slayers opening theme)

-----

A soft flash of green and white lit his vision, then faded.

Letting out a muted moan, he realized that he'd opened his eyes for a split second, and decided to try again. As he did, the pattern of white shapes on green bloomed before him; he was staring at pale flowers studded within long soft grass.

Smiling, he reached forward to touch one silky petal, then stopped as he saw his own hand before him. With a small frown, he turned his wrist, opening and closing his hand.

_I'm... alive...?_

Slowly, he sat up, his movements careful. He was sitting in a wide field, surrounded by a thick carpet of mingled grass and flowers, which were pressed flat where he'd been lying; there was another indentation not far off where, presumably, someone else lay.

With a sudden gasp, he remembered his injuries, and pressed a hand to his abdomen, his concern turning to wonder as he realized that he touched not blood or open, torn flesh, but a patch of rough, scarred skin about the size of his palm. _I've... healed? How can this be...?_

A gentle breeze stirred the grass, making him shiver; he had awakened almost completely naked--he only wore his choker collar. As the breeze strengthened, it ruffled his hair; a soft silver curtain blew around him, and his heart nearly stopped in shock.

Shaking his head, he reached out and gently caught a fistful of long white hair. _What the...? How long have I been here...? My hair can't possibly have just grown this long unless I've been here for years... I don't understand. _Looking back at the ground, he shook his head. That couldn't be. If he'd been lying there for much longer than a week, the grass below him would've died; he'd have awakened on bare earth. And yet, while his hair had been cropped short when he'd... died, gone comatose, whatever... now it was as long as Kiri's had been.

Straightening up, he caught a flash of brown in the hollow near him, and reached out to touch the broad shoulder. "H...hey... wake up."

The groan and shift confirmed his guess; it was Kaze there. Slowly, the gunner sat up, staring at him in first confusion, then disbelief.

Kumo, too, stared. Kaze's hair rippled down his back, unbound, in familiar red-brown mahogany waves, but on the right side of his head, one long tuft of hair was wolf-silver.

"Kaze, your hair..." he said softly, reaching out to touch the streak. "How did this happen?"

The gunner shook his head. "And what happened to your eye?"

Kumo blinked. "Wh-what do you mean? I can see alright..."

Kaze pointed, careful not to actually touch Kumo's face. "Your left eye... there's a red fault in it, near the pupil..." Realizing which hand he'd used to actually point, he stared. It was his right.

"Kaze..." Kumo gasped, his eyes huge. "The Magun... you're free!"

Slowly, Kaze pressed his hand to his own chest; warmth spread over his entire body as he felt the soft pulse of his heart there. "The Magun is... gone... I've been released by Fate..."

Kumo put his arms around the gunner, giving him a gentle hug. "I'm so happy for you... you've been waiting for this day all your life, haven't you?"

"For many lifetimes, it seems," Kaze murmured, kissing the side of Kumo's throat. "But how...? How did we survive...?"

Kumo shook his head. "I'm not sure... I can't remember it clearly... but we shouldn't have. I mean... it wasn't just the fact that I'd been hurt, or you gave yourself up to summon... there was extensive damage done to our souls... either we shouldn't exist now, or we should be recovering under the care of a guide..."

"My spirit... feels whole to me," Kaze said softly.

Kumo frowned as a brief flash of memory lit his mind. _Held in someone's arms... I was in so much pain... I tried to move and couldn't... tried to scream but couldn't... wanted to cry, but... they held me, spoke to me... what did they say...? Can't remember... just warmth and words of love and red..._

_Red...?_

A softly spoken phrase filtered through his mind and heart. _"I told you, ototo-chan... you have to live, for the both of our sakes..."_

His eyes went huge, and he pulled out of Kaze's arms, both his hands pressed to his mouth. "No... oh, God, God, Nallorn and Gaedrian, it _can't _be..."

"What's wrong?" Kaze asked, drawing close again.

"Your spirit, your soul... does it... feel like it's all there... all _you _there?" Kumo asked, his voice trembling, tears forming in his eyes.

Kaze frowned. "Of course it..." He stopped abruptly, his frown deepening. "Wait... it isn't... but why...? What are you implying?"

Kumo shook his head. "Niisama... it was Niisama who I remember holding me, when I felt like my soul itself was coming apart... he told me... told me that I had to live, then..." He shook his head again, his vision blurring as tears spilled down his cheeks. "I can't believe it... I can't believe it...!"

Kaze stared. "Are you saying... that your brother gave up his soul... fused it to yours... just to keep you alive...? And that's why your hair, and your eye... why you aren't bleeding to death right now...?"

Kumo nodded. "And you... it must have been that poor girl... Lou... she... and Niisama... I can't believe it... I just can't...!"

Kaze carefully put his arms around the swordsman's body as Kumo shuddered, beginning to sob.

"But... that way..." he said softly, trying to work it out. "They're still alive, aren't they?"

"They don't even exist anymore," Kumo wailed into Kaze's shoulder.

"But because of us... because _we're _alive, they're alive as well, right? They became one with us in order to keep us alive... so they too are alive... because we are now one and the same... isn't that right, Shiroi-chan?"

Kumo shook his head, staring up at Kaze with huge tearful eyes. "But... but... they... they deserved to live just as much as we do... Niisama had to go through so much, and... and Lou... she was only a little girl...!"

"They are alive," Kaze said softly, kissing Kumo's cheek. "They loved us so much... and those emotions will always survive, whether they're conscious or not... you know that I would do the same for you, if it came down to that... and I would do it without fear, knowing that I would still be alive in you, seeing and feeling all you did, even if I couldn't consciously know it."

"Kaze..." Kumo curled close to him as Kaze shifted to sit in lotus positon, leaning into his chest, crying until his tears ran dry, safe as his love held him, letting him weep.

Kaze was respectfully silent, gently rocking Kumo in the rhythm of his shaking, sympathetic but knowing that soon the swordsman would feel his brother's spirit as he felt the girl's, her life and love swirling around him in a stream of pure and gentle joy just at living. As Kumo began to regain control, he looked up into Kaze's long face, his eyes wide with the outward expression of his fragility, the seeking of the same sense Kaze had, of the need for love and safety. The gunner smoothed his long hair, touched his lips and chest and the dip of his navel, and kissed him deeply.

"I love you," he whispered into the soft white hair.

"And I you," Kumo murmured back, his arms tightly fitted around his love.

In their moment of joining, as Kaze entered him, he felt a crimson spiral of exultation rise within his heart as the part of him that was Kiri awakened, thrilling at the knowledge of the true depth of emotion.

---

As they lay entwined within the soft grass and the whiteness of the flowers, Kumo spoke.

"What happened to the others...? Do you think they made it?"

Kaze leaned in to kiss Kumo's collarbones. "We did. I'd say it's a certainty."

Shifting, Kumo smiled and closed his eyes, but quickly opened them, pulling out from beneath his love's body and sitting up. "Did you hear that?"

"What?"

"I could have sworn I just heard the echo of a propeller, carried on the wind..."

Kaze sat up as well, straining his vision as he searched the horizon. "Shiroi-chan..."

"Yes?" Kumo turned to him, the odd crescent of crimson beside his pupil flashing.

"I think that something's coming."

The two of them stood, clinging to each other, unable to express the wild hope that thrilled through both their bodies, and watched the cobalt dot draw closer and closer.

"I think..."

"No way. Those lucky sons of bitches. I'll be damned."

"It really is them!"

Silvia dropped to the grass, and the side hatch opened, letting Cid, Lisa, the twins, and their parents spill out, running towards them with happy cries.

"You're alive! You're alive! I can't believe it!"

After trying to get each other's stories out of each other at the same time, they promptly gave up and started laughing--even Kaze, just a little.

"Aren't you two cold?" Cid asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh... uh..." Kaze and Kumo just looked at each other, remembering that neither of them was wearing anything at all. Kumo's entire face flamed pink, and a tinge of red touched Kaze's cheeks.

"Let's get some blankets out here for now," Cid called, laughing again.

A long rectangle of burlap was passed to Kaze, and a folded square of soft crimson cloth to Kumo.

"This..." Smiling sadly, Kumo hugged the red cloak to his chest before throwing it around his shoulders. "Kansha suru."

"So, tell us..." Joe Hayakawa said as they trooped onto the airship. "What happened to you two? How did you survive? And... you look... quite different."

"It's a long story," Kumo said softly. "And you?"

"The Comodeen found us in Gaudium's wreckage. Cid had repaired the damage to Silvia, and they searched the ruins after the castle exploded," Lisa explained. Her face coloring, she pulled something small and silver out of a pocket of her belt. "Um... Kaze, I think this is yours..."

The gunner reached out and took it, his eyebrows going up in surprise. It was the silver, garnet-studded earring he'd always worn; neither he nor Kumo had realized it was missing. With a slight smile, he pressed it back into Lisa's hand. "Keep it," he said softly. "It would look better on you."

The black-haired woman smiled slightly. "Thank you..."

The blue vessel of dreams headed on through the sky, carrying those whose tasks were complete into the future on the wings of the past.

_fin_

Author's Note: I bet you all thought that the previous chapter was the end, right? Well, I wanted this to end better, and besides... as they say, it ain't over till the fat lady sings, and I didn't hear any fat lady then!

(crickets chirp)

Carlotta: La la la la LAAAAA

(more crickets)

Ooookay, then. So... yeah. That's all, everybody. Hope I didn't offend you too badly or scare you too badly, either. The translations for the lyrics in the epilogue and Chapter 10 can be found on the Animelyrics website, in case you want them. And by the way, I'm sorry if I missed any of the typos while going back and fixing the old drafts of the chapters. I really do want this story to work right...

Everybody always complains about Kaze and Kumo's deaths; since I don't have "Huta no Kizuna" yet, I can only make my own version of a story where they live. It's an angsty love story with a happy ending. I like happy endings. So sue me.

See you all next time...


End file.
